


Heart of Gold

by Likeitmatters



Series: Heart Series [1]
Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Adventure, Angst, F/F, Fluff, Gold Rush, champ is a chump, nicole is nicolas, panning for gold, she'll swing an ax, wynonna earp au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-11
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-04-21 15:54:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 34
Words: 76,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14288337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Likeitmatters/pseuds/Likeitmatters
Summary: Nicole knew she never wanted the life her mother and sisters' had.  She makes the decision to leave home and become 'Nicolas' so she can have the freedom to buy and run her own little ranch.  When the Klondike Gold Rush begins, she can think of no better way to make her dream come true.  Little does she know, the dream she thought she had will pale in comparison to one Waverly Hardy.





	1. Prologue - Pleased to Meet You

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, here's the Klondike Gold Rush story that won overwhelmingly. Thanks so much for you input. I will finish the other story in a timely manner, I just had to get this little prologue out. 
> 
> Thanks for having my back too. I guess you can't please everyone, right? lol

The slight, beautiful brunette leans over the railing for the third time in an hour, cursing the very day she was born. She’d been so excited for the four-day boat trip up the Pacific Coast to Seattle, with their final destination being the Klondike to join those on the search for gold. Such a grand adventure for her and her new husband Champ. But just a few hours into the first day and she had gotten terribly nauseous and dizzy.

 

“You’ll get yer sea legs, soon enough, ma’am.” She kept hearing from the overworked, young deck hands and anxious but excited fellow fortune seekers. Each time she’d smile and thank them, wondering if she might just want to join the sea rather than endure this agony.

 

Champ had been great the first day, doting on her and helping her rush to the shared washroom to throw up, but by the middle of the morning on the second day, he had made himself scarce, heading up to the dining room to talk with the other men who had already been up to the Klondike to ask about the best place to stake claims.

 

She didn’t want to be a burden to the women whom they’d been sharing a berth with so she made her way to the deck, hoping each time the fresh air would make her feel better. So far, it hadn’t worked out. Luckily, she only had one and half days more of this. If she survived that is.

 

“Excuse me, Miss.” Waverly hears a young man to her right, upwind of her thankfully, as she’d just vomited over the rail and was wiping her mouth with her well-used handkerchief. She turns to him and the first thing she notices is the incredibly kind eyes he has.

 

“I see you are a little green around the gills.” He says with a crooked, teasing smile that shows off deep dimples. Waverly ducks her head in embarrassment, but beyond that she’s too sick to be overly concerned what the young man had been witnessing for who knows how long. She doesn’t want to be impolite, but she’d rather suffer in silence, by herself.

 

“I was like that too, the first day. This old Indian man showed me a trick.” He says, sliding a bit closer to the woman. Waverly’s first impulse is to move away, not used to a man besides her husband being this close to her purposefully.

 

The tall young man, pauses, sliding back slightly. Even after all these years of living as a male, she sometimes forgets her ruse. She decides to demonstrate the trick on herself, staying a respectful distance from the married woman. “Turn your wrist around so it is facing up and then place two fingers here like this.” She shows the woman where in between the tendons of the wrist. “Now press as hard as you can.”

 

Waverly does so and after the young man sees she’s doing it correctly, he gestures to a deck chair. By the time Waverly is settled in the chair she begins to feel the symptoms dissipate.

 

She looks up, wide-eyed. “Oh my goodness, it’s working!” She says, tears of relief in her eyes. “Thank you, ever so much… Mr…”

 

“Haught. The name is Nicolas Haught.” She says, extending her hand to the young woman, propriety momentarily forgotten at the sight of the woman’s grateful, yet beautiful smile. Waverly only hesitates a second before she reaches up with the hand she’s got her fingers pressed against for an awkward handshake, making them both chuckle.

 

“Waverly Hardy. Pleased to meet you, Mr. Haught.” She says graciously.

 

“Please, call me Nicolas.” She grins.

 

Waverly doesn’t think she’s seen a more handsome, almost beautiful smile. “Then, please, call me Waverly.”

 

 


	2. Seattle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry updates have been slow. This one was speaking to me a bit more loudly, so you get this chapter now! lol They will be longer, and yes the other story is being worked on as well! I hate having too many irons in the fire, but what are ya gonna do?

Nicole plops down unceremoniously on her sack of flour and takes her handkerchief out to wipe her brow. She pulls her list out of her breast pocket and strikes off the last item with a relieved sigh, silently thanking Jesop, an old timer she befriended on the ship. He had been up as far as Dawson City and Nicole pestered him for every bit of information she could get about the best way to get her supplies for the trek and what to expect on her great adventure. _“A lot of backaches, headaches and a new, deep appreciation for being warm, young man.”_ He’d chortled.

 

To be admitted passage to the Klondike, you needed a year supply of everything you’d need to mine and live: food, tools, clothing, shelter, you even had to pack in your own wood and stove.

 

She knew it would be expensive, with the price gouging right near the ports, so she made sure to follow his directions that led her out of the chaos and further in to town where the prices were more reasonable. It took her two days to find everything she needed and despite saving some money by going further in to town, she didn’t have enough money left over to hire a guide. She hoped she could buy or rent a mule when they reached Dyea.

 

…

 

Waverly watches, arms across her chest, as Champ argues with a merchant about how much he’s charging for bacon. She wishes he’d let her do the negotiating. She knew she could fare a lot better than her short-tempered husband if he’d just let her try.

 

“How can you charge that much? It’s robbery!” He bellows and begins to walk away.

 

“It’s not robbery, its supply and demand, son!” The butcher yells back with a good-natured grin as he moves to the next customer.

 

“Where do you plan on getting our bacon then?” Waverly asks as she falls in step with him. He cuts his eyes to her but says nothing. Just lets out a frustrated sigh.

 

“I knew things would be expensive, but…” He finally says as he stops at their small pile of supplies they’d managed to gather in two days. He looks at his list and then to Waverly.

 

“Fine. Can you go back to the butcher? See if maybe he’ll give _you_ a deal?” He says so begrudgingly she almost smirks.

 

She reaches out her hand and he gives her a sack of coins and a few dollars. “Just… don’t be _too_ nice, okay?” He says with weary exasperation.

 

“I won’t.” She smiles now and gives him a peck on the cheek, excited to finally have an important task to help in their big adventure.

 

She’s making her way to the butcher’s through a throng of excited gold rushers, anxious to get their supplies and then back on the ship when she sees a tall man with familiar rust colored hair. It’s mostly covered by a wide-brimmed felt hat, but Waverly recognizes him instantly.

 

“Mr. Haught!” She calls out. She grins as he pivots around for the source of the voice. Finally he lays eyes on her and gives her a wide, dimpled grin as he takes wide strides across the street towards her.

 

“Mrs. Hardy. I thought I told you to call me Nicolas.” She speaks through her smile and Waverly ducks her head with a grin.

 

“And I thought I told you to call me Waverly.” She says, looking up and meeting those soulful brown eyes.

 

“Indeed you did.” She says, tipping her hat in apology. “How are you faring on solid ground?” Nicole asks, her concern genuine.

 

“Oh, much better. The rest of the trip was bearable thanks to you.” Waverly says with a relieved sigh. “I truly didn’t think I’d make it.”

 

“You seem like you are made of tough stock. I bet you would have found a way.” Nicole comments with a crooked smile, but it slides off her face when Waverly’s eyes narrow.

 

“You calling me stocky?” She challenges and Nicole’s mouth hangs open, her tongue wrestling with an apology when Waverly breaks into a squinty-eyed smile.

 

“I will take that as the compliment I’m sure you intended. I’ll have you know, I _am_ related to the Earp family, so…” She demurs as Nicole’s mouth finally shuts.

 

Nicole regards the woman with a hint of surprise, letting her face show her impress at the statement.

 

“Earps _are_ pretty well known for being tough.” Nicole muses, remembering reading plenty of articles about them in the _Harper’s Monthly_. “I suppose this trek up to the Klondike will only minimally test the fortitude of someone related to Wyatt Earp.” She says with a wink, making Waverly laugh. The sound delights Nicole and something pleasant and light stirs within her chest.

 

“Well, Nicolas, if you are done teasing me now, I must go fetch some bacon at an astronomical price.” She says as she steps back up onto the curb, bringing her a little closer to the red-head’s height.

 

Nicole makes a quick decision and leans in close to the brunette. Waverly’s eyes widen slightly at the proximity, but she doesn’t back away.

 

“I’ll let you in on a little secret. If you walk two blocks south.” She points, extending her long, lithe arm, “You’ll find everything you’ll need at a much more reasonable price.” She says in a low, conspiring whisper.

 

“Is this true?” Waverly asks, pulling her head back in slight disbelief.

 

Nicole nods as she points to her own supplies and whispers the price she paid in full.

 

“Well, boy will my husband be overjoyed at _this_ news.” Waverly laughs as she picks up her dress a bit, ready to make haste back to her husband. She bows her head in thanks and calls back over her shoulder to the handsome, helpful young man. “Thanks, Nicolas! See you on the trail!” She grins widely and gives a little wave and Nicole has to stifle a giddy giggle and wave, instead going for a lazy grin and a quick nod.

 

…

 

It takes twelve trips up the gangplank and back, but Nicole has all of her supplies neatly and securely tucked away near the bow of the ship. She’s tied it down with as much rope as she could buy and as the ship begins to pull away from the dock, she’s not sure she has the energy to even make it back to her sleeping berth, let alone the galley for a bite to eat. She normally waits well into the night to retire, having to do her evening ablutions in private as she is assigned to the shared berths inhabited by single men.

 

It had taken a while to get used to close quarters with men while on the ship headed to Canada. She’d been masquerading as a man for nearly two years and where some attributes come easily because of her height and her tomboy upbringing, there’s no doubting she’s all woman under her breeches, oil-cloth pants, wool shirt and vest. She had to be careful and that meant spending a good amount of time alone, for she couldn’t reveal her true identity to anyone, male or female. In her eyes, it was a rather small price to pay in order to live her life the way _she_ wanted.

 

She’s about to drift off to sleep, or maybe she already had when a loud voice causes her to snap her head up off of the bag of bedding she’d been lounging on atop her supplies.

 

“You can buy your sewing kit with our first gold find, Waverly!” She hears a man boom, not too far from her. She turns around and peers over her stuff at the mention of the beautiful brunette woman’s name.

 

“That must be the husband.” She grouses, not surprised when she sees he looks exactly like she’d pictured him. What does surprise her is the fact that she’d pictured him at all. And that she automatically didn’t care for him.

 

“We will figure something out. Right now our priority is hiring help to get all this stuff to Dawson City. Use your brain, woman!” He shouts as he throws his hands up.

 

Instead of cowering though, Nicole watches as the woman sets her jaw and drops down onto the pile of supplies in a huff. “I needed the sewing kit so I could fashion a functional outfit for the trek. I’ll be of no use either if I can’t even move!” She hollers back to him although with more venom than volume.

 

Nicole can’t help but smile a bit however when she watches Waverly sigh heavily, turn to face the ocean and place her fingers against her wrist, just like she’d showed her.

 

She gets a bit lost in staring at the moonlit profile of the young woman until and idea pops into her brain. She pulls away a few supplies, mindful of the now slightly loosened rope and pulls out a small wooden box. She sets it next to her and begins to doze off again, planning to present Waverly with the box tomorrow morning.

 


	3. Dyea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thought I'd update this one since I had the chapter done! Had a city correction in last chapter. I have them docking at Dyea, not Skagway for those that know their Klondike Gold Rush history! lol

Nicole is brought to wakefulness by the gentle rocking of her sleeping berth as she feels the ship slow considerably. She sits up, mindful of the bunk right above her and scrubs her face and wipes the sleep out of her eyes. She sees she’s alone in the small, cramped room and sighs with relief as she makes quick work of pulling on her trousers over her long-johns and hastily rewraps her breasts, making sure her heavy wool shirt sits nicely across a flat chest. She heads to the washroom, glad for an open stall and takes care of her morning ablutions.

 

She makes it top side just as the crewmen lower the gangway and are nearly pushed overboard by the eager gold rushers, carrying their supplies. She looks over the rail at the bustling town of Dyea, one of the main gateways to the Klondike. Rows and rows of crude log houses, tents and a few small stone buildings are teeming with people, both white and native, crates, mules, piles of lumber, sacks carrying last minute supplies for the trek. The snow has turned to frozen mud down the main street with all the foot and animal traffic and Nicole wonders how they are all going to get themselves all unloaded and organized. There’s barely room near the dock to walk let alone unload supplies just yet.

 

She sees no reason in rushing and fighting the crowd, since they will be laying over for the night anyway here anyway, so she meanders over and begins to parcel out her stock into smaller piles so she can take it all down in as few trips as possible.

 

She looks over to where Waverly and her husband’s supplies are and it looks like they’ve already taken their first load. She scans the dock and surrounding area, her eyes brightening when they come upon the fetching brunette in a white blouse and blue and white striped long skirt. Her hair is in a loose French braid and she has a bright white wide-brimmed sun hat on. Nicole suddenly remembers the box she was going to give her and pulls it out of the bag she stuffed it in and places it under her arm. She hefts a sack over her shoulder and joins the line of people disembarking.

 

 

“I’ll see about hiring a packer, you stay here.” Champ instructs his wife. She nods absently as she sits atop their supplies, arms tucked tight across her chest, eyes taking in the spectacle. She’s engrossed in watching an old man attempting to harness a team of mangy looking dogs when she hears a now familiar voice coming from her left side.

 

“Here it begins.” Nicole says in her trained ‘male voice’ as she sidles up next to Waverly, but not too close, earning her a mildly surprised but polite smile.

 

She too watches the old man and the uncooperative dogs and chuckles as one slips out and begins to walk away as he fights with another one.

 

“Champ’s trying to get us a packer, but…” Waverly says as she sees several other gold rushers doing the same.

 

“They can cost quite a bit. Especially the big, strong ones.” Nicole notes. She’s decided to forgo spending money, figuring she’ll just make extra trips. She’d rather save it for an emergency.

 

“Listen, I didn’t mean to pry, but last night I heard you were in need of a sewing kit? I have one here …” She slips the box out from under her arm and presents it to Waverly.

 

“Oh, uh.. Thank you, Mr. Haught.. I mean Nicolas.” She says, looking up to her with a puzzled expression until she remembers the nature of the conversation. _How embarrassing for him to hear Champ speak to me that way!_ “But we are going to get one up in Dawson City.” She says, trying to hand the box back.

 

Nicole doesn’t take it though, instead, pressing it back towards her as her big, calloused palm wraps around Waverly’s small, soft hand. Waverly’s eyes widen slightly and she brings it back to her, severing the touch. Nicole drops her hand quickly.

 

“Honestly, Waverly. I don’t know how to sew, so…” She gives her a small, rueful smile.

 

“Well in that case, I propose a fair trade. I’ll take the sewing kit and any mending you need, I’ll do it for you.” Waverly nods smartly.

 

“Sounds like a good deal.” Nicole says with a dimpled grin.

 

“Waverly!” They hear and the brunette turns to her husband who is stalking over, eyebrows furrowed.

 

“Who is this you are talking too?” He asks tersely. Nicole bristles at the fact he doesn’t even look at her. It immediately tells her something about him. All bark, no bite.

 

“This is Nicolas Haught, we met on the boat. He’s the one who give us the advice on the supplies.” Waverly says quickly, hoping to soften her husband’s attitude with the information.

 

Finally, he looks up at her and they are dead level in the eye. Nicole reaches out her hand.

 

“I’m Champ Hardy. This is my _wife_ , Waverly.” It takes all of Nicole’s self control not to remind him he’s already met her as she takes special note of the man’s soft hands. She squeezes a bit more than she normally would when shaking a man’s hand and smiles inwardly at the small wince that goes over the man’s face.

 

“Have any luck finding someone?” Nicole asks, trying to break the tension. Waverly looks mildly mortified at Champ’s manners and all Nicole wants to do is put her at ease.

 

“Just a couple of goddamn squaws and they were asking way more than they’re worth, I’m sure.” He snarls with disdain.

 

Nicole clinches her teeth so she won’t say anything back to the man she’ll regret. She tips her hat at Waverly and gives him a curt nod.

 

“Well, best be unloading my rig. Have a good day.” She says and turns to make her way up the gangway.

 

“He’s a weird fella.” Champ says, watching her go up the gangway with a wary stare.

 

…

 

Bright and early the next morning, the stampeders begin to make the trek towards Chilkoot Pass. Those that could afford packers were in the lead and those doing it themselves were bringing up the rear. Both Nicole and the Hardys were able to buy second hand but sturdy sleds that would make moving their year’s worth of supplies over the frozen ground easier. It was slow going though and as they approached the first mile, both ‘men’ were rethinking their whole Klondike adventure. It seemed Nicole was faring a bit better, used to hard labor. Once she’d started living as a man, she sought out the hardest jobs, mostly because they were the most solitary, but also to prove she was just as hardy and strong as any man.

 

She almost felt bad for Champ, watching him sweat through his woolen shirt even at such cold temperatures. He had to stop frequently and it irked Nicole to have to stop behind him, pulling her out of her mindless yet steady pace. She couldn’t imagine doing this during the spring thaw, when the trail would be calf-deep mud instead of the hard, slick frozen ground it is now.

 

So she distracts herself by watching Waverly, still in a corset and pulling up her long skirt past her ankles. Nicole images it might be easier pulling this sled than trying to cross the terrain in her get-up.

 

She studies her, hat abandoned, tossed off to hang on her pack of supplies by the leather cord still around her neck. Her perfect, loose French braid is losing its battle against wind and exertion and the fine hairs around her face and nape of her neck have begun to free themselves. There is a light sheen of sweat high up on her brow and under her jaw and every time she’d pass her on the way to get another bundle of supplies, Nicole found herself just wanting to guide her off to a smooth tree stump and offer her some water.

 

But there is an urgency to this first leg because getting to Chilkoot Pass with some sun left meant you could get a jump on getting supplies up the pass. A daunting task that takes days and the sooner one got to it, the sooner they could get to Dawson City to stake their claim.

 

“I’m gonna have to do something about this skirt.” Waverly mumbles, trying to fish the fabric from between her knees so she doesn’t trip. She knows she has no right to complain, seeing the men and the packers laboring over moving their supplies. Even with the help of the sleds, it still took several trips to move the ton of supplies from point A to point B. She is merely tasked with filling the smallish pack with the lighter and delicate things while the men had big heavy rucksacks to carry as well as pulling their sleds with hundreds of pounds of supplies at a time.

 

She figures when they break for the night, after dinner, she’ll take out the sewing kit Nicolas gave her and fashion some sort of knickers out of one of her thinner skirts.

 

She smiles as she passes the tall man, her smile widening ever so slightly when he gives her a tired, dimpled grin and dips his hat.

 

Champ, who wasn’t far behind Waverly catches the interaction and is none too pleased. There’s something off about that man and the way he regards Waverly is beginning to get to him. He thinks he may have to have a little talk with the red-headed man.

 

 

They get one trip in up the pass and by the time their small group all gets up to the top, all they really want to do is lay out their bedroll and sleep.

 

“I’ll get a fire started.” Nicole announces and begins to wander into the woods to collect kindling.

“That’s the woman’s job. You sit yerself down, son.” Clem, an old ‘49er from the States calls to her as he begins to lay out his waterproof blanket near his supplies.

 

Nicole, Champ and Waverly all turn to look at him and he just gestures to the slight native women that someone ended up hiring in a nearby group. One was setting up a pot and pouring in a couple of tins of beans while the other was getting a fire going. The male packers were curled up with merely a small blanket, already sleeping.

 

Champ looks to Waverly, shrugs and continues pulling out their bedrolls.

 

“It’s women’s work, see.” The old man, says with a near toothless grin.

 

Waverly sighs, but doesn’t say anything as she goes back to their supplies and begins to pull out some cans of food. Nicole, Clem and another younger man who goes by Carl do the same, setting them over by Waverly.

 

“If it’s all the same to you, I’ll go get some wood. I have to relieve myself anyway.” She says as she shoots a look over to Waverly who gives her a small grateful smile.

 

She goes deep enough where she can barely hear voices and pulls out from her pocket a small, modified wineskin with a flared opening on top and a small open tip at the end. She unbuttons her pants and slides the contraption in between her legs, holding the spout clear of her boots. She sighs as she feels her bladder release and looks down to make sure the flow is coming out the tip.

 

She hears the crunch of snow and leaves getting louder and louder and hurries to finish, shaking it out and sliding it back into her pocket. She’s buttoning her pants when she hears Champ’s voice.

 

“Hell of a day.” He says with a heavy, tired sigh. He pulls his pants open and whips out his member causing Nicole to turn abruptly and begin collecting some dry kindling.

 

“Yes, and we get to do it all over again and again and again, tomorrow.” She says over her shoulder. She hears a low chuckle and then the sound of rustling fabric.

 

“I should have hired them squaws. They do work.” He says, spitting near Nicole’s feet. Too close for it not to be unintentional.

 

“You married, Nicolas?” He asks, looking up at her pointedly.

 

“No.” She says, readjusting her growing pile of fire wood. She watches him take the information in and then nod as if he expected that answer.

 

“Well, then you don’t quite understand the anger a man can have when another man takes a likin’ to his wife.” He says, low and full of warning, staring her down for a good few seconds before he brushes past her, nearly knocking the wood out of her arms.

 

 

Nicole makes her way back to camp, making quick work of starting the fire. She fights down the urge to give Waverly a hand, seeing how utterly exhausted she is, but doesn’t want to give Champ cause.

 

After the fire is nice and strong, she goes back to her pack, pulling out her bedroll and then taking out a leather bound book and opening it up as she fishes for her small stub of a pencil and soon she’s lost in the process of writing down the events of the day until Waverly announces that dinner is ready.


	4. Chilkoot Pass

Seeing the pass from the top in the clear morning light is daunting. To Waverly even going up seemed like a never-ending, treacherous climb in the mushy snow. Going down seemed suicidal. Waverly had no idea how she was going to go up and down the pass several times a day, in a skirt no less, as she’d had no time to alter it the night before.

 

The first nation women whom Champ balked at hiring were already coming up the long line of stampeders with their first load on their backs that looked every bit as heavy as the men’s. They were small, slight women, twins, Waverly surmises but they were so strong! They also dawned heavy oil-cloth knickers, much like the men wear, but a bit shorter.

She tugged her coat around her shoulders, buttoning the top few buttons and then gathering her skirt up to start the descent down the pass. She carefully, slowly follows in her husband’s footprints as he ambles his way down slowly as well with as much enthusiasm as she felt. It was going to be a very long couple of days.

 

…

 

Nicole adjusts the straps holding her largest crate to her back. She wobbles a bit, nearly pitching forward as she tries to find her balance. Hiking up the steep incline would be a challenge, but at least they fashioned a rope to grab on to as one ascended the ‘Golden Staircase’ as it was known. Even if she fell, as selfish as it was, she wouldn’t fall far as there would be a line of stampeders behind her to slow her descent. She’d already seen it happen late yesterday in the mad dash to get one run in before nightfall.

 

As is now her habit, she picks her head up and looks around for a certain brunette, not hard to pick out in the sea of men, and frowns at the sight. She’s got a pack on her back that looks to weigh half her weight. She’s trying to balance as she holds her skirt up away from her ankles as Champ is concentrating on his own heavy pack.

 

Nicole hangs back from joining the line until she sees Waverly heading towards it. She manages to get right behind the couple and she shakes her head when Champ gets in front of Waverly instead of behind her to look out for her.

 

“Morning, Nicolas.” Waverly says quietly with a small smile as her eyes dart over to her husband. Nicole wonders if Champ had had a talk with Waverly as well.

 

“Morning to you, Waverly.” Nicole greets with a dimpled smile, Champ be damned.

 

“You might want to go in front of me, I’m afraid I’m going to be extremely slow.” She frowns as she makes a small hopping motion to get the pack to settle better. It nearly topples her over and Nicole puts out a hand to steady her.

 

“My pack is wickedly heavy as well, Waverly. Your pace will give me a chance to rest.” Nicole assures and Waverly’s drawn expression brightens considerably.

 

“Well then, shall we?” Waverly asks as the line moves steadily towards the first step. She turns fully to start the trek before Nicole can respond, but Nicole doesn’t notice as her eyes catch a glimpse of Waverly’s shapely calves above her boots as she hikes up her skirt so she doesn’t step on it.

 

 

They are nearly halfway up and Nicole can see Waverly is really struggling. She peeks around her to see the gap widening between her and Champ. In the interest of getting her supplies to where she needs them quicker, she almost thinks to jump Waverly in line. After all, she’s not her wife, not someone she’s responsible for. But she cannot bring herself to do it. So she plods behind Waverly, ignoring the grumbling behind her from the other stampeders anxious to get up the pass.

 

She decides to take a look around, scanning the tree line for anything of interest. It’s a mercifully cloudy day so the reflection of the sun off the snow isn’t blinding, but it does make it a bit colder. She is marveling at all the equipment, obviously broken or abandoned for sake of weight that litters the area just over the rope rail when she hears Waverly gasp then shriek and then she’s being barreled into. She instinctually grips the rope rail with all her might to keep their tumble contained and Nicole realizes in horror that Waverly has bounced off of her and is beginning to slide perilously down the mountain, pack and all. She reaches as far as she can and just catches the strap of Waverly’s pack, stopping her slide. The muscles in her shoulders and arms scream as a man on the descent without a heavy pack rushes over to help right Waverly and get her back in line.

 

“I’m so sorry, I stepped on my blasted skirt.” She mumbles with frustrated, terrified tears in her eyes.

 

“It’s okay. Happens to me all the time.” Says the man who came to help as Nicole takes over in getting Waverly balanced and her hand back on the rope rail. They look at him with shock until the man behind Nicole starts laughing.

 

“That’s a good one, Jack!”

 

Waverly finds herself laughing too at the man’s gracious attempt to put her at ease. She gives the man an eternally grateful, beaming smile.

 

“Thank you very much for the help, Mr…”

 

“London, Jack London, ma’am. You should see about getting yourself some knickers like the women packers have.” He smiles and tips his hat briefly before setting back down the pass.

 

Waverly turns as much as she dares, quickly placing a hand over Nicole’s as it holds on to the rope. “And thank you for your quick reaction, Nicolas. I would have really been in trouble had you not caught me.” Nicole can only see Waverly’s profile, but she sees the smile on the brunette’s face.

 

Nicole pats her hand. “I’m just glad I was behind you to help.” She says looking pointedly at Champ’s back, too far away to even know his wife had fallen.

 

“My hero.” Waverly adds, almost too quiet for Nicole to hear, but she does and that little sting of irrational jealousy aimed at the charming Mr. London dulls considerably.

 

…

 

After multiple trips up and down the pass, the small group finally break for the night, erecting their canvas tents for the remaining couple of nights. Waverly is still on cooking and cleaning duty but Champ actually helps with the fire after hearing about his wife’s mishap. Nicole made sure he felt guilty as they both recalled the incident.

 

After dinner, everyone settles into their respective tents, exhausted from the day’s work of hauling their supplies up the pass. Nicole waits until she hears nothing but snores and slips out of her tent to take care of her business. She gets to the other side of the fire and sees Waverly sitting next to it, tearing apart one of her skirts. An idea comes to Nicole and she goes back into her tent, pulling out her one extra pair of oil-skin pants.

 

“They’ll be a little long and you’ll have to wear a belt, but they’ll be a huge improvement over your skirt and you don’t have to stay up half the night making them.” Nicole smiles as she offers them up.

 

“Nicolas, I can’t. I can’t imagine you have another pair and…” Nicole rolls her eyes at her words.

 

“Look, I don’t think my arms can take catching you again.” She says, making a show of shaking them out.

 

Waverly looks slightly mortified but Nicole softens and smiles.

 

“Either you’ll be so exhausted staying up and making your own pants, or tripping over your lovely, but very impractical skirt. This is for everyone behind you in line.” She smiles, showing her dimple.

 

Waverly shakes her head, knowing the thoughtful man is just teasing her now, but she hears the logic in his words. Finally, she ducks her head and takes them.

 

“Just do me a favor and tell him someone else lent them to you. I don’t want to give your husband more reason to distrust me.” Nicole says with a frown.

 

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell him. I am sorry he acts like a…” She searches for the right word that won’t be too inappropriate but is let off the hook.

 

“Like a typical man. Have a good night, Waverly. See you on the pass in the morning.” Nicole says, picking up her lantern and making her way into the forest to relieve herself in peace.

 

“Well, you Mr. Haught, are anything but typical.” Waverly says with an amused chuckle as she starts to pack away her sewing kit and roll up her skirt.

 

…

 

By late morning of the fifth day, their group completes the trek up the pass with all of their gear. They stop for supper and spend the rest of the afternoon breaking camp and loading up their packs and sleds. They have a two day journey ahead to Lake Bennett where they’ll camp and build their own boats to transport themselves and all their goods down the Yukon River to Dawson City. It is the final leg and even though they still have a ways to go, everyone is in pretty good spirits, if not bone tired.

 

Nicole is pleased at how adept Waverly is at moving around, now that she has an outfit conducive to the treacherous journey. She figured all Waverly needed was to be able to move properly and she was right. She held her own on the trips both up and down the pass. Every now and then she would give Nicole a wide smile and Nicole was always quick to return it, her heart warmed that she made the brunette so happy.

 

Not to mention seeing Waverly in her pants gave her an inordinate sense of pride. When Waverly tried to give them back after that first day, she told her to keep them and that she’d take it out in trade when they got to Dawson City in the form of Waverly baking her something sweet once they all got settled.

 

She frowns at the memory though of Champ giving her a hard time first for wearing pants, as it was unbecoming and unladylike. She shut him down quickly though when she showed him again the bruises and scrapes from her tumble that second day. When he pressed her about where she got them, she simply said she bought them off of one of the first nation women.

 

To his credit, he realized he didn’t have much more to say on the issue, especially when the other men in the group gave him judgmental looks as he followed her around, literally whining about how he married a woman, not a man. Nicole chuckled to herself at that, but was beyond happy he finally just shut up and accepted it.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Lake Bennett

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys crack me up. I have a feeling you all wouldn't mind if Champ met a fairly quick demise? 
> 
> I think some of you snuck into my outline notes... lol
> 
> But, he will certainly not be the only hindrance for the two... just sayin'.

Nicole drops her pack unceremoniously next to the rest of her supplies. Her back is numb and her shoulders and thighs are screaming. The distance from Chilkoot Pass to Lake Bennett was in fact a two day trip, however with about 2,000 pounds of supplies to move, it took the stampeders a long, grueling two weeks.

 

Where Chilkoot Pass was steep and treacherous it was relatively short, but the journey to Lake Bennett seemed never ending and arduous. A downright slog that sapped the energy and will of even the toughest of fortune seekers.

 

There wasn’t a suitable place to stop and drop supplies for about ten miles and the sleds were only usable on half the highly-trafficked, west-facing trail on account of slush forming once the cold snap broke. Every mile felt like five and there was at least one stampeder a day that decided it was just too much and turned back, selling what he could to others that had lost supplies along the way and trudging back, broken and defeated.

 

Nicole would be lying if she said the thought hadn’t crossed her mind. None of the stories, hell not even Jesop, the old man she talked to on the ship, rightly prepared her for what was in store. And they were only half way with a couple more months of traveling by water, this time on boats they’d all have to make with their own hands. But still the dream of making enough money to buy her very own ranch was still strong and she could think of no faster way to do it.

 

She barely has the strength to open a can of beans much less pitch her tent. She sinks down to the frozen ground, back against her sack of rolled oats and closes her eyes.

 

She hears the jovial old man, Clem, shuffle past her, breathing dangerously labored. He still has one or two more loads to go and Nicole is ashamed to realize she has absolutely no desire to help him. Well, maybe desire she has, but certainly not the energy.

 

 

She hadn’t realized she dozed off until she feels a soft kick to her boot that startles her awake.

 

“Storm’s a rollin’ in. Better get yer tent up.” Carl says, pointing to the east.

 

Nicole nods and thanks him, slowly getting up with a grimace as every muscle in her body is making itself known.

 

She unties the straps holding her tent and bedroll and looks to see where Champ and Waverly have made camp. When they arrived on their first trip, there look to be hundreds of stampeders near the still-frozen lakeshore and as the group filed in, they took whatever empty space they could.

 

She finally spots them some fifty feet away, near a few large logs stacked neatly to dry. They look like they’ll be a nice natural windbreak when the storm comes through and she has half a mind to move her camp there, but decides against it. Instead she drives her tent posts in near her supplies and makes quick work of tossing in her waterproof blanket and bedroll. She stands to stretch her back and looks over at the sea of tents and log buildings lining the main road, wishing she had the energy to go look around a bit.

 

Since news of the first gold strike almost a year ago, Lake Bennett has become a bona-fide city, setting up quickly with the onslaught of stampeders and those looking to make a few bucks off of the weary travelers. Stampeders with a bit of cash could even get a hotel room with a hot bath and a hot meal. What Nicole wouldn’t do for just one of those things right now. But she knew she had to save every penny. The river was notorious for swallowing up supplies… and stampeders.

 

…

 

 

Waverly awoke to the sound of raindrops pelting their canvas tent and wind gusting against the top, causing it to sway and the wooden posts to creak. She stares up at the oil lantern, squeaking as it gently sways back and forth from it’s hook on the apex of their tent.

 

She stretches long and hard, relieved beyond measure that they do not have to make any more treks to Chilkoot Pass to transfer their supplies.

 

She turns to see Champ snoring softly, facing her, and takes a few moments to study his handsome features. She thinks back to when he began courting her after her sixteenth birthday. How awkward it had been as they’d known each other their whole lives. In a span of a couple of years he’d gone from teasing her mercilessly, tugging her hair when she’d try to sit and listen to their teacher, Mrs. Williams’ lessons and setting frogs next to her when she’d sit with her friends at recess, to walking her home, holding her lunch pail and offering his coat when there was a chill in the air.

 

She’d never really stopped to think how she felt about him. She had no reference for being in love other than what she’d read on the pages of the Jane Austen books she’d devoured when she wasn’t in school or doing chores.  

 

Love didn’t seem to be much of a requirement in real life marriage, going by her parents anyway. Champ was nice enough, charming enough and most importantly, he offered her a way out of her small town, steeped in her family’s history and reputation. He talked of adventure she’d never be able to set out on her own for and so when he told her father his intentions and was granted permission to marry his youngest, Waverly said yes and never looked back. Now a year into her marriage she was a thousand miles from home, heading to the great beyond in search of gold!

 

Sure the journey had been something she hadn’t expected-at all- and Champ proved to be extremely gruff and taciturn when things got less than ideal, but she had to believe that once they reached the gold fields and staked their claim, they’d set up a nice little home for the year and be able to pull enough nuggets from the ground to do and go wherever they pleased.

 

She wonders what it will be like up there, really. She’d read newspaper articles, listened to people on the boat talk excitedly about Eldorado Creek outside of Dawson. The tales ranged from just picking nuggets right out of the bottom of the creek to having to blast half a mountain to get a speck of gold dust. She imagines the truth to be somewhere in the middle. One thing is for sure though, it couldn’t possibly _not_ be worth it because why would so many people put themselves through a months long trip, carrying nearly a ton of supplies to an unknown place near the top of the world?

 

…

 

After a fitful, freezing sleep, Nicole rises before the sun. She dresses quickly, lamenting the fact that she only had the pair of oil-skin pants. She wouldn’t trade that fact for anything though, knowing how much easier her extra pair had made life for Waverly.

 

In the time she was able to sleep, she’d dreamt of the brunette. It was of a vision she barely let herself explore in her waking moments, the dream of being with someone who adored her, making a life together.

 

_Nicole is wading her way across the shallow part of a river, carrying a rabbit she’d trapped. She looks up to the other end of the bank and sees Waverly sunbathed and beautiful in a cornflower blue dress, looking at her with such love as a wide smile spreads across her face._

 

It warmed her heart immeasurably, but upon waking, left her slightly despondent when she realized it was just a dream. She knew it was yet another price to pay, forgoing companionship, when she chose to dress and act like a man. She’d concluded long ago she could only ever see herself with someone of the fairer sex but could never bring herself to venture further into her masquerade and seek female companionship. How far could she really get anyway without them figuring it all out? She knew she could seek physical connection in a brothel, for as long as one’s money was right, the women would do anything, no questions asked. But she wasn’t interested in that. Along with her own little ranch, she would welcome a chance to share it with someone. And until she met Waverly, the want had never been so keen.

 

But of course, there were several reasons that would never come to be. Waverly is married, to a real man. Nicole is a woman, acting as a man. She could never know the truth and even if she did, would never be with Nicole, not like Nicole would want to be with her. She knew stories of what happened to her kind. She imagines it would be ten times worse if her kind was caught living as a man.

 

She shakes off the morose thoughts, she doesn’t have time for them. She’s got to find out the way to go about building a boat that will be strong and sturdy enough to carry her and her supplies down 500 miles of fast moving water.

 

…

 

“How long ‘til the river starts runnin’ again?” Champ asks as he scrubs his stubbly chin.

 

“Lookin’ at about two months.” Clem says as he picks through the whip saws they’ll need to cut down logs and turn them into planks.

 

“Geez.” The sandy haired man sighs, deflated.

 

“It’ll take that long to build a boat to carry everythin’ anyway.” He says, perturbed by the young man. Didn’t he do any research before bringing his sweet bride out here into the northern wilderness?

“Well, I ain’t never built no boat before.” He huffs as he continues to watch Clem inspect the teeth of one of the newer looking saws.

 

“Well, you better find you someone who does. Takes two men anyway.” Clem says, side-eyeing Champ before he can even ask. “I got Carl with me, so you’ll have to ask around.” He says, dismissing him as he rounds the bin to look at saws on the other side.

 

“Well, shit.” Champ grumps as he looks around for someone seemingly on their own that doesn’t look as green as he does.

 

…

 

 

“Hello, sir! We meet again.” Nicole hears and turns to see the young man who helped her with Waverly on the Chilkoot Pass. “How is your wife? None the worse for wear after her tumble, I hope?” He asks around a cordial smile.

 

Nicole stares at him confused for a moment. “Oh, she isn’t… we weren’t together.” Nicole says, clearing her throat, almost losing her deeper timber at the question.

 

“She alone, out here?” He asks, brows furrowed in concern.

 

“Oh, no, her husband’s with her out here. Just not then. He was up a ways.” Nicole explains with a shrug

 

“What kind of husband would let his wife walk up that pass alone? Not saying she’s not capable, but…” He shakes his head in mild disbelief.

 

“Indeed.” She agrees with a commiserating nod. “I’m Nicolas Haught, by the way.” She says, trying to remember the man’s name and hoping he’ll supply it again.

 

“Nice to formally meet you, Nicolas. I’m Jack London.” He says with a wide grin as he puts his hand out for her to shake.

 

“Well, Jack, you wouldn’t happen to need a boat building partner would you?” Nicole asks, taking a liking to the man after a bit more interaction.

 

“Well, it depends. You know your way around a saw? Hammer? Nails?” He asks with an arched eyebrow.

 

“I do.” Nicole answers confidently. Though she’s never used any of them to build a boat before.

 

“Well, I guess you found a partner then.” He answers with a grin as he claps Nicole on the shoulder with a laugh.

 

 

 


	6. Yukon River

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, writing a woman pretending to be a man in third person is challenging! Let me know if the use of Nicole/Nicolas her/him is getting confusing to anyone.
> 
> Also, I have written Jack London into the story, cuz, why not?! 'Call of the Wild' is like one of the best novels ever and I love historical psuedo-accuracy! lol
> 
> Anyway, enjoy the Champ/Nicolas interaction while you can!! ;)

“Morning, Nicolas.” Waverly greets with a small smile, handing him a steaming cup of coffee. It’s not the strong stuff she prefers, but if it’s Waverly making it, she’s not going to complain.

 

“Morning Waverly.” Nicole smiles back as she takes a seat, stretching her back.

 

As part of the deal of taking on Champ as a boat building partner (after Waverly had asked when no one else would take him on), Jack made sure to propose that Champ had to cook breakfast every morning. Of course that meant Waverly did, but she was more than happy to oblige, openly shushing Champ when he complained about their food stores.

 

So, every morning Nicole made sure to get up early and get there before Jack, knowing Champ wouldn’t get up until Waverly called for him when breakfast was ready, and sometimes not even then.

 

The tall redhead cherished the mornings she got to visit with Waverly as she made breakfast. It was the only thing to get her out of bed those first few weeks when she was so sore she thought she might just shrivel up and die from the back breaking work of falling giant trees and cutting them down to planks for their boats.

 

In low voices, Nicole sipping coffee, Waverly cooking beans and bacon, they talked about their plans once they hit the gold fields and beyond. Nicole confided in Waverly about wanting to buy a ranch out in the southwest. Waverly talked about her craving for adventure and desire to travel. They were convinced they would hit a big enough pay streak to make all their dreams come true, like all of the other stampeders did.

 

What surprised Nicole somewhat was how Waverly peppered her with all sorts of questions about how much land he wanted, what he wanted to raise, if he had any kin out where he wanted to build his ranch. Nicole recalls one question Waverly asked that she has since played over and over in her mind, right before sleep takes her at night.

 

_“And what about a wife, Nicolas? Are you interested in finding one to settle down with at your ranch?” Waverly asks as she pours Nicole’s second cup. Nicole’s eyes dart up to Waverly’s but Waverly can’t seem to meet them._

_Nicole contemplates an easy, generic answer, but emboldened by the long pause and the way Waverly continues to duck her eyes and tuck her bottom lip into her teeth as if she’s apprehensive about her answer, she swallows hard and says, “If they are as smart, sweet and pretty as you, I’d consider it.”_

_She watches Waverly’s face carefully, enthralled at the succession of expressions that come across her face: eyes widening in surprise, followed by a slight blush that ends in a shy but radiant smile. “Well, if someone like_ that _encounters you, Nicolas Haught, she’d be hard-pressed not to fall for such a handsome, kind, gentleman.”_

Nicole is brought out of her reverie when she hears Champ rustling around in the tent and looks up to see him coming out disheveled and shirtless, his suspenders hanging at his sides, much earlier than usual.

 

Waverly hastily pours a cup of coffee for him and walks it over, a tepid smile on her face. Champ notices Nicolas sitting at his fire and makes a show of smiling smugly at Waverly and grabbing her hand to pull her in for a kiss. “Morning, Darlin’. He coos as his eyes slide to Nicolas. “Hope we didn’t wake you last night.” He says with a smirk that gets quickly hidden as he brings his cup to his lips. His eyes continue to lock onto Nicole’s though and she has a hard time not getting up and punching him right back into his tent.

Waverly looks at him, stunned at his actions and then turns back to the fire, mortified.

 

“I’m gonna go get Jack.” Nicole offers as she sets her cup down and ambles out of their camp.

 

She nearly stomps through the muddy path to Jack’s tent, irritated and edgy. It’s been a chore, working with Champ the last month and with each passing day of spending just a bit more time in Waverly’s company, she’s really questioning how a sweet, good-natured young woman like Waverly ever agreed to marry that sorry excuse of a man. Perhaps she didn’t have a choice. Either way, it really wasn’t Nicole’s business. And she’s sure the second they hit Dawson City, Champ will try and find a claim furthest from her. Even Jack mentioned something about how much Champ was threatened by the tall redhead. It gave Nicole pause, but she wasn’t going to tiptoe around the man just because he had a fragile ego. He’d purposely embarrassed Waverly just to get to her and she’s ashamed to admit just how much he did. She can freely admit she’s lost her heart to Waverly, but that meant nothing in the grand scheme of things. She was Champ’s.

 

…

 

 

The day had finally come when the Yukon had thawed enough for boats to safely set off to Dawson City. The town was electric with excitement and anticipation. Even Champ, who had all but skulked and complained the entire two months, had thrown himself into helping Jack and Nicolas prep and pack the boats. They drew straws to see who would have to split their load between boats and Champ had drawn the short one. He began to accuse them of cheating until Jack pointed out he was the first to pick his straw.

 

They had all agreed that Jack would be the lead and help guide both boats through the river. He’d done river guiding before so it was an obvious choice.

 

Jack had tried to convince Champ that Waverly would be safer if she rode in the lead boat with him, but Champ refused. He tried again with suggesting Champ ride with him and Waverly with Nicolas as he’d had some river experience as well, but Champ outright laughed at that idea. Even with Waverly trying to pull him away and explain to him privately how it was more practical to have experience in both boats, Champ remained unmoved.

 

“We could go to the Mounties. They’ll make him pick one or the other.” Jack suggests even though he knows it will really chap Champ’s hide if they did that and he’ll be more insufferable than he already is. Nicole just shrugs, silently leaving it up to him as he’s the more experienced of the two.

 

Finally, Jack sighs. “Let’s just wait and see then. There’s a tram people can take to bypass White Horse. It costs money, but we’ll tell Champ he _has_ to put Waverly on it or we go to the Mounties.”

 

“I’ll go tell him.” Nicole says as her eyes scan the area by the boats, looking for him.

 

…

 

“You certainly are sweet on her, aren’t ya?” Jack chuckles as he watches Nicolas’ head keep swiveling from bow to stern to the boat behind them after each wave that pushes even remotely close to the top of the gunwale.

 

“How do you know I’m not just worried about half my supplies being on that boat?” Nicole replies testily. It had been yet another capitulation to that imbecile that Nicole was getting tired of agreeing to, but she knew it would work better than threatening him with the Mounties.

 

“Well, I guess it could be one or the other, or both.” Jack muses aloud as he grins at his boat co-captain.

 

Normally Nicole would laugh off Jack’s imperturbable observations, but not today. They were on day three of their river journey and already she’s had to yell at Champ countless times to keep his boat in line with theirs, all the while trying to gauge how fearful Waverly’s expression is as she clutches to the starboard side of the boat as if she’s prepared to jump out and swim to shore at a moment’s notice.

 

“We should have put our foot down and had one of them ride with you or me.” She complains as she stands and waves at Champ, gesturing they have about another mile or less until they reach Canyon City where they’ll spend the night and hit White Horse rapids in the morning.

 

She folds the map up and stows it away before standing and moving to the port side of the boat to gather their fishing gear so they can drop some lines in as soon as they get to shore.

 

After that’s done, she joins Jack at the stern and relieves him of his rudder duties for a spell.

 

“When we get through White Horse I’m going to insist Waverly ride with you.” Nicole says resolutely and Jack just nods, turning to face the bow as a self-satisfied smirk runs over his lips.

 

 

After almost an hour of shouting directions repeatedly and exasperation on all sides, they get both boats secured to a little alcove a quarter mile downstream from Canyon City. The four of them unload what they need for the night and Nicole and Jack grab the fishing poles and get their lines in the water while Champ goes to find out where Waverly will take the tram past White Horse Rapids.

 

 

They convene a couple of hours later, with Jack and Nicolas catching enough fish for all. Nicole works side by side with Waverly, teaching her how to clean a fish, much to Champ’s consternation. When Nicole offers to step aside so he can teach her, he merely shakes his head, saying he’s lousy at it.

 

“Champ really isn’t all that bad when you get to know him. I think this whole trip has been really hard and…” Waverly starts but her voice dies off as her own words ring hollow even to her own ears.

 

Nicole watches her as she starts on her second fish, already picking up how to clean them with just one example. The brunette feels eyes on her and looks up into warm, brown eyes.

 

“How are you holding up? You don’t seem too keen to be floating down a giant river.” Nicole observes, her expression belaying her concern under her mild, teasing tone.

 

“Champ’s trying, he really is, but we’re carrying a ton of supplies and neither of us have boating experience.” She says, using a bit more force to cut off the fish’s head she’s been working on.

 

Nicole lays her hand on Waverly’s gently. “Hey, we gotta eat that, you know.” She says with a crooked, dimpled grin. Waverly sighs, smiling sadly at Nicole. She makes no move to slip her hand out from under the big strong one.

 

“After White Horse, I’m insisting you ride with Jack. I’ll help Champ out. I kind of have a vested interest in seeing that boat make it to Dawson City too, you know.” Nicole reminds with a knowing grin.

 

The look Waverly gives her makes Nicole want to lean down and cover her lips with her own and take her into her arms. Instead, she gathers the fillets and gestures for Waverly to grab the frying pan sitting near the fire.

 

“Let’s get these fried up. I’m starving.” She says lightly.

 

Waverly nods, swallowing a lump in her throat, not for the first time wondering what it would be like if her life was different and she’d grown up with Nicolas instead of Champ.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	7. White Horse/Canyon City

Waverly leans against a tree worrying her lips nervously as she watches the men pack up the supplies. She’d heard plenty of stories while around the large campfire the night before and she really wishes there was a way they could _all_ forgo the rapids in favor of the tram. She’d even asked Nicolas and he’d told her the tram was strictly for transporting women and children.

 

As she watches them going around and re-tying everything down and even putting on their life jackets (something none of the men did on the first leg of the trip) she feels a sense of dread.

 

Nicole looks up and sees her and is about to go talk to her when Champ pushes past her and goes to her. He gathers her up in his arms and Nicole looks away, busying herself with checking the rudder and oar latches.

 

“Don’t worry, Darlin’. I got the hang of this river thing now. I’ll be alright.” Champ says as he tilts her chin up to look in her eyes.

 

She is worried for him, for sure. He’s all she knows out here and she also hopes that once they get to Dawson, he’ll return back to the easy-going, charming man he was when they first started courting. When he leans down and presses a hard kiss to her mouth though, she tries to go back in her memory to the last time he was actually like that. She’s having a hard time.

 

“I’ll be through those rapids before you even have time to worry about me.” He says with a cocky grin.

 

Jack looks up and sees the exchange and then looks over to Nicolas who is still fiddling with the oar latches.

 

“Champ! Can you go find a Mountie and ask when we can set off?” He shouts over to him. He looks annoyed and about to protest, but Waverly grabs his arm and gives him a sweet smile.

 

“I don’t have to be on the tram for a while. I’ll be right here.” She says.

 

The moment he turns to leave, Jack walks over to Nicolas. “Go tell Mrs. Hardy we’ll do our best to make sure her thick headed husband makes it over the rapids.” Jack chuckles.

 

Nicole wastes no time in taking long strides to where the brunette is standing, satchel at her feet. Waverly’s eyes fall on the tall red-head as she makes her way up the bank towards her.

 

“Hi.” Waverly says, taking in the tall, soft-eyed man. She has rarely seen him without his wide-brimmed felt hat and has the urge to run her hands over his red hair that has grown considerably over the few months of their journey.

 

“How is it you have time to shave every day, but not get yourself a haircut?” Waverly giggles.

 

Nicole runs a hand over her jaw. _If you only knew, Waverly_. She just gives her a shrug and a crooked grin, commanding her heart rate to slow down at the brunette’s observation of her appearance.

 

“Not much opportunity out here.” She continues to grins, a bit self-conscious now. “Once I get into Dawson, I’ll get someone to cut it.” Nicole answers as she smoothes a few errant locks back. She swears Waverly looks like she wants to do it for her.

 

Nicole’s face turns serious though as she studies the brunette for a moment. “I’ll have Champ with me on the boat. I’ll make sure he gets through.” She says with a nod.

 

“I just hope he listens to you and is a help, not a hindrance.” Waverly sighs.

 

Nicole cannot resist holding her tongue and she ducks her head conspiratorially. “I have half a mind just to tie him to the boat on top of the sacks of flour.”

 

Waverly gives an honest to goodness laugh and Nicole’s heart trips over itself at the sound. She wants to say things that get Waverly to laugh like that more than she’s wanted anything in that moment.

 

“Waverly! What’s going on? What’s so funny?” Champ barks as he makes his way down back to them. His face is a tight scowl and Waverly rolls her eyes.

 

“We’re just chatting, Champ.” Waverly says, exasperated. She’s had enough of his territorial attitude.

 

He ignores her and squares his shoulders at Nicole. “Mountie says we can leave any time we like.” He says, standing halfway between her and Waverly.

 

“I’ll go tell Jack. We push off in five minutes.” Nicole says and looks back to Waverly. She dips her head and offers her a dimpled grin. She can practically hear Champ’s back teeth cracking as his jaw clamps in fury.

 

“See you on the other side, Waverly.” Nicole says jovially and with that, she turns on her heel and heads back to the boat with a smirk on her lips.

 

 

…

 

 

 

“This ain’t so bad.” Champ says with an over-confident huff as he mans the oars, something he insisted on doing for the first part. Nicole rolls her eyes at him. They haven’t even reached the start of the first drop that will bring them into swift water.

 

She watches as Jack navigates the boat all the way right and she calls to Champ to double time his rowing so she can get in line with him.

 

“Not too fast, we don’t want to run up on him.” She says as she pulls the rudder towards the port side.

 

“Wasn’t gonna, geez.” She hears Champ grump.

 

“Let’s switch.” Nicole calls to him. She’d told him she’d take the oars and he’d take the rudder once they approach the rapids.

 

“I got it.” He calls back in clipped tone.

 

She knows once they hit the rapids they’ll be no switching. She’s got to convince him to move.

 

“Champ. I need you to take the rudder. You’re stronger and can handle it easier.” She tries to stroke his ego, but he just turns around.

 

“Well, then I should be on the oars then. There’s two of ‘em!” He says. The water is getting swifter and she’s running out of time.

 

“Champ, I have more experience, let me take the oars, damnit.” She gets up and stands behind him. She’s about to shove him out of the way when they hit a large boulder hidden beneath the swift water. Nicole pitches over, nearly falling out of the boat. Champ looks back at her, eyes as wide as saucers.

 

“Here, take the oars.” He says, scrambling behind her and leaving the oars hanging in their latches. One of them slips out before Nicole can catch it.

 

“Goddamnit, Champ!” She yells as she leans over to try and grab it before it’s swept away. She reaches for it and they are pitched again and Nicole goes tumbling into their supplies, smacking her head on the corner of a crate, the oar gone.

 

She rights herself and grabs the one remaining one and shouts at Champ. “Tie yourself to the boat with some rope and get back on that rudder! Pull it the direction I tell you too. Remember, the pulling is the _opposite_ of the direction we need to go!” She yells to be heard over the now raging river. “If I yell right, you pull it left! You understand?” She continues to shout, trying to keep an eye on Jack in front of them and back at an obviously terrified Champ as she feels what she knows is blood trickling down the side of her face.

 

“DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!” Nicole yells back and he finally gives her a shaky head nod. _He’s gonna kill us both_ , she thinks grimly.

 

She turns back, ties herself to the boat and grabs the oar, praying they make it to the other side in one piece.

 

 

…

 

 

Once the tram makes a turn away from the river and it is no longer visible, Waverly takes out her knitting kit that she secretly purchased while at Lake Bennett. She knew they’d need things to keep them warm and figures she could start on knitting a blanket and be mostly done with it by the time they got to Dawson City.

 

She works on it a good hour and a half before taking a break and bringing her eyes up to look around at the breathtaking scenery. _It really is truly spectacular up here_ , she muses as she marvels at the sheer mountains, covered in pristine snow and giant evergreens. The sky is cloudless and brilliantly blue and the air smells and tastes so sweet and clean.

 

The knitting and views had taken her mind off of the men and wondering how they were faring for a while, but now she thinks about them. She is confident in Jack’s abilities to guide and Nicole’s abilities too and she hopes that Champ is actually trying to learn something from them. She imagines the rapids are a bit of trial by fire though and she worries it might just be too much for her husband and that would make it that much harder for Nicolas.

 

She wishes she could have properly said good luck or something. Before Champ interrupted them, she was going to tell Nicolas to be careful. She frowns in guilt at the thought. She’s married to Champ and here she is upset he interrupted her and Nicolas.

 

She hadn’t had much energy to ponder what it was about the tall red-headed man that had her so… interested? She just knew she really enjoyed his company. He was so kind, attentive. Always interested in what she had to say and asked questions that mattered. He acted like a best friend would act, like her childhood friend, Chrissy. But she never found herself looking at Chrissy and thinking what soft, kind eyes she had, or how her chin was strong or how she wanted to run her hands through her hair… She’d never even really thought about those things with Champ all that much beyond when he first began courting her. It seemed that once they consummated their marriage, he had stopped showing much interest in her besides what she could do for him.

 

Perhaps that would be what Nicolas would be like too, if they were married instead. She blushes at the thought briefly and then smiles slowly, strongly suspecting it would be different with him. She’d always felt familiar with Champ, she knew what to expect out of him and that was a certain sense of comfort. But in the few months she’s interacted with Nicolas, she’d began to feel a combination of _excitement_ and comfort. It felt very different than what she felt with Champ, even right in the beginning.

 

She sighs deeply though, shaking her head and clearing those types of thoughts out of her mind. She was married to Champ and not much was going to change that.

 

She looks up when she feels the tram come to a slow stop. She gathers her belongings and makes her way towards the door. Upon stepping down, her attention is drawn to a large commotion near the riverbanks. She feels her stomach drop and begins to push her way through the quickly forming crowd.

 

_“I heard they drowned….”_

 

_“The whole boat broke apart!”_

 

_“Get some rope!”_

_“There’s one of ‘em! Grab him!”_


	8. Canyon City p2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't get used to updates every day. Thought I'd put you out of your misery this one time.

Nicole turns around on the front thwart and locks eyes with Jack for a frantic second as she tries pushing their boat to the shore as hard as she can once the oar touched bottom. “Can you guys make it?” Jack shouts over the roar of the water.

 

His question is swallowed by the rushing river as he watches Nicolas and Champ still struggling together to make their way out of the swift current and into the smooth shallows of the bank. Finally, Nicole hears the bottom of the boat scrape as Champ tosses a line to one of the men near shore.

 

Jack had ended up behind them when Champ had dropped the oar and they had spun around, out of control and at the mercy of the rapids until Nicole’s quick thinking righted them and saved them from certain death. Jesop and Clem had got caught up in it too, but they hadn’t been so lucky.

 

Nicole hastily grabs the extra rope she had tied off at the bow of the ship and ties it around her waist and tosses the rest on shore to the men that were rushing down to help as Jack and Champ scramble to secure both the boats.

 

“There’s one of ‘em! Grab him!” A man near the top of the bank shouts as he points, but Nicole had already spotted him.

 

Waverly breaks through the crowd just as she sees Nicolas scramble to the bow of their boat and dive straight into the rapids. Her heart jumps in her throat as her hand goes to her mouth and her eyes round in terror.

 

She watches anxiously as she sees his pop up near a man, face down in the water. She lets out the breath she was holding as she sees the men on shore pulling them in by the rope as Nicolas clings to the unconscious man, who Waverly now sees isn’t Champ or Jack to her infinite relief. She loses sight of them as they are pulled up to shore and everyone gathers around the fallen man.

 

“Clem and Jesop.” She hears Champ say as he comes up behind her, his voice devoid of emotion but his eyes are sad. “They broke up not more than ten feet from us and got caught in some rocks. We tried to grab them both as they shook loose, but we lost sight of Jesop.”

 

“I thought it was one of…” She says, turning to hug him in pure relief. She then turns to the commotion and continues to watch. She feels Champ put a hand on her shoulder.

 

“Should have seen me out there, Waves. I single-handedly saved our skin.”

 

She looks away from the scene in front of her to look at Champ incredulously. “I’m glad you guys are okay, but two men lost everything, including perhaps their lives and you’re bragging about your new boating skills?” She shakes her head in disbelief as he takes a breath to defend himself.

 

“I’m gonna see if I can help.” She says in an exasperated, clipped tone, ignoring his whiny calls for her to come back.

 

 

Nicole sits back on her haunches, not sure what else she can do for Clem. Two other men take over turning him on his side, clapping him on the back, trying to get him to cough up the water in his lungs. Nicole watches helplessly as she begins to shiver uncontrollably.

 

“Hey, let’s get you near a fire.” Jack says, joining the scene once he’d secured the boats. Nicole nods numbly and stands, stumbling up the bank.

 

“Nicolas.” It comes out more of a relieved breath than anything and Nicole looks up to see a very concerned Waverly scanning her from head to toe.

 

“He needs a blanket and get him next to a fire. Get those wet clothes off too.” Jack says, his voice cracking with emotion. He looks on with concern as Waverly leads him to the nearest fire.

 

“That is one brave son of a bitch.” One of the old-timers croaks out as he watches the tall, slip of a man get sat by the fire. Jack grunts in agreement.

 

“All for not, I’m afraid. That man he pulled out ain’t take no breath. I think he’s dead.” He hums thoughtfully as he continues to look at Nicolas. “Make sure to take a quick collection, get that man a hot meal and bath tonight.”

 

“Will do, Sir. Will do.” Jack says as he heads up to his friend.

 

He hangs back a bit as he watches Waverly take care of him, pulling the blanket up around his shoulders and inspecting his head wound that is still bleeding something fierce. She pulls out a handkerchief from her pocket and presses it lightly to the wound, making Nicolas wince a bit.

 

He tears his eyes away from them and sees Champ heading their way, eyes mere slits. Jack jogs over to intercept him.

 

“Help me pitch Nicolas’ tent will ya.” He says and has to grab Champ to get him to halt and listen.

 

“You do it.” Champ growls. Jack tightens his grip and gets near the man’s ear.

 

“Listen you sniveling, lily-white coward. I’ll tell this whole camp the way _you_ nearly capsized your own boat on account of your stupidity. How it was _also_ _you_ that made Clem and Jesop veer left and get caught up on those rocks in the first place.” Jack whispers, low and menacing.

 

“Now, unless you want to sew up the wound Nicolas has on his head because of _you_ too, I’d suggest you do the man a favor and pitch his tent while your wife helps him. After all she owes him for your life too.” Jack finishes loud enough to make Champ cringe and look around furtively.

 

Jack takes a defensive stance, ready to wrestle the man to the ground but Champ just visibly deflates and shrugs past him, going to the boats. Jack looks over at Waverly who seems to have witnessed the whole exchange sans the words and when Jack begins to get a look of contriteness on his face Waverly gives him a brilliant, grateful smile and then immediately goes back to tending to Nicolas.

 

“Hmm, seems Mrs. Hardy is sweet on Nicolas too.” Jack chuckles to himself.

 

 

“Nicolas, we need to get you out of these wet clothes.” Waverly says as her fingers open up the blanket a bit and she begins to undo the buttons on her outer wool shirt. She quickly brings her fingers up, stopping Waverly’s progress.

 

“I can do it.” She gets out hoarsely as her teeth chatter away. She keeps the blanket on as long as she can and slides out of her suspenders and attempts to unbutton her shirt. Waverly gingerly brushes them away when she sees he cannot even grip the button.

 

Nicole sucks in a breath, terrified of being discovered. She hopes Waverly doesn’t insist on her undershirt or she’s done for.

 

“Here’s a change of clothes for you.” Jack says as he lays them next to Nicolas. “We filled up a tub of hot water, over in the bathhouse there. Go get yerself warmed up.” He smiles as Waverly takes the set of clothes and begins to help Nicolas up.

 

“Thanks, but I got it.” Nicole says with a wane smile and stands up, giving the blanket back to Waverly.

 

Waverly looks on in concern until Nicolas has made it into the building. “He needs that wound cleaned and dressed.” Says, eyes not leaving the bathhouse door.

 

“I’ll get you my medical kit.” Jack says and hurries off.

 

…

 

Nicole sinks as low as she can into the water, finally feeling her bones start to thaw, followed by muscle and skin. There’s a light knock on the door and she begins to panic. There was no lock on the door.

 

“Someone’s in here!” She yells in as gruff a voice as she can muster.

 

“It’s me Nicolas. I came to fetch your pants so I can hang them by the fire.” Waverly calls through the door. Nicole looks to see where she’d set her clothes, relieved to see they are between her and the door.

 

She hunches over as much as she can to hide her parts and calls over her shoulder for her to come in.

 

She hears the door creak open and close quickly and she turns just barely to see Waverly standing there letting her eyes adjust to the inside as it was incredibly bright out.

 

“Uh, pants are right there on the chair. Thank you.” She says, staying stock-still. She knows Waverly won’t come much closer on account of propriety but still, she’s petrified Waverly will see the slender slope of her shoulders, or…

 

“You need anything else, Nicolas?” Waverly asks as she takes a step forward and leans over to gather her clothes.

 

“No, just thawing out. I’ll be out in a few.” She says, not wanting to be rude, but needing Waverly to leave.

 

“Okay. Come to our camp when your done and I’ll stitch your wound for you.” She says and before Nicole can turn and say any more, Waverly is out the door. Nicole sees she’s taken all of her clothes and suddenly she pales as she realizes her peeing contraption was in her pants.

 

She jumps from the bath and barely dries herself off in her rush to get dressed and intercept her before she lays her clothes out. She nearly slips as she runs the towel over her shoulders but stops as she sees the contraption sitting under the chair, seemingly having fallen out. She sits down, breathing heavily as she wills her heart to calm down. She chuckles uncomfortably and leans down to pick it up, securing it in Jack’s pants he’s lent to her. _Don’t forget to take it out when you give ‘em back_. She chides herself with a self-deprecating smile.

 

She goes back to the water and feels it’s still pretty warm. She lays the towel back out and slides back in with a hearty sigh.

 

 

 

Half an hour later, Nicole is feeling infinitely better. Warm and dry, she sits patiently as Waverly carefully stitches her head wound and puts a clean bandage on it. The proximity of the woman warms Nicole in all the right places and she feels her face flush as she feels Waverly’s skirt brush against the fabric of Jack’s borrowed thin cotton pants and Waverly’s hand, softly grasping her jaw to keep her face steady as she works the needle through her skin as quickly and gently as she can.

 

“You okay? Doesn’t hurt too bad?” Waverly asks as her brows knit together in concern.

 

“Nope, still a bit numb from the snow.” Nicole reassures. Waverly had thought to press some fresh snow to the wound to keep it from swelling too bad and slow the blood flow to make it easier to make the stitches closer together.

 

When she’s all done stitching and dressing the wound, she pats Nicolas’ face tenderly. “There you go. Hopefully it won’t scar too bad.”

 

“Thanks for fixing me up, Waverly.” Nicole smiles, grateful.

 

“Least I could do. You were so brave, Nicolas.” She says, her voice filled with wonder and something else Nicole can’t quite name.

 

“I just wish I could have saved him. And poor Jesop. Hope they recover him downstream.” Nicole says, eyes downcast in sadness and guilt.

 

Waverly starts to ask about what exactly happened, but stops herself. She knows Nicolas is too nice to give her the truth, especially if Champ was somehow involved. She will ask Jack later.

 

 

While Nicole continues sitting by the fire, one of the owners of the small inn in Canyon City brings over some roasted chicken and potatoes. She can’t believe it and thinks there’s some mistake.

 

“Acts of bravery aren’t common here in this place where it’s usually every man for himself. Nice to be reminded there’s still men out there like you.” The portly woman says with a wide smile.

 

Nicole takes the plate handed to her, but frowns. “I didn’t even save him, ma’am.”

 

“You risked your life to try.” She notes with a knowing nod. “Now eat that up while it’s still warm.” She squeezes her shoulder and gives her a fond smile before making her way back.

 

“Huh.” She shrugs, surprised and warmed by the thoughtfulness. She looks up to see Jack and Waverly looking at her with warm smiles and Champ sitting directly opposite her, scowling.

 

She leans over and grabs her celebratory bottle of beer that Jack bought a round of on account of them making it through with their skin and supplies. She raises it in the air and the others do the same.

 

“To Clem and Jesop, may they find fields of gold in the Ever After.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ya'll thought I was going to kill Champ, huh? 
> 
> Don't worry, he won't be a factor toooo much longer. Waste of skin, this dude.


	9. Decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, well, well. Had some time to write last night. The chapter you've been waiting for!

Nicole wakes up well before the sun and realizes her body is on fire. She’s wheezing and her throat feels like it’s been turned inside out.

 

She clumsily gets up, not even bothering to rewrap her breasts and stumbles out of her tent to retrieve her clothes that had been drying by the fire all night. The frigid night air feels like heaven and she stands for a few minutes, soaking it in. She lifts her hand slightly and stares at it, marveling at the steam swirling and curling from her dangerously overheated skin and disappearing into the waning moonlit night.

 

 

When she feels she can no longer stand upright, she grabs her clothes and then stumbles back to her tent and collapses, the energy it took to even do that simple task wiping her out.

 

 

…

 

 

“Jack, can you go check on Nicolas? He hasn’t made it out of his tent and we’re due to set off this afternoon.” Waverly asks when she sees the man on his way to the outhouse.

 

He veers over to Nicolas’ and peeks his head in. He sees him on top of his bedroll in just his long underwear that are drenched with sweat and from what he can see of his face, extremely pale. He crouches down to shake his foot and all she can manage is a pained groan.

 

“Hey buddy, you don’t look so good.” Jack says with sympathy and a bit of disappointment. Nicolas isn’t going anywhere today.

 

…

 

 

Nicole wakes with a start when she feels someone touching her. She nearly turns around when she realizes her breasts are unwrapped. She must have flung it off in her fever state.

 

“I’ll go get you some water, huh?” Jack says and Nicole just nods, staying on her stomach, waiting until he slips out to clumsily pull her wrap on as fast as her ailing body will let her and slide on her undershirt and her lighter cotton shirt on account of her fever.

 

She doesn’t have the energy or time to get fully dressed before he’s back again with a cup of water.

 

“Thanks.” She croaks and takes the cup from the hand pushing through the flaps. She sees it is not Jack’s hand though and in the next instant she’s staring up into Waverly’s very worried soft, hazel eyes. Not that Waverly would even look, she pulls her pants over her long john bottoms to hide the absence of a bulge that would be obvious in the thin underwear.

 

“You’ve caught sick, haven’t you?” She pulls at her lips with her teeth and leans in to touch Nicole’s forehead. “You’re burning up.” She states. “I’m gonna go to the inn to see if they have anything.” She says quickly and is out of the tent before Nicole can say a word.

 

She drains the cup of water and pulls on the rest of her clothes. Trying to stand is a bad idea however and she topples over and begins a deep heaving coughing fit.

 

“Goddamnit, I got no time for this.” She groans.

 

 

 

Waverly returns twenty minutes or so later with another cup and a hesitant expression.

 

“The inn’s owner said this concoction will help with the fever. Some first nation packers traded it for some furs and… well, she said it tastes like a sweaty mule’s hind parts, but…” Waverly just gives her a small smile and pushes the cup towards her.

 

“Such a ringing endorsement, Mrs. Hardy. Can’t wait.” Nicole deadpans and then manages a weak smile of thanks as she takes the cup, sniffs it and then puts it to her lips and drains it.

 

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph that was horrible.” Nicole grimaces as she hands the cup back to Waverly. She lies back down and tries to take a deep breath but is again overcome with a wet, hoarse cough.

 

“Well, we aren’t hitting the river at least until that fever breaks.” Waverly nods assuredly. She looks at Nicole for a bit longer. “I’m going to bring in some cool rags. I’ll tell Jack and Champ we’ll leave tomorrow, maybe the day after.” She says and again slips out before Nicole can argue. _I’ll just sleep for a few hours and then I should be okay to go_ , she thinks. She closes her eyes and in moments, falls into deep sleep.

 

 

Nicole awakes a few hours later. It’s dusk and she knows they’ve lost their window to launch for the day. She tries to get her elbows under her to sit up, but everything aches so badly. Her throat is still raw and her head is pounding. She then notices two other things: Something cold wrapped around her head and feet and voices outside her tent, low but angry.

 

“We can’t wait. There’s only a few claims left! If we don’t get up there, we could be shit out of luck!”

 

She recognizes that voice as Champ’s.

“Well we can’t just leave him here sick and he's in no shape to travel yet.” She hears Jack try and reason with him.

 

“We don’t owe him nothing! We set out on our own, we are responsible for our own!” Champ whisper-shouts.

 

There are a few seconds of silence and either they’ve said their piece or they’ve walked away. Moments later though, her tent flaps are pulled back and Waverly appears with another cup.

 

“Oh, please, no.” Nicole says, visibly shrinking away from Waverly and the cup and it makes Waverly giggle.

 

“Just some honest to goodness broth from the inn’s kitchen, promise.” She says and sits across from Nicole in the small tent, mindful not to get too close.

 

Even though it takes more effort than she’d like, Nicole sits up and gingerly takes the cup and Waverly takes the opportunity to feel Nicole’s forehead. Nicole closes her eyes at the feeling of her cool, soft hand against her heated skin.

 

“Fever’s gone down.” She says as she brings her hand to her lap.

 

“I still feel like I’ve been run over by a wagon train, twice.” Nicole rasps as she slowly sips the tepid broth, wincing as it goes down. Waverly frowns at that and Nicole is quick to add that she’ll be fine to leave tomorrow morning.

 

“We’ll leave when you are up to it.” Waverly assures. “Now let me check your head wound. You’ve messed up the bandage.” She chides softly. Nicole holds still while she unwraps it, produces some sort of ointment from her pocket and rewraps it with a handkerchief she also has in her pocket. “I think all this fever has infected your wound some. This should help.” She says as she pats the ointment that is back in her pocket.

 

“Well, you’d make a fine nurse, Mrs. Hardy.” Nicole says and Waverly blushes.

 

“Waverly! Where are you?” They both hear Champ shout and Nicole has to stifle a grin when Waverly rolls her eyes.

 

“I’ll come check on you in a bit.” She says and makes her way out of the tent with a sigh.

 

…

 

“I’m leaving tomorrow in the morning, with or without you and Nicolas.” Champ says over the campfire. Jack gets up and begins to pace. He doesn’t want to miss his chance either, but he’s not the kind of man to abandon his friends and he considers Nicolas a good one.

 

“You have half his stuff on the boat, a boat he more than helped build.” Jack reminds him.

 

“I’ll get my own then.” Champ spits and with Waverly and Jack looking on slack-jawed, he gets up and heads to the makeshift general store and trading post.

 

“Is he… will Nicolas be ready to go tomorrow?” Jack turns and asks Waverly.

 

“I don’t know. He can barely stand on his own. I think pushing him for tomorrow could lead to pneumonia or..”

 

Jack nods slowly and sits back down, his face contemplative. He finishes his supper and fills a cup of water and tells Waverly he’s going to go check on Nicolas.

 

Waverly smiles and gets up to clean the dishes, her appetite gone.

 

…

 

Nicole wakes up with the sun and wants to cry in frustration when she tries to roll over and immediately begins to dry heave as her head pounds mercilessly. She manages to grab a rag as her stomach empties what little it has in it: some broth that Waverly had brought in last night, water and stomach bile.

 

She lies there panting, just wanting to cry. Suddenly, the flaps of her tent are flung back and Champ’s face appears.

 

“I got my own boat and we’re ready to go. You comin’?” He asks tersely. Nicole squints at the sun directly over his shoulder and puts her hand up to shield her face. She tries to shuffle up to her knees but is having difficulty maintaining balance.

 

“We leave in an hour.” He says, not waiting to hear an answer.

 

Nicole’s head is swimming as it tries to catch up with what Champ just said. She gathers any reserves she has and gets dressed, pulls on her coat, hat and boots and heads out of her tent.

 

 

Jack sees her first and his eyes flash with concern that Nicole sees is beyond what state she must look in.

 

“He’s planning on going without a guide when I said I’d wait for you.” Jack says, clearly upset.

 

“We still have Five Finger rapids to get through. No way he can get him and Waverly through that by himself.” Nicole realizes. She looks for the nearest place to sits and collapses down on it.

 

“You obviously are in no shape to leave today either.” Jack says.

 

“Look, I don’t want to keep you from going.” Nicole says, her eyes heavy and her breathing labored.

 

“There’s no way he can man that boat himself, with his gear and Waverly. He’s gone and done a very stupid thing by getting his own boat. I won’t be a party to it.” Jack replies, anger evident. “And Waverly, she knows it’s irresponsible as well. She’s scared to death to go without you.” He says after a beat, looking Nicole in the eyes.

 

Truth is, she’d get on the boat half dead to keep Waverly safe. But now Champ has gone and got another boat, spreading the manpower too thin.

 

“I don’t care if he is her husband, we can’t let her get on that boat.” Nicole rasps out as another fit of coughing hits.

 

“Come on, let’s get you back to your tent.”

 

“I need to see Waverly, I need to tell her…” Nicole gets out before Jack guides her to her bedroll where she collapses in a heap.

 

“I’ll take care of it, Nicolas.” Jack soothes the ailing man.

 

…

 

 

“Champ, we should at least wait for a guide to take us through.” Waverly frets as she watches Champ from the shore. She can’t believe he’s doing this, willing to ditch what’s left of their group after all they’ve done for them.

 

“We wait any more, we might as well just pack up and go home! You want that Waverly? Huh? Go back to daddy’s homestead and have me work as his ranch hand the rest of my life? No way am I going back to that!” Champ shouts to her as he continues to check to see everything is tied down.

 

“Now get in the goddamn boat!” He roars, finally standing up and looking at her. She shrinks back at his tone, but stands there on the shore unsure what to do. It feels so wrong leaving Nicolas. It feels wrong to set out on their own.

 

“Champ!” She hears Jack yell over her shoulder. Champ straightens and regards the man as his anger and annoyance at Waverly turns into something else.

 

“Did you tell Waverly what really happened to Clem and Jesop? How you wouldn’t move off the oars until Nicolas made you and then you panicked and dropped one? Did you tell her how even then you didn’t follow Nicolas’ instructions and caused Clem and Jesop’s boat to crash into the rocks?” He is shouting this loud enough for anyone near to hear. Each word makes Champ shrink down into the boat more and more.

 

“And you didn’t even have the decency to own up to it. Your stupidity cost men their lives and you want to take your wife out alone?” He laughs humorlessly.

 

Waverly just looks from Jack to Champ in disbelief. She feels sick and angry all at the same time. She knew Champ could be stubborn sometimes and selfish, but this…

 

So she makes a decision.

 

“Champ, I want my belongings. I’m going to be staying here.” She says quietly but with conviction. She can’t believe she’s having to choose between her own safety and her husband.

 

“He’s lying, Waverly!” Champ says as he climbs out of the boat. He goes to her, eyes large and pleading, ignoring Jack as he reaches for her hands. “I’m your husband, you’re my wife.” He says it with such disingenuous softness it physically makes her ill. As if that’s all it should take to risk her life so frivolously. She pulls her hands back, really seeing her husband for who he really is.

 

“I may be your wife, but I believe what Jack says. If you loved me you wouldn’t force me to go on a boat with you knowing full well you have no idea what you are doing!” Her words go from measured to unrelenting anger and by the end of them, she’s shaking with fury and disbelief.

 

“Listen, you are my WIFE! You will not stay here with the likes of that pansy-assed…” Is all Champ gets out before Jack punches him hard in the mouth. Champ stumbles back, loses his footing and falls all the way down the bank into the icy cold river.

 

He looks up at both of them, stunned with his mouth full of blood. Then his face contorts into rage as he slogs out of the muddy bank and starts towards Jack and Waverly.

 

“Son, you can take your ass, your supplies and your boat out right now, but you ain’t taking this lady with you.” A deep booming voice comes out of nowhere. All three look up to see there’s a small crowd formed. The voice they realize belongs to a Mountie with a stern brow and bushy mustache that looks like he weighs as much as Jack and Champ combined.

 

“She’s my…” Champ begins to defend weakly but is cut off.

 

“I don’t care who she is. She’ll be escorted safely through to Dawson City and meet up with you then.” He tells Champ in a way that leads no room for further argument.

 

“Now get the lady’s belongings out of your boat and up on the shore.” He commands.

 

Jack smirks when Champ scrambles up into the boat and starts untying Waverly’s things and tossing them to shore. Waverly watches silently as she tries to wrap her mind around what has just happened. What will she do now that she’s pretty much on her own?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thanks to all that have been commenting saying they enjoy this story! I read every one of them. Some of them are downright funny!


	10. Five Finger Rapids

Nicole wakes to a soft, melodic voice. _Am I dead? Is that an angel?_ She wonders as she slowly opens her eyes. _Waverly_ , her mind sighs. _Waverly singing_.

The singing stops however when Nicole opens her eyes and focuses on the brunette sitting near her head. She fights a smile as she swallows to ready her voice to speak.

 

“What day is it?” She asks, pleased to feel that her throat is no longer feeling like sandpaper. She’s still dead tired and achy, but she definitely feels the worst is behind her.

 

“It’s Sunday.” Waverly says just as Nicole notices Waverly’s hand in hers. She looks only a bit better than Nicole feels.

 

“I’m sorry I was out so long. Champ and Jack must be chomping at the bit to go.” She begins to sit up although she’s reluctant to let go of Waverly’s hand. Waverly slowly pulls it back anyway and looks as if she’s about to cry.

 

“What’s wrong? What happened?” Nicole asks as she sits up fully.

 

“Champ wouldn’t wait. He took off two days ago.” She says, sniffling and wiping her eyes. Nicole would be lying if she said she wasn’t relieved Waverly didn’t go with him, and not only for the brunette’s safety.

 

“And you?” Nicole asks tentatively.

 

“Jack told me the truth about Champ. About how he not only got Clem and Jesop killed, he almost crashed your boat as well.” Waverly says, eyes dropping to her lap as she takes a deep breath, letting it out with a sigh. She then looks up at Nicole, composing herself with a small smile. “Jack and one of the Mounties made the decision pretty easy for me by forbidding Champ to take me.”

 

“Not that you couldn’t make your own decision, but had I been there, I would have done the same.” Nicole promises.

 

“How is it that you, a man I met only months ago has more interest in my safety and well-being than my own husband? Cares what I feel, think…” She trails off, sensing she’s heading into woefully inappropriate thoughts and ideas. Nicolas is not her husband. She’s still married and has plans to meet up with Champ when they all get to Dawson. But she knows when she sees him again, she’ll have another decision to make about their future. She’s gotten a glimpse with Nicolas on what a real relationship might be like. She’s not sure she can ever go back to what she and Champ had.

 

She shakes her head and lets out a small laugh. “At any rate, I guess you are stuck with me because Jack insisted we all carry on together. He even hired a guide so we can all feel more at ease, especially with you still recovering. Something we tried to get Champ to do, but he refused.” She shakes her head.

 

“I’d be more than happy to have you accompany us on the rest of the journey. I just need a short spell to get myself together and we can talk about when to launch.” Nicole says, willing herself to rally so they could get on with their journey.

 

…

 

They are able to take off that very afternoon after Jack and Waverly helped Nicole pack up her gear. Jack and Waverly rode in one boat while Nicole and the guide rode in the other, this time Nicole’s boat in the lead. They’d decided on pushing through overnight to pick up some time with each person taking a turn at the oars.

 

Nicole was a bit apprehensive when she saw Jack hunched over the oars, explaining to Waverly how to keep the boat nice and straight. The river at this point was pretty easy moving and they wouldn’t hit Five Fingers until later the next day.

 

Nicole smiles as she leans atop one of the sacks of flour, watching as Waverly expertly corrects the boat ever so often until the redhead drifts off to sleep.

 

…

 

As romantic at heart as Jack is, he’s never really believed in the type of love he’s read in books. He always assumed that that type of instant, deep connection had simply come from authors’ most idyllic visions of being in love, not the reality of it.

 

He’d never witnessed anything like he sees happening between Nicolas and Waverly. To be in the same proximity as the two was to feel like an intruder on private moments.

 

He does hope that the two can see themselves together somehow. Waverly certainly deserves more than Champ, and Nicolas is as fine a man as he’s come across.

 

His thoughts are interrupted when he hears a tiny yelp followed by a small splash and he looks towards the bank where he heard the noise, but sees nothing. He shrugs and resets his oars, facing forward again. Then he feels something bump the boat ever so gently and leans over to see a pup riding the current with his head barely above water.

 

“Hey, fella, what in the world?” He wonders in surprise as he leans over and grabs the poor thing by the scruff before he goes under again.

 

“Where did you come from?” He looks back to where he heard the splash, but can’t see anything. By this time Waverly wakes at the small commotion

 

“Everything okay, Jack?” She asks as she sits up and yawns.

 

“Yeah, but we have a passenger.” He says with a chuckle, turning and showing Waverly the pup. She of course coos loudly and quickly rummages through their things for a cloth to wrap him up in.

 

“How?” She asks as she takes the pup from him and wraps him up, trying to dry him best she can as he whimpers and shivers.

 

“I think I heard him fall in upstream a ways and somehow the current carried him right up against our boat.” He says, getting a good look at him now that his fur is somewhat dry.

 

“Wolf pup?” She asks as she extends him out from her body, her hands securely under his front legs, studying him He yips at her as if telling her to bring him back in against her.

 

“I’d say so.” He says laughing at the wild dog’s protests.

 

She brings him closer in and begins to inspect an area around his neck. “Looks like he’s been injured by something.” She says with a frown. She pulls apart his fur to see it better. She sees what look like four puncture wounds. Not too deep, but definitely not from what a mother wolf would inflict. She finds a scrap of fabric and wraps it around the little guy’s neck just tight enough to slow the bleeding.

 

Waverly steadily makes her way towards the bow of the boat and holds the pup up, calling to Nicolas.

 

Both Jack and Waverly laugh when they see his eyes go round in surprise and then confusion.

 

…

 

“She tied in?” Jack hears Nicolas ask from his spot on the rear thwart as he takes command of the rudder.

 

“Of course she is, Nicolas!” Jack calls back as he shakes his head. He nods to Waverly who has donned her life jacket, making sure it’s nice and snug. She smiles at Jack when he rolls his eyes at his friend. “You ready, Waverly?” He asks, serious now. The rapids aren’t near as treacherous as the White Horse rapids, but they still require quite a bit of skillful navigation. He’s been practicing with Waverly on the rudder on the smoother parts of the river and feels she’s going to be able to handle it when they get into the swift water.

 

“Yep, just gotta remember right is left and left is right.” She grins with only mild trepidation and Jack makes his way over to her and gives her shoulder a reassuring squeeze.

 

“You’ll do fine. You seem to pick up the rowing easily so the rudder should be no problem. I’ll make it easy and yell which direction to pull instead of the direction we’ll go in, okay?”

 

She nods and takes a firmer grip on the handle.

 

“Remember, nice and easy pull unless I tell you ‘hard’. Then jerk the sucker for all it’s worth.” He instructs with a half smile.

 

“Got it, Jack.”

 

“Hopefully Nicolas can concentrate on his own boat and not be looking back here making sure I don’t pull us asunder.” He chuckles as Waverly gives him a shy smile.

 

He gets set on the oars and ties himself in as well.

 

“Here we go!” He shouts with excitement as they hit the first narrow chute.

 

Waverly gasps at the first drop and panics slightly when the river begins really picking up speed. She watches as Jack half stands to get the boat back in line with the current. She holds the rudder steady until she hears him bark out “Right!” and she’s on it quickly as Jack turns and gives her proud smile and nod.

 

 

Once they get past the first chute, he turns and tells Waverly they’ll just follow Nicolas and the guide’s line and Waverly nods.

 

They hit the next narrow chute and it is much faster and steeper and Waverly loses her breath for a second. “Left! Hard!” She hears Jack yell and does as told, eyes wide as she feels the boat creak under the stress. Water comes up over the bow and her feet are now submerged in the frigid water. She barely has time to register that as they are hit full on by a large port side wave as they descend another chute.

 

“Ah! That’s refreshing!” Jack exclaims with a loud, boisterous laugh that actually puts her at ease. Even though she’s freezing and knows her hand will be sore for a week from gripping the rudder handle, she lets herself enjoy the ride, giggling when she feels her stomach drop.

 

She doesn’t have much opportunity to look up at Nicolas’ boat, but when she does pick up her head and look around Jack, she sees Nicolas looking back at her. During a slight break in the hard, fast current, she gives him a big smile and a wave. She swears she can see him grinning in relief and it make her heart beat just a little bit faster than it already is.

 

 

There are a couple of harrowing moments when Waverly is convinced they’ll pitch overboard, but Jack always knows the right move to bring the boat back in line. When the last of the white water is behind them and the river becomes wide and slow, the rudders are tied up and they again take turns at the oars until they find a good spot to camp for the night.

 

Nicole still isn’t a hundred per cent, but she helps off-load what they’ll need for the night and goes into the woods to collect firewood, and of course to relieve herself in private.

 

When she returns she sees the guide has already made his bedroll and is out like a light.

“Not much for company, that one.” Jack muses. “Just inhaled a tin of jerky, a can of beans, half a pint of whiskey and threw his bedroll out and fell asleep.” He chuckles.

 

“Well, he’s a good guide. Knows this river like the back of his hand. I guess that’s all that counts, huh?” Nicole shrugs.

 

Both Jack and Nicole pitch in to help prepare dinner to Waverly’s relief. She found them to be pretty sufficient around a pot and pan and soon they were sitting down to some beans, biscuits and some dried beef, which of course Jack alternates feeding himself and the pup with.

 

“See, us men know a thing or two about cooking.” Jack laughs when Waverly takes a bite of biscuit and nods approvingly, if not surprised.

 

Nicole can’t help a memory that comes to mind, growing up in Montana. Her mother would try and teach her how to cook because it would be what a husband would expect. ‘ _You won’t find a husband if you can’t feed one’_ , she’d said.

 

She prefers to remember a different time, when she’d been a year into choosing her _own_ life, living on her _own_ terms.

 

“When I was on this cattle run in New Mexico, you’d think the men I was with could barely open a can of beans, they were so rough and uncouth, but I’d never eaten so good!” Nicole shares as they methodically clean their plates. “They were all men from south of the border, didn’t speak a lick of English, but boy could they cook. Beans, cactus soup, wild game with seasoning! And tortillas! I thought I died and gone to heaven!” Nicole reminisces with a wistful chuckle.

 

“Have you been unimpressed with my offerings, Mr. Haught?” Waverly asks in a teasing tone, but there’s enough sincerity in the question to make Nicole begin stumbling over her words to reassure the woman as Waverly busies herself with picking up the pup and putting him in her lap.

 

“With what you’ve had to work with, I’ve been tremendously impressed, Waverly, I swear!” She gets out in a mildly desperate tone.

 

Jack starts to laugh and both of them turn to look at him. He just shakes his head in utter amusement. “I’m turning in.” He says and goes to scrape his plate and rinse it in the river, the pup jumping off Waverly’s lap to follow.

 

When Jack returns, he pulls Nicolas aside. “You continuing on with your previous sleeping arrangements?” He asks in a low whisper. Nicole looks at him in confusion.

 

“What do you mean?” She asks.

 

“Well, when Champ took off, he didn’t leave Waverly the tent so she slept in yours.” He says as if it should be obvious what he meant.

 

“I thought she slept at the inn. I was so out of it.” Nicole says slowly, like realization had dawned on her. _I thought I’d been dreaming when I’d pictured her there next to me, wrapped up in blankets._

“Nope. Inn owner offered, but she said she’d rather keep an eye on you.” He smirks as he claps Nicole on the shoulder and gives him a soft chuckle. “Me and Yukon here will be slumbering away, but we’ll leave room for ya if she kicks you out.”

 

Panic ripples through her as she wonders if Waverly had seen or sensed anything about her, but she imagined Waverly would have said something. Still, she had every intention of offering Waverly her tent; she’d sleep outside under the stars.

 

But Waverly would have none of it, listing very practical reasons for sharing the tent: Nicole was still recovering and two people sharing a tent offered more warmth and Waverly hated to sleep cold. After a delicate dance of dressing for bed taking turns in the tent, they’d finally settled in, Nicole drifting off immediately only to wake a few minutes later as she felt Waverly snuggle into her back.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	11. Dawson City

They break camp and have the boats loaded right as the sun comes up, anxious for their last day of travel. The rest of the way into Dawson should be calm and smooth so Jack makes the suggestion that Waverly and Nicolas take one boat and he and the guide will lead in the other. Jack almost laughs out loud when both readily agree.

 

Nicolas helps Waverly into the boat, letting her pick if she wants to take the oars or relax on the front thwart as there was no need to set the rudder in. She chooses to take the oars, which didn’t surprise Nicole one bit. Waverly was as pretty as one, but she was no princess. It’s one of the things that drew Nicole to her. She wasn’t afraid of hard work.

 

Nicole decides to take the rear thwart once Waverly makes her decision, just for the sole purpose of being able to watch her unabashedly.

 

She wants so badly to ask about Champ, but she feels she’s in no position to. Even if Waverly does decide that Champ wasn’t worth wasting her life away on, it wouldn’t be fair to ask Waverly, down the road, to consider her as a suitor. She’d eventually find out Nicole isn’t who she says she is and that would be the end of that.

 

She does find her mind wandering though as she stares at Waverly’s back, seeing subtle shifts in her shoulders as she maneuvers the oars in the lazy moving river. She daydreams of an alternative life, one where she’s really a man and she met Waverly before Champ. She imagines them on this adventure together, sharing all the joys and challenges, falling into bed at night, under the stars or cover of their tent, wrapped together, whispering their closest held thoughts to each other.

 

She sighs dejectedly, knowing it’s foolish to dream like that, for it can never come true.

 

“Hey, Nicolas, look.” Jack shouts over his shoulder pointing at something near the shore. Nicole sits up and looks to where he’s pointing. It looks like the piece of a boat. Jack tells the guide to head towards it as Nicolas does the same after taking over for Waverly as a deep sense of foreboding washes over her.

 

“Nicolas, what is it?” Nicole hears Waverly ask, and she can hear it too in her voice as she stands behind Nicole, hand on her shoulder to steady herself as she tries to get a better look.

There’s no place to really stop the boat among the rocks near this part of the bank. As they near it, Jack tosses out a make shift hook, grabbing the piece as they slowly float by it.

 

He pulls it out of the water and inspects it. “Part of a gunwhale with the oar latch attached.” Jack calls back. As they continue to float near the bank, he spots something large and white. He tosses his hook out again and pulls it to the boat. It’s rolled up tight and water-logged so it takes him a few minutes to cut open the ties. He rolls it open and sees it’s a tent with a waterproof blanket, bedroll and some bed clothes. He recognizes them and a cold stab of dread pierces his heart. As much as he disliked Champ, he didn’t wish death upon him. But it was obvious the boat didn’t make it through the rapids intact.

 

“Jack?” Waverly calls weakly. She already knows. She knows whatever it is he pulled aboard, it belonged to Champ. She watches him for some kind of confirmation, her eyes wide and shiny. Jack looks back at her sadly.

 

“Oh god.” She squeaks out as she begins to cry. Nicole secures the oars just as Waverly drops down next to her, holding her face as tears stream down. Nicole does the only thing she can, she wraps her arms around the woman and holds her as long as she can before the boat begins to veer off course.

 

She spots an area where she can get out of the current and one handedly steers the boat in that direction until she hits soft bottom. She grabs for some low lying branches to pull them in a bit and turns her attention to Waverly.

 

“We don’t know that he hasn’t made it out, or was rescued.” She offers, but knows it’s most likely untrue. The steep cliffs that surround the Yukon at Five Fingers are at least 20 feet high. There’s nowhere to climb ashore for at least a mile after the rapids. The size of the boat piece they encountered and the fact they hadn’t even seen debris until now tells just how violent the boat break up must have been. Chances are they’ll be running into more.

 

Nicole sits and holds Waverly for a few minutes which is as long as she can before they need to get moving again. She sees Jack in an animated conversation with the guide upstream a ways and knows he’s complaining about the stoppage.

 

Waverly seems to sense this and pulls away. “I’m sorry.” She whispers, her eyes red and swollen. Nicole pulls out her handkerchief and hands it to Waverly as she slides a little ways away and begins to compose herself.

 

“No need to be sorry Waverly. Let’s get to Dawson. They should have more information, okay?” Nicole says with a small smile.

 

Waverly nods and goes to sit at the front thwart as Nicole pushes away from the bank. She sees Waverly’s back straighten as her eyes scan the river for any more evidence of her husband.

 

 

 

They finally reach Dawson at sundown, having traveled a bit slower in order to spot anything left of Champ’s boat, but they see nothing further. Any other time they would have marveled at the downright sizeable city Dawson was, but with the turn of events, all Waverly wants to do is find the RCMP office and ask if there’s any news of her husband.

“I’ll go to the claims office, see if there’s any chance he made it a staked a claim.” Jack says, knowing Nicolas would go with Waverly. “We’ll meet back at the boats when we are finished.” Jack says with a sympathetic pat on Nicole’s shoulder.

 

They ask around until they are pointed to a moderate sized stone building and Nicole follows Waverly right up to the desk man.

 

“My husband’s boat crashed near Five Fingers a few days ago. I was wondering… have you any information?” She asks in a rush.

 

Nicole wants to punch the man at his look of utter disinterest as he slowly brings himself to sit upright and open some sort of log. “What’s his name?” He asks in a slow monotone.

 

“Champ. Champ Hardy.” She says immediately.

 

“Hardy… hmm…” He says and Waverly tries to lean over to see what he’s reading. He looks up and notices and then his face turns from apathy to something akin to sympathy.

 

“Can you describe him, ma’am?” He asks slowly and Nicole braces for what’s to come. Waverly looks from Nicole to the Mountie and Nicole can see her start to tremble.

 

“Light hair, brown eyes. Strong build. Same height as…” she gestures to Nicole.

 

“Any scars, other markings?” He asks as he stands and grabs his hat.

 

“Small scar near his left eye.” She says, her voice shaking now too.

 

“If you’ll follow me, ma’am.” He says and grabs a set of keys.

 

“I… can go.” Nicole offers and Waverly looks at her pleadingly for a moment before her expression stills and her eyes turn resolute.

 

“No, I’ll do it. But will you come with me?” Waverly asks and Nicole is nodding before she can finish the question.

 

They are taken to a cellar and are led down a few steps and then inside to a small room, kept cold by being halfway underground. The Mountie checks a couple of tags before finding the right one, pulling the sheet back and standing back. Waverly’s knees go weak at the sight and Nicole catches her before she sinks to the ground. She turns and buries her face into Nicole’s chest.

 

“Yes, that’s him.” Nicole says and the Mounty covers him quickly.

 

“Some Mounties on patrol near the river bank found him. There were some items that were recovered as well. I’ll just have you sign for them if you can back at the office…” He says awkwardly as he holds the lantern up signaling they can exit if they’d like. They step back out, Waverly clinging to Nicole until the Mountie leads them over to the back of the office. The items are most of Champ’s clothes and boots as those were the only other things that most likely kept to the surface. Nicole quickly signs for them and lets the Mountie know she’ll be back in the morning to fetch them.

 

“We’ll need to know what you want done with the body by tomorrow as well. I’m sorry for your loss.” He says sincerely and Nicole thanks him and leads Waverly away and back to the boats.

 

 

Jack is there waiting for them, perched on a wooden bench. When he sees the state Waverly is in, he pulls his hat off and stands. He exchanges a look with Nicole and his lips form a grim line as he picks up Yukon who is whining next to him on the bench.

 

“Waverly, I’m so sorry.” He says and Waverly picks her head up and gives him a quiet, strained ‘thanks’.

 

“I can’t believe he’s… gone.” She says, wiping her face with the handkerchief Nicole gave her earlier that day. Jack gives her an empathetic smile and squeezes her shoulder gently.

 

“I’m going to go get us some rooms at the inn.” He announces and gently hands over Yukon to Waverly who immediately brings him to her chest and cuddles him.

 

“I think that’s a good idea.” Nicole agrees, gesturing for Waverly to sit on the bench. “We’ll be here.” She says and gives Jack a grateful smile.

 

…

 

 

They get settled in the last two rooms available with Nicole and Waverly in the double room with two beds. Nicole sighs in relief, not wanting to have to sleep on the floor.

 

“I’ll go down and get us something to eat while you ready yourself for bed. Is that okay?” Nicole asks gently.

 

“Yes. Thank you Nicolas. I’m sorry that…” She says, eyes downcast.

 

“Hey, you have nothing to be sorry for, you hear me? Absolutely nothing.” Nicole says with quiet conviction.

 

“Well, I thank you.. for being here. Not sure what I would have done without you and Jack, truly.” She says with a small, sad smile.

 

Nicole nods and returns the smile then leaves Waverly to get ready for bed.

 

She runs into Jack downstairs and sits down with a beer while their food is being prepared.

 

“Listen, I didn’t want to bring it up, but when I was at the claims office, I put a claim in. There was only the last one left, Nicolas.” He says, letting the magnitude of his statement settle for only a few seconds. “I put your name on the deed too. We can work it 50/50. I couldn’t wait to go get you to discuss it. I hope this is okay.” He says as he grips and re-grips his mug of beer uneasily.

 

“Jack, I.. You didn’t have to do that. But I thank you. I hope you know I’d done the same.” Nicole says earnestly. She gives him a smile and holds out her hand. “Partners, then?”

 

“Partners.” He says with a relieved smile.

 

“You have any idea what Waverly is going to do?” Jack asks after toasting their deal.

 

“Haven’t gotten that far yet. After this inn stay and paying half the claim, I only have a bit of money left, but if she wants to go back home, I’ll help pay for it.” She says resolutely.

 

“Same.” Jack says with a nod. “Go up and be with her. I’ll bring your food up when it’s ready.” He says.

 

“Thanks, Jack. You are a good friend.” Nicole says sincerely.

 

“As are you, Nicolas.” Jack smiles.

 


	12. Telegram

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for continuing to comment! I thoroughly enjoy reading everyone's opinions!

Waverly wakes before the sun and quietly slips out of bed. As she dresses in the pre-dawn purple glow coming through the thin curtain, she replays her thoughts that had bombarded her all night, causing her to toss and turn until falling into a fitful sleep well past mid-night, then waking her up again now.

 

When Champ had refused to wait, to even hire a guide, Waverly had felt, deep down, that this just might be it for her and Champ. Gone was the wide-eyed, excited for adventure with his new wife, Champ. When news of a new gold strike in the north hit their area, Champ immediately began talking about heading there, finding their fortune together and seeing where life took them after that. It was all Waverly ever dreamed of.

 

But soon she began to realize who Champ really was. When the journey proved to be much more challenging than either of them thought, he wilted under the strain and where he used to talk about how they’d be partners in their adventures, she’d only ever been treated almost equitably when Champ wanted or needed something from her. She’d tried her best to be the perfect, supporting wife, ready to make life a bit easier when she could, but it wasn’t enough. He’d grown more despondent, lazy and selfish as the trip went on.

 

Despite his selfish, reckless decision to push on, without consideration for his or even her safety, she was ready to talk it out with him once they both reached Dawson. But she didn’t know it would be the last she’d ever see him and that made her incredibly sad. She’d known him all her life and could recall good times she had with him, times when she felt like the center of the universe for someone.

 

But then that sadness turns to anger when she thinks about what would have happened had she just gone along with him. She’d be dead too.

 

She steps around the dressing area and pauses to study Nicolas as he continues to sleep, snoring softly, his unruly hair covering half his face. She smiles. Even in the beginning, in Dyea, where Champ had thought of her second, Nicolas had made sure to consider her, even before himself. Where Champ was loathe to do work, Nicolas jumped in, often doing more than his share. He’d even gotten deathly ill from trying to save someone else’s life. A life that shouldn’t have even been lost had it not been for Champ’s stubbornness.

 

She turns away abruptly as guilt gnaws at her suddenly. Her husband isn’t even in the ground yet and here she is thinking so ill of him and comparing him to another man. She takes a deep breath and shakes her head. She grabs her boots and slips out of the door, down to the inn’s saloon where she can be alone with her thoughts. There’s much that needs to be thought through and done now that she’s alone here in the Klondike.

 

…

 

Nicole opens her eyes slowly, feeling like she’d been drugged. _I guess even half a beer was enough to knock me out good._ She muses as she scrubs her face. She quickly checks to see that her wrap is still snuggly in place. She hates wearing it to bed, but with Waverly a couple of feet away, she couldn’t risk it.

 

She turns slowly to look over at Waverly and realizes she’s not in the room. She gets up and gets dressed quickly and goes in search of her.

 

She finds her sitting alone in the saloon as its still an hour or so before it opens.

 

“Morning.” Nicole greets as she pulls up a seat across from Waverly. Waverly quickly wipes at her eyes and gives Nicolas a watery smile.

 

“Morning.” She returns and then falls silent again. She’d been contemplating what to do now that her husband and all their belongings are gone. She plans to send a telegraph to her family letting them know what happened. She supposes she needs to ask for funds so she can pay for passage back home. The thought makes her ill though; having made it up here just to turn around and go back to the one place she’s been anxious to leave her entire life.

 

“Did you get any sleep last night?” Nicole eventually asks after awhile and Waverly looks up at her, having to actually think about the question.

 

“I got some. My mind didn’t want to turn off.” She says with a heavy sigh and her eyes cast back down as she continues to absently pick at a splinter that had come up on the otherwise smooth saloon table. “I need to send a telegram back home…” She says, trying to hold back another onslaught of tears.

 

“Will you… are you going to go back?” Nicole asks, the question coming out without thought.

 

“I really don’t have much of a choice. Everything we came up here with is gone. I haven’t the first clue what to do, or where to even start…” Waverly says and begins to get upset. She doesn’t want to think about this right now.

 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked that. You are barely beginning to mourn your husband.” Nicole says, shame-faced. They look at each other for a moment and Waverly gives her a sad, conciliatory smile.

 

“No, it’s a valid question. I’ve got to figure something out soon.” She says with a sigh.

 

Nicole hesitates for a moment but then reaches over and squeezes Waverly’s hand and quickly retracts it when she thinks she might have overstepped. She gives her a small smile though. “In the meantime, if you’d like, you can stay with Jack and me. Believe it or not, we got the last claim last night. We are partnering up. We are setting up camp today and then starting on building our cabins.”

 

Waverly shake her head slowly at the irony. Champ was right, but he wasn’t here to gloat, which he most certainly would have. If he’d made it through, they would have already been camped out on their own claim…

 

Nicole takes Waverly’s silence and expression as a sign of rejection and quickly adds, “We could ask around here too, to see if any of the places are looking for help. I know you aren’t afraid of hard work.” She tries, offering a hopeful smile at her other idea.

 

“Oh, uh… I’ll… I guess I will stay with you both until I’ve made up my mind? Is that okay? I’ll cook and clean and launder for you both…” Waverly says in a rush, not wanting to really be away from them and thrust into a new, unknown situation right now.

 

“It’s more than okay. Don’t worry about any of that. I’m sorry we’ll be in tents for the first few days though…” Nicole says, immeasurably happy that Waverly has decided to camp with them. She’s not ready to have the brunette out of her life.

 

“Well, I’m going to go back to the room and compose a telegram.” Waverly says as she scoots her chair back and stands. She leans over the table though towards Nicole and she looks up at her curiously to see Waverly inspecting her stitched head wound.

 

“Those stitches need to come out. Why don’t you come up first and we’ll take them out.” Waverly says and Nicole gives her a small smile and follows her up.

 

…

 

Nicole goes to find Jack while Waverly works on her telegram. They grab breakfast together and then head to the boats. It’ll be a long day of off loading and transporting all of their supplies to their claim.

 

The ground is still mostly frozen over, but the spring thaw is showing signs of settling in. They are glad they had the foresight to pack their sleds instead of selling them off.

 

“Waverly did a nice job on that stitching.” Jack comments as Nicole takes her hat off and wipes her brow. She smiles proudly and runs her fingers over the now mostly closed wound.

 

“She did. She also told me it adds character to my face.” She laughs and Jack joins in.

 

“It only makes you slightly more ugly than you were before.” He teases and Nicole punches him in the arm.

 

“Where’s that wild beast of yours? Can’t believe they let you in the inn with that thing.” Nicole says as they load their sleds.

 

“Oh, they didn’t know. Stuffed him in my coat when I checked us in. He slept right on the bed with me, tucked right under my butt!” Jack chuckles as he unzips his lightweight coat and produces the small pup. He pops open one of his smaller crates, takes out the contents and makes a little bed in there for him and secures it the front of the sled.

 

“You really gonna keep him?” Nicole asks.

 

“I named him. Gotta keep him.” He grins.

Waverly slowly walks through the town, staring in wonder at all the storefronts and buildings. It’s almost as big as walking through downtown San Francisco. She sees some of the places even have electric lights!

 

She notices plenty of dance halls, saloons, mercantile stores, even a store that sold only women’s dresses! There were gambling halls, soda fountains, restaurants. Anything the heart desires she thinks could be found on this half mile stretch of Main Street.

 

She finally reaches the Post Office and walks in, quickly locating the telegraph department. She pulls out her letter and reads over it again. Every word costs, so she had to be succinct.

 

**_Earp Homestead                                          May 8, 1897_ **

**_Purgatory, USA_ **

****

**_Dear Ma and Pa,_ **

****

**_Champ is dead. Drowned in rapids. I am fine. Made it to Dawson. Awaiting instructions from his family on his body. Love, Waverly_ **

 

She shivers at the abruptness, but it’s all she can afford to send. She decides to leave out coming back for now. Perhaps she can pick up some small jobs and send a more detailed telegram when she knows exactly what she wants to say and do.

 

She hands the telegram to the operator and the money for it that she found in a pair of Champ’s pants that were recovered from the river.

 

She leaves the address at the inn for her contact information and goes to the Mountie office to let them know she’s waiting word on what to do with Champ’s body from his parents.

 

She then makes her way back to the docks to see if the men need help in transporting supplies. She needs something to do to keep her mind off of her current situation.

 

 

 

 


	13. Jealousy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nicole is jealous. A secret is discovered.

“Yukon! Come here!” Waverly calls as the pup runs around Jack’s legs, yipping excitedly. Jack would have scooped him up, but he was on the other end of a two hundred pound log they’d just cut to fit into the first log cabin.

 

They had the floor done and were starting on the walls, working from sun up to sun down trying to get it finished before mid-spring when it would be time to start mining their claim. They’d decided on just building one cabin for the both of them since they’d only be here a year and didn’t want to waste their resources or time.

 

Jack and Nicole pause while Waverly wrangles the wolf pup. Once she has him secured against her chest, she steps clear and watches them wrestle the log up onto the porch and then hoist it into place.

 

“Supper will be ready in about half an hour she calls to them and Nicole tips her hat in acknowledgment and smiles. Waverly smiles back and gives the pup a kiss on the nose as she turns back to the pot of rabbit stew she has cooking.

 

“She said anything about her plans yet?” Jack asks as he helps slide the log into the groove.

 

“Not yet.” Nicole answers evenly. The brunette had been pretty quiet about future plans once she got a telegram instructing her to just have Champ laid to rest there. It costs an awful lot of money to ship a body from the Klondike. His parents had wired some money to bury him and that’s all Nicole knows.

 

They’d had a brief service for him and some of the townsfolk and stampeders that had been in the larger group on their trek up had taken a small collection up for Waverly. It was enough to get her a few more seasonal clothes and other things she’d needed immediately. The rest she’d given to Jack for feeding and lodging her, knowing Nicolas wouldn’t take it from her. Unbeknownst to Waverly though, Jack had tucked it away just in case Waverly needed it back.

 

“Well, I need to know if we need to add an addition to this cabin if I need to sleep out back.” Jack laughs.

 

Nicole rolls her eyes at him and slips off the log she’d been perched on. “Let’s keep moving. I want to get one more up before supper.” She says.

 

 

As they sit around the fire eating, Waverly clears her throat. Both look up at her expectantly.

 

“My parents want me back home. They are ready to wire the money for my return trip.” She says as she sets her bowl down and brings her eyes up. She looks at Nicole who is trying to school her features.

 

Nicole figures this was the way it would go, Waverly would be asked by her family to return and she’d abide by their request.

 

“As a single, unmarried woman with no claim, I’m not sure what I could do up here to earn a living. I sure don’t want to work as an ‘entertaining girl’ and I’ve got no real viable skills.” She starts and then stops and takes a breath, looking directly at Nicole. “But I don’t want to go back home. I worked so hard to get up here. I want to stay.” She says finally, resolutely. Nicole can barely contain a proud, relieved smile as the two continue to stare at each other.

 

Jack is first to speak up, breaking the two out of their mutual regard. “Well, you always have a place to stay here. And for propriety sake, we could build you a little cabin. You could work for us, like you’ve been doing, but we’d pay you a wage with our gold proceeds.”

 

“I can’t put you both out to build me a cabin…” She says, but as she looks at Nicole, she knows it would be something she’d certainly entertain. _She wants to stay._ Nicole would build her a two-story brick house with her own hands if she wanted one.

 

“Hey, we’re getting pretty damn good at it. We’d be happy to build you a little cabin… right over there.” Nicole adds, pointing to a flat spot near the creek just about 20 steps from the main cabin.

 

Waverly turns to look at the spot and grins widely. “It’s a good spot.” She says, eyes still alight as they lock onto Nicole’s.

 

“It is a good spot.” Nicole repeats with her own shy, dimpled grin.

 

 

…

 

 

 

“Jack! Jack!” Nicole bellows excitedly as she reaches down into her sluice box as she hears Jack splashing through the creek from upstream.

 

He comes to a breathless halt next to her and peers down at her hand, eyes going wide at the nugget about the size of a pea. They’d been toiling for nearly a month digging, picking and scratching through the slowly thawing permafrost and now with their sluice and rocker boxes built, they were full steam ahead.

 

Waverly hears the commotion and comes out from around her cabin where she’d been hanging clothes on the clothesline. Nicole spots her and excitedly calls her over.

 

“Is that gold?” She asks as Jack picks it up out of Nicole’s hand and puts it in Waverly’s.

 

“It is.” Nicole smiles widely and Waverly beams.

 

“I’ll go get a little sack!” Waverly giggles gleefully as she drops it back into Jack’s hand.

 

Nicole watches her skip up to the cabins for a second before getting back to work on the rocker and Jack heads back to the shaft to load more buckets of soil on a bench next to the rocker.

 

As the sun went down, they ended up with a few more similar sized nuggets and about two handfuls of gold dust.

 

“We should celebrate.” Jack says as he and Nicole clean up for the day.

 

“What did you have in mind?” Nicole asks, standing and giving her full attention.

 

“Well, drinks and dinner in town would take pretty much all we found today, so…” He chuckles, then his face turns thoughtful as he really concentrates.

 

“How about a matinee tomorrow at Gertie’s Dance Hall?” Nicole suggests. “We’ll cut out a bit early, have supper and go?” She asks.

 

“Sounds like a splendid idea!” Jack says with a grin. “Let’s go tell Waverly.”

 

 

They finish cleaning up and then head to the river to wash their hands and face, excitedly planning their trip tomorrow afternoon.

 

When they’ve sat down to dinner, Nicole brings it up.

 

“So, Jack and I were wondering if you wanted to go catch the matinee tomorrow. Kind of a celebration for finding our first gold.” She says as she pulls apart her fish with her fork.

 

Waverly smiles at first, then frowns. “I.. I really don’t have anything suitable to wear.” She says quietly.

 

“It’s a matinee. Casual is more than acceptable.” Jack reasons. “I think you’ll be fine.” He adds with a warm smile.

 

She looks down at her plate and Nicole can tell she’s not convinced, but she brings her eyes up to Jack’s and smiles anyway. “Alright then. That sounds lovely.” She agrees.

 

 

 

Later that night, Nicole tosses and turns. The three had settled into a very workable, pleasant routine and Nicole hasn’t been this happy in a very long time. But every time she finds herself wanting to ask to take a walk with Waverly or just spend some one on one time with her (usually with Jack’s prodding), she reminds herself why that’s impossible.

 

It’s been a little over a month since they laid Champ to rest and increasingly she can see that Waverly has gone from mourning her husband to embracing the day to day in their mining camp with lightness and contentedness.

 

Nicole has also noticed the longer looks Waverly gives her, the shy smiles, the little extra things she’ll do for her that she doesn’t for Jack.

 

She’d like nothing more than to outwardly return the subtle gestures, but with the dark cloud of deceit hanging so heavy over her, the best she can do is make sure Waverly is appreciated and well cared for. But it hurts her heart. She aches to be able to lay it all bare and have the brunette accept her, but it’s too big a risk.

 

…

 

 

All day, Nicole thinks about their matinee outing. Her thoughts last night come back and she becomes quite melancholy even as she indulges in the fantasy of asking Waverly to be her official date to the matinee, escorting her to dinner afterwards, just the two of them.

 

So lost in thought she overloads the rocker and it tips over at the weight.

 

“Goddamnit!” She shouts, causing Jack to pop his head out of the shaft he’d been collecting soil from.

 

“You okay?” He calls downriver.

 

“Yes, just upended the rocker. I’ve got it.” She responds tersely. When she leans down to right it and begins to scoop up what’s left of the soil, she sees something shiny under a rock the size of teakettle. She shoves it aside and begins to dig.

 

“Holy shit.” She murmurs.

 

“Hey, I’m gonna go to town and get tickets.” She hears Jack say and steps over the spot she was beginning to dig.

 

“Okay.” She says and waits until he’s in the cabin to bend back down and start digging.

 

She’s not sure why she just hid her finding from him, but doesn’t analyze too much. She smiles cheekily picturing the looks on their faces when she presents it to them. If it’s as big as she thinks it is, they might just faint.

 

…

 

Nicole is grinning so hard, her cheeks hurt as she pulls the ladder out of the shaft and covers it. She grabs a bucket and carries it back to the cabin, intent on having a quick bath before the matinee. She reaches her and Jack’s shared cabin, surprised he’s not back yet. She takes the opportunity to hide the palm-sized piece of gold in her clothing chest and then sets the bucket near the fire to warm and walks over to Waverly’s. Her throat constricts when she hears Jack and Waverly in a spirited, jovial conversation.

 

She knocks and is immediately let in by a smiling, tearful Waverly. “Come in.” She says, leaving the door open and walking back to where Jack sat, a proud smile on his face.

 

“Nicolas! Look what Jack bought me.” She says with such effervescence Nicole can’t help but smile as well. She watches as Waverly holds up the pastel rose colored chiffon dress with delicate lace accents. She does a half-turn with it pressed to her body and gives Jack another wide smile. “I’m paying you back though, I mean it.”

 

Jack just waves a hand at her dismissing the thought. “It’s lovely, Waverly.” Nicole says with a smile that doesn’t come close to reaching her eyes. She gives a pointed look at Jack as her heart begins to hammer in her chest. “I have water on the fire, if you’ll excuse me.” She says curtly and turns to walk out, leaving the duo a bit perplexed.

 

 

Nicole goes straight to their cabin, increasingly becoming irate, nearly searing her hand as she grabbed the bucket and tossed it violently into the tub. She is so incensed at what Jack did and it initially confused her until she finally recognized it as jealousy. An all-consuming jealousy that _he_ was the one to give her the dress, _he_ was the one to get that look of joyful surprise, _he_ was the one that could realistically have a future with her because he was a _real man._

Nicole has the bath half filled and is ready to step in when she hears Jack enter the cabin, the heavy canvas bathing room separator swinging gently by the draft.

 

She hears him pace around for a moment and then his voice, close to the barrier. “What was that Nicolas?” He finally asks, warily.

 

“How did you know her size, Jack?” She asks with a clipped tone.

 

“I guessed mostly but my sister is around the same size.” He answers. “Why did you get mad?” He asks.

 

Nicole scoffs. “You know how I feel about her. And now you go and buy her a beautiful dress and she looks at you like you hung the goddamn moon!” Nicole shouts. She knows she sounds petty, jealous, but she doesn’t care. She _is_ jealous. And she feels betrayed by her friend.

 

“Look, Nicolas…” Jack starts but wanting to talk man to man and explain himself, he pulls open the canvas. Everything feels like its in slow motion as his eyes widen in shock and his mouth falls agape as Nicole scrambles to cover her chest in utter horror.


	14. Happy Accidents

Nicole hears the cabin door slam and sits in the tub, shaking and nauseous. There’s no mistake Jack saw what she was and now she’s sure he ran over to tell Waverly. She slips out of the bath, gets dressed and sits on her bed, waiting for them to come at her in judgment.

 

There’s a knock on the door and she takes a deep breath, trying to steady her nerves.

 

“Nicolas? Are you guys almost ready?” Waverly asks from the porch, eyeing the clothes Nicole usually wears for mining.

 

“Uh, he’s not with you?” Nicole asks in a quick stab of relief as she steps out a bit, looking for Jack. She’s so preoccupied with Jack she doesn’t realize Waverly is in her new dress.

 

Waverly shakes her head slowly, wondering what is going on between the two friends. She thought she’d made Nicolas mad somehow and was hoping to talk to him, but it seems the men are at odds with each other.

 

On a further self-conscious level, she’s disappointed that Nicolas doesn’t even seem to notice her in the dress. Even though Jack bought it for her, well, he bought all three of them new clothes for the matinee - from the proceeds of selling his sled last week, he’d said - she was only interested in one man’s opinion, and he had yet to even notice.

 

“I gotta go find him.” Nicole says and pushes off the porch past Waverly and down to where he usually goes when he and Yukon need to stretch their legs.

 

 

She arrives at the clearing and doesn’t see them. She is racking her brain on where else to look when Yukon bounds over, plops down and starts gnawing on her boots.

 

“I think I subconsciously knew something was off with you.” She hears from behind her. She turns, half expecting him to have a weapon, ready to put her down. Instead, he’s carrying a brown paper wrapped package, a contemplative frown on his face.

 

“Baby smooth face, lack of an adam’s apple…” He continues as he walks steadily towards her. “I’ve never met a man like you. You’re too good in every way. Brave, chivalrous, never complain, first to volunteer…” He stops speaking as he comes to stand a foot away and holds the package out for Nicole to take. She stands frozen however, not sure what to do.

 

Finally, Jack’s face slides into a sly grin. “You’re too good of a man _because_ you are a woman.”

 

Nicole still can’t find words and she’s still too afraid to move. She’s having a hard time understanding what Jack’s reaction is.

 

Jack sees this in his friend’s expression and knows he needs to put him.. her.. at ease.

 

“I bought us all outfits for the matinee.” He says first, looking down at the package in his hand. He sighs and grabs Nicole’s hand, placing it in hers.

 

“As far as what I saw in the tub, your secret will be my secret until my dying breath. Just know that I’ll be here if you need me. Somewhere down the road, you’ll need to come clean with Waverly.” Nicole wants to cry at his words, but when he gets to his last sentence her eyes go wide in fright and he puts up a placating hand.

 

“I can’t speak for her, but I think if you are honest with her and then give her time, she’ll come around. Any fool can see you two belong together, no matter your parts.” He says confidently.

 

Nicole doesn’t know what to say or really how to feel. A part of her feels immense relief that she can share this secret with someone. The other is terrified she’s forced to put her trust in someone other than herself.

 

“But I do have one question?” Jack asks seriously.

 

“Just one?” Nicole laughs and Jack joins in with a wry smile. “Ask it.” She says sincerely.

 

“What’s your given name?”

 

“I wasn’t very creative. Nicole.” She says with a shrug.

 

“Well, I’ll never use it out loud, but good to know.” He smiles.

 

She breathes a sigh of relief. If she was going to get discovered by someone, she was awfully glad it was someone who took it in amazingly smooth stride.

 

She looks down, trying to compose herself when her attention is drawn to the package and she suddenly remembers her little fit about him buying Waverly a dress. She had judged her friend badly and she felt immediate guilt.

 

“About Waverly and the dress…” Nicole starts but Jack stops her by clapping his hand down on her shoulder.

 

“I just found out about your true identity and the first thing you are worried about is me trying to steal your girl…” He huffs good-naturedly.

 

“No, I was trying to apologize.” Nicole says, smiling stubbornly now as Jack laughs.

 

“Apology accepted. I could buy that girl a pony, a carriage _and_ a mansion and she’d push me out of the way so she can live in it with you.” He mutters feigning chagrin.

 

“Speaking of ponies, carriages and mansions. I have one more surprise for you.” Nicole smirks as she makes her way out of the clearing with a puzzled Jack and bounding Yukon in tow, her step lighter than it’s been in years.

 

 

When they get back to the cabin, Waverly is sitting inside at the dining table. She stands and nervously smoothes out her dress as she looks at them both with a deeply worried expression. She opens her mouth to speak, but closes it and just looks at them expectantly.

 

“Sorry, Waverly, there was a misunderstanding, but it’s settled.” Nicole says, taking in the woman’s appearance fully for the first time. Waverly smiles shyly at the sweet appraisal.

 

Jack wipes the huge knowing grin off of his face and then clears his throat. “Someone thought I was trying to steal his girl. Come on Waverly, let’s let Nicolas get dressed, huh?” He says quickly and ushers her out before either Nicole or Waverly could address his frank words.

 

Jack turns to wink at her before quickly slipping the door closed. “See you in two shakes, Nicolas!”

 

Nicole groans in embarrassment, standing there for a moment and then goes to her bed placing the package down and opening it up. She’s shocked to find a nice pair of dark tweed pants with a lapelled waistcoat to match. She quickly pulls out her the white shirt, suspenders, shoes and felt derby hat she’d worn on the steamship up. She decides she’ll show them the gold piece after they come home from the matinee.

 

…

 

 

The three walk to Main St. in relative silence until Nicole finds her courage and leans over to Waverly to whisper, “You do look beautiful, Waverly.”

 

Waverly blushes mightily and looks up at Nicole. “And you. Very handsome.” She looks ahead to where Jack has stepped up his pace and says a bit louder, “I’d have to say that Jack has very good taste.” She giggles as Jack turns and dips his hat in an exaggerated bow.

 

Feeling a bit confident, Nicole pulls her elbow out and looks pointedly at Waverly who wastes no time in slipping her own arm around hers.

 

 

They are a bit late as they reach the dance hall and are escorted to their seats promptly. Jack takes the aisle while Waverly and Nicole file in before him. Nicole makes sure Waverly is seated before sitting down herself just as the first act starts.

 

The trio are thoroughly entertained as the variety show moves seamlessly through a lovely quartet playing both lively tunes and a few sad ballads, that bring about a few sniffles in the crowd, then there’s a hilarious Vaudeville act followed by an opera singer and the dance hall dancers bring down the house in a well-rehearsed, raucous routine.

 

The three of them leave the dance hall, laughing and chatting as if they’d imbibed during the show. They were all in high spirits and weren’t quite ready for it to come to an end, but they’d spent so much already.

 

“I’m going to head over to the grocer and pick up some fresh items for our dinner tonight.” Nicole announces and the other two nod approvingly.

 

They take a seat on the bench to enjoy the cool evening, still feeling the flush of being in the crowded dance hall.

 

“So are things truly alright between you and Nicolas?” Waverly asks in concern.

 

Jack thinks back to the secret he learned as he looks up the boardwalk for a moment.

 

“They are…” He says with confidence. He looks at Waverly fully and gives her warm smile. “I know you just lost Champ… and I’m not pushing anything on you, of course, but I don’t think you’re going to find a finer person than Nicolas.” He says, taking care to use a neutral pronoun in his statement. It’s not that he doesn’t want to keep Nicole’s confidence, he just wants to put that little nugget in Waverly’s head.

 

“I am still far from that right now, Jack, but your opinion has been my opinion since I met him.” She confesses quietly.

 

…

 

They make it back to the cabins as the sun just begins to dip behind the mountains and Waverly goes back to hers and changes, coming back quickly to get dinner started. She shoos them both away, saying she owes them a nice dinner after treating her to the dress and show.

 

“Wait. I have a surprise for you guys.” Nicole announces and Jack snaps his fingers in recollection.

 

“Okay, sit down and close your eyes.” She commands playfully and they both plop down and close their eyes with impatience.

 

There’s a solid thump in the middle of the table and both of them open their eyes.

“Nicolas!” Waverly shouts in utter shock. Jack picks it up immediately, hefting its weight.

 

“That’s gotta be 10 to 12 ounces.” He says his voice low in awe.

 

“13. Checked it on our scale.” Nicole says proudly. “It was buried under a large rock I’d dislodged when I knocked the rocker over.”

 

“Happy accidents, huh?” Waverly comments as she holds her hand out to feel the gold piece.

 

“Happy accidents indeed!” Jack echoes.

 

                 


	15. Suspicions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See what happens when the kids go back to school and I'm between projects? 
> 
> Oh and for those waiting for the other shoe to drop...
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> gulp

Nicole and Jack are about an hour into work when they finally see Waverly coming out of her cabin. She’s a bit disheveled and Nicole instantly steps away from the rocker box and wipes her hands off as she wades through the creek.

 

“You feeling sick again?” Nicole asks worriedly.

 

“Yes, I’m sorry. I really don’t know what’s wrong.” She says, rubbing her stomach.

 

“Don’t worry about it. Why don’t you go lay back down.” She says, running a hand up and down Waverly’s arm. Waverly gives her a wane smile. Even in her miserable state, a touch from the redhead warms her.

 

“Jack and I can rustle up something to eat. You want me to bring you some?” Nicole asks.

 

“Oh no. Food does not sound good at all right now.” She shakes her head as much as she’s physically able in her state.

 

“Okay. I’ll come check on you in a bit.” Nicole says and ushers her back into her cabin.

 

 

“She okay?” Jack asks as he wades over the creek to join Nicole. They both know it isn’t normal for Waverly to sleep in. She really must not be feeling well.

 

“Hope so.” She says looking back at Waverly’s door in concern. “We’re on our own for breakfast.” Nicole says and Jack nods.

 

 

A few hours later, Nicole notices Waverly is up and looking better. She’d brought her some tea hoping it would settle her stomach and she’s glad to see it must have done the trick.

 

“Joining us in the muck?” Jack comments when he sees Waverly has forgone her usual casual skirt for Nicole’s old oilskin trousers.

 

“More comfy in these.” She smiles as she wades over carefully, Nicole reaching out to help her the rest of the way. They hold hands for a few seconds longer than necessary before Waverly continues up the bank to a small sitting bench they’d built for breaks.

 

“Don’t go expecting me to pull a big gold boulder out of the creek now, you hear?” Nicole chuckles as she looks up at Waverly who has a bright smile on her face.

 

“That’s why I came out here!” She complains with a laugh.

 

“Alright, you! We’ve been out here for two months. Time you learned how to mine.” Nicole calls to her gruffly making Waverly laugh some more. She makes her way down the bank and Nicole gets her in position, showing her how to move the handle to initiate the rocker. She’s behind her, long arms framing the small brunette and she feels Waverly’s breath quicken at her close proximity as her own heart starts to beat just a little faster.

 

“Once the soil starts to be released, the water will wash all of the lighter material down through there.” Nicole says, pointing to the end of the sluice box. She then slowly grabs Waverly’s hand that isn’t on the handle and submerges it into the water so she can feel the ridges that catch heavier material, like gold flakes. The feeling of their hands together in the cold water feels like a weak electrical current through Nicole’s chest and she leans a bit closer by Waverly’s ear. “Close the handle like this.” She instructs as she puts her other hand atop Waverly’s together pulling the rocker handle until the water stops running through it. “Now look.” She says with a smile as their other hands slowly move over the ridges until Waverly sees some flakes of gold. She picks it up and holds it up to inspect it. Nicole puts her hand under Waverly’s so she can inspect it too.

 

Nicole’s cheek is so close to Waverly’s, she can smell the sweat and dirt clinging to her. She turns her head slightly, staring at Nicole’s profile.

 

Nicole’s attention is no longer on the gold flake either as she feels the brunette looking at her. She spooks under the scrutiny though and pulls her hand away, stepping back, automatically feeling the loss of contact viscerally. A flash of disappointment and confusion flash over Waverly’s face.

 

“And that’s how you mine for gold.” Nicole says quickly with a lopsided grin. Waverly turns, gold flake still in hand and gives Nicole an appreciative nod.

 

“Thanks for the lesson, Nicolas.” She says quietly.

 

“Any time.” Nicole gets out thickly. It’s getting harder and harder to temper her feelings for the brunette. She knows something’s got to give soon. She’s just not sure how or what though.

 

“Hey, Waverly, want to help me dig this shaft?” Jack calls out, covered head to toe in mud. The only things visible are his teeth and eyes.

 

“No thanks!” Waverly answers with a giggle.

 

“I’ll get dinner going for you guys and call you when it’s done, okay?” Waverly confirms and Nicole nods.

 

…

 

Nicole wakes up with her lower stomach in knots. “Ugh.” She groans and sits upright. She looks down when she feels something wet. “Oh great.” She says with a frustrated groan.

 

She hadn’t gotten her monthly in nearly four months on account of the strenuous activity and relatively poor diet while on their trek to Dawson. Seems like it’s come back in full force.

 

She’s glad Jack insisted on putting up a curtain between their beds when he found out her true identity. It allowed her more freedom inside her own space and prevented any further embarrassments for both. She slips out of her long johns and goes to her chest to pull out some rags.

 

 _These will have to do until I can get to the apothecary_. She thinks as she grabs a pair of her tightest breeches and stuffs the rags into them.

 

She’s just finishing washing the blood out of her long johns when she hears Waverly’s door open. She hurriedly scrubs more lye into the stain and plunges it into the creek, trying to rid them of the still bright pink stain.

She does the best she can and then wrings the garment out. She stands and turns to see Waverly coming towards her.

 

“I not do a good enough job with your laundry?” Waverly asks, half teasing, half serious.

 

“What? Oh, no, I just uh…” She stammers as she balls the long johns up in her hands. Waverly pulls it out of her hand and begins to unfold it, heading to the clothesline as Nicole follows her, wracking her brain for an explanation to the very faint, but still there stain.

 

“There, they’ll be dry by the time you need them again.” She says straightening them on the line and apparently not noticing anything out of the ordinary.

 

“Just because I’ve been tired lately doesn’t mean I can’t earn my keep, Nicolas.” Waverly says with quiet earnestness.

 

“I didn’t… I just…”

 

Waverly stops her stammering by popping up on her tip-toes and planting her lips on Nicole’s cheek. Nicole’s eyes go wide as Waverly brings her fingers to her lips and looks at Nicole with a cute, puzzled smile.

 

“Are you part First Nations, Nicolas? Your face is so smooth.” She muses as she reaches up and cups Nicole’s jaw lightly.

 

Nicole freezes in fear, knowing she’s about to be discovered. She’s in a storm of sensations and feels faint trying to sort through them all as warm, soft fingers run over her face. She watches Waverly’s brows furrow for a second and Nicole knows this is it.

But then they relax and Waverly’s eyes turn somewhat mirthful as whatever answer she was looking for seems to come to mind quickly. Her hand slips from Nicole’s jaw to her upper chest, patting lightly, right above her wrap. She smiles, a somewhat dreamy expression on her face.

 

“You are way more pleasant to kiss on the cheek than Champ was.” She offers and then her face stills and her eyes grow wide and a little shiny as her brain catches up to what she just said. “I.. I… I’ll go get wood for the fire.” She says suddenly and turns on her heel, heading to the woodpile behind her cabin.

 

Nicole nearly staggers back at the close call. She makes haste to her cabin, grabs her gold dust bag and tells Jack she’ll be back soon.

 

…

 

 

Nicole finds the wood pulp bandages and takes a handful. She peruses the shelves nearby, smiling ruefully when she catches herself automatically looking for something for Waverly. She’s been very low energy and nauseous and Nicole wonders what can help.

 

She decides to ask the apothecary for her opinion and brings her items up to the counter.

 

“Anything else I can do for you, Sir?” She asks with a warm smile. Nicole’s about to speak when the older women’s eyes squint and she shakes a small finger at her.

 

“I’ve seen you around before. You were with that lovely woman… Waverly is her name. She’s so sweet! She came in the other day to purchase my famous handmade body scrub.” She says, rather proud of herself for remembering.

 

Nicole is a bit taken aback. She’s accompanied Waverly into town on occasion, but doesn’t recall seeing the woman standing in front of her

 

“I take my breaks out front. Excellent people watchin’. Your kinda hard to miss, what with the height and that red hair.” She chuckles.

 

“The name is Gus.” She grins as she holds out a hand.

 

“Gus?” Nicole repeats with wide eyes as she takes the woman’s hand. She’s got a surprisingly strong handshake to go with her surprising name.

 

“That’s what everyone calls me.” She shrugs.

 

“Well, I’m Nicolas.” She says with a dimpled grin.

 

“Nicolas. I like it.” She smiles as she gathers Nicole’s purchases. “You have a lot of accidents at your claim?” Gus chuckles with a raised eyebrow gesturing to the bandages. “Or did the Missus send you to get these for her monthly.” She leans over conspiratorially and Nicole turns several shades of red.

 

Gus begins to cackle now as she brushes Nicole’s hand playfully. “I’m sorry, I do that to all the husbands that have their wives with them. Guess I shouldn’t give you all a hard time though, seeing as you are brave enough to do such a thing. There are only a couple of ya.”

 

Nicole recovers from near mortification and looks at the slight woman with wild curly dark hair. She’s unlike any woman she’d come across.

 

She looks at Nicole seriously for a second afraid she’d truly taken offense. Her eyes soften as she puts the items in a paper sack.

 

“I’m not one for decorum, I’m afraid. I grew up here when there weren’t nothin’ but a few log cabins and a fur-trading outpost. Went away to get my license and _‘bam!’_ An honest to goodness mining town springs up! There’s not much taboo around here where gold dust will by you anything. _Anything_.” She whispers cryptically.

 

The whole exchange is so absurd, Nicole can’t help but laugh… and take an automatic liking to the strange lady.

 

“Now that I’ve embarrassed myself with my loose tongue, anything else I can do for ya?” Gus asks, eyes bright.

 

Nicole decides not to correct the woman about her and Waverly’s relationship. She has a feeling that will launch the woman into 101 questions.

 

“Well, is there anything that’s good for above normal tiredness? Oh, and nausea?” Nicole asks.

 

“For you?” Gus asks, already turning around to look at her herbs and medicines.

 

“Uh, no, for Waverly.” She says.

 

“How long?” Gus says, turning.

 

“Going on a month and half.” She answers.

 

“She on her monthly?” Gus asks, pointing to the bandages woman commonly use for it.

 

“Oh, uh, I don’t know. I did just pick those up for me.. uh for accidents.” Nicole answers, feeling a bit out of her depth at the questions.

 

“Do you know last time she had her monthly?” She asks, obviously trying to get at something.

 

“I do not.” Nicole answers somewhat helplessly.

 

“How about weight gain?” Gus persists. Nicole thinks. She thinks Waverly has, but after finally being settled and eating better, they’d all put on some weight.

 

“Uh, a bit?” She answers.

 

Gus taps her finger to her lip and then looks at Nicole. A small smile graces her lips that confuses her mightily.

 

“Tell her to come in and see me as soon as she can.” She nods, that smile growing a bit bigger when Nicole becomes alarmed.

 

“Does it sound like something serious?” Nicole asks, brows furrowed.

 

“I had my suspicions last time she came in.” The older woman says, seemingly pleased with herself.

 

“Suspicions about what?” Nicole asks worriedly.

 

“Just have her come in as soon as she can.” She repeats and gives Nicole her bag, waving her away when she brings out her gold dust bag. “On the house.” She smiles.


	16. Congratulations

Nicole waits outside the back door of the apothecary, which also serves as Gus’ small medical practice. Turns out that Gus has more than one license.

 

Nicole hasn’t been pacing worriedly for long when Gus sticks her head outside, ushering her in. Waverly is just pulling her skirt down when Nicole crosses the threshold. She looks at her, eyes widening as Waverly gives her a small, tentative smile.

 

“Congratulations, Nicolas! You’re going to be a father!”

 

…

 

“Hey.” Nicole hears above her. Her eyes open to see Waverly staring down at her with that same smile but with slight concern showing now. She blinks rapidly, trying to figure out why she’s lying on the floor when it all comes back to her.

 

“Don’t worry, dear. You ain’t the first father-to-be to faint in my shop.” Gus says amicably when Nicole finally finds her bearings enough to sit up.

 

“The back of your head took most of the impact.” She states and feels the back of her head for a lump. “Hard head.” She says matter-of-fact as Nicole winces at the pressure. The apothecary holds a hand out and pulls Nicole up with surprising strength.

 

“So, as I was saying…” She clucks, motioning for a now equally dazed looking Waverly to take a seat. “She’s about four months in, according to her calculations. That sound about right?” She looks at Nicole pointedly. She didn’t even need to think back to when Champ made it known to the world that he and Waverly had had relations. It was seared into her brain, and she’d written about it in her journal. _March 18 th._

 

“Uh, sure, sounds about right.” Nicole says, looking down at her feet, unable to even look at Waverly as she answers. She takes a seat in a chair opposite Waverly and finally their eyes really meet. An unspoken question passes over Waverly’s expression and Nicole nods. It’s nearly imperceptible as Gus looks from one to the other, beaming, but it’s there. _Of course, Waverly. Of course I’ll be here for you._

“No acting shy on my account! I know how babies are made! Nicolas! Give your wife a congratulatory peck! She’s gonna give you a child in a few months!” Gus exclaims, clapping her hands together happily.

 

Nicole feels like she’s ready to vomit, her nerves are so taught. But she stands when she sees Waverly’s calm, reassuring smile. She takes her steps slowly, looking for any sign Waverly doesn’t want this. It’ll be their first real kiss. Nicole’s first real kiss ever. She wipes her hands on her pants as she steps into Waverly’s space. She’s still sitting on the exam table and Nicole has to bend to reach her.

 

They aren’t even aware that Gus has slipped out of the room as their eyes lock on each other’s until they become blurry at the proximity of their faces. Her head tilts slightly to the right, her eyes close and her lips press into Waverly’s infinitely soft, warm ones. She’s afraid to move and break the connection until she hears a slight whimper and it kicks something into gear and her lips slide over Waverly’s and her fingers instinctively reach to thread in Waverly’s hair and she gently palms the back of her head as Waverly’s hands go to Nicole’s shoulders, holding her close as her lips part ever so slightly.

 

They breathlessly sag into one another as Nicole parts her lips too and is rewarded with Waverly’s wet, velvety tongue tracing them delicately. Her tongue pushes into Waverly’s now and her nether regions tingle at the delicious throaty gasp that escapes Waverly’s mouth around their open lips.

 

They break apart only when they hear a quiet knock on the door. They turn to look at Gus, faces flush, chests heaving.

 

“Hey, you already got her pregnant.” Gus chides playfully and their blushes increase tenfold. Nicole’s libido makes her head too fuzzy to lament the fact it wasn’t possible for her to get Waverly pregnant in the first place.

 

“Here are some herbs that will help with any further nausea and some supplements that are good for you and the baby.” She says, handing the bag to Nicole.

 

“Congratulations, you two. Come back in see me in a month or if anything doesn’t feel right.” She finishes, shaking both of their hands and leaving the room with a little wave.

 

Nicole’s attention falls back onto Waverly, who is absently ghosting her fingers over her lips. She pulls in a deep breath and looks at Nicole finally. She smiles shyly at first and then it falters as she slides off the exam table.

 

“I don’t even know what to say… I mean this is _not_ what I expected or…” She says as she looks up at the redhead with a rather plaintive expression.

 

“Did you want kids? Did you and Champ ever talk about it?” Nicole asks watching the brunette carefully.

 

“I think it was certainly expected, you know? We wanted to have our adventures first though.” She says with a wistful sigh. “Now here I am with his child, but he’s not here and…” Her eyes mist up and she quickly wipes them away.

 

Nicole silently stands in front of Waverly, listening to her as she works through her new reality.

 

“What am I going to do, Nicolas? I can’t be a single, pregnant woman. Even as a widow, I’ll be stigmatized. I feel like this forces me to go home and I…” She begins to tear up in despair.

 

“What if you were married, though? Gus already thinks we are.” Nicole says impulsively when she mentions having to go back home.

 

“Nicolas, you’ve been amazing to me and given time, some different circumstances, maybe, but now?” Waverly starts and Nicole can see her becoming more upset. “I’m pregnant with my dead husband’s child! Why would you possibly want to take that on?” She says, lowering her voice hurriedly, remembering they’re still in Gus’ office.

 

Nicole just gives her a dimpled smile and reaches up and cups Waverly’s face and brings their lips together once again, brief, but with all the love she can channel through it. She pulls back, her eyes shiny. _This is it,_ she thinks. Summoning all of the courage she has, she looks down into Waverly’s frightened eyes.

 

“Waverly, I’m madly in love with you and have been for a while now. I’d gladly stand in as your husband and help you raise this child.” She says earnestly as she looks down at Waverly’s belly.

 

…

“So, you gonna get her a ring?” Jack asks as he peers down the shaft, holding a lantern as Nicole starts climbing up with a shovel.

 

“I mean, should I? It isn’t like we’re really married.” Nicole says as she shakes the mud off her boots.

 

“Yeah, but maybe you should like ask her?” Jack says.

 

“Like get down on my knee, ring in hand for real?” Nicole asks.

 

“You plan on leaving once the baby’s born?” Jack asks.

 

“No!” Nicole replies incredulously.

 

“You plan on staying with her ‘til she tells you she don’t want you around anymore?” Jack presses.

 

“Of course!” Nicole answers, getting a bit perturbed at all these dumb questions.

 

“Do _you_ want stay with her ‘til your last breath?” He asks with a venturing smile. Nicole rolls her eyes getting the point.

 

“A bonafide marriage proposal then? Nevermind I’m a woman?” Nicole gets out as she drops the shovel mighty close to Jack’s boots. He jumps back slightly chuckling.

 

“Like I said, Nicolas, she’ll come around. Just give her a chance. She’s got a lot on her plate, she’ll care mostly that you are here for her.”

 

…

 

 

Waverly tries to concentrate on her chores, but she knows she’s fighting an uphill battle. Before finding out she was pregnant, she knew her feelings for Nicolas were growing exponentially. What she felt for Champ couldn’t hold a candle to what was in her heart for Nicolas. And now here she is with a forever reminder of her dead husband.

 

But she can’t be upset about it. A child. She smiles wistfully as she brings her hand up to shield her eyes, searching the creek bank until her eyes stop at the men carrying buckets to the rockers.

 

She watches Nicolas turn and say something to Jack and Jack throws back his head in laughter. She smiles, remembering their conversation at Gus’ and their walk back to the cabins, both still in a fog of surprise.

 

_“I still plan on earning my keep. I’ll do all my work up until the day I physically can’t.” Waverly promises._

_“I don’t expect you to do anything that will put you or the baby in jeopardy.” Nicolas says seriously._

_Waverly is quiet for a while as they walk back. She hesitates for a moment and then slides her hand into Nicolas’. He looks at her with mild surprise and then gives her that dimpled grin that makes her weak in the knees every time. Maybe some day she’ll even tell him._

_“You really love me, Nicolas?” She asks quietly as she looks up at him. He tugs on her hand slightly and gets them to stop and he comes around to stand in front of her._

_“I really do, Waverly. I know this situation isn’t ideal, but any child you bear I will love too, even as my own. And I promise never to leave your side as long as you’ll have me.”_

_“Oh, Nicolas.” She sighs, overcome. She moves in closer to him and gives him a shy smile. “May I confess something to you?” She asks, looking up through her lashes. She can see his breath quicken._

_“Your kisses are the best kisses I’ve ever had.” She says finally looking at him fully, expectantly._

_“Well, your kisses are the **only** I’ve ever had.” He says with a rueful chuckle but is quick to follow up before she can take offense. “And I’m confident I need look no further. I’d die a happy man if you were the only one I ever got to kiss.” He says as he leans down slowly, surprised when Waverly meets him halfway as their lips come together once more and they get lost in the kiss until they hear a horse and carriage approaching. _

_They pull apart slowly, all smiles until the carriage passes and Nicolas takes Waverly’s hand once more and they continue their walk back to their cabins._

She’s brought out of her thoughts when she hears Nicolas calling to her. He’s still standing on the other side of the creek and she begins to walk towards him.

 

…

 

Nicole crosses the creek with a small, shy smile on her face, nervously rolling the small gold nugget between her fingers that she’d just pulled from the sluice box. She stands at the bottom of the bank, boots still submerged from ankles down and looks up at Waverly who is watching her expectantly.

 

“Would you like to go to town with me tomorrow night for dinner? Just me and you.” She asks, not liking how nervous she sounds.

 

“I’d love to Nicolas.” Waverly answers enthusiastically.

 

“Great.” Nicole says, smiling more at ease. “I’m going to town to run a few errands. Shall I pick anything up for you?” She asks, hoping she doesn’t ask to accompany her.

 

“Uh, could you pick me up some knitting yarn? A bright, lively color, soft… I need to start making some baby clothes.” She says with a small smile.

 

“I get to pick the color?” Nicole asks in such wonder it makes Waverly want to cry.

 

“Absolutely. And how are you at building baby furniture?” She asks with a coy smile.

 

“Guess we’ll find out.” She grins back.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I went around and around with this plot point, not sure I should do it. But there are several things it accomplishes: Expedites them getting together, heightens the stakes for all involved, absolves a bit of guilt for Nicole not being able to give Waverly children (yes, I love children, sue me) and finally may or may not be the reason we see Wynonna pop up at some point.
> 
> I'll be honest, Guest's criticism of the 'pregnant woman' trope got me down. I mean, I spend a long fucking time and think about every plot point and research to write the best stories I can. It is not outside the realm of possibility at all that Waverly would wind up pregnant. There was no birth control back then... 
> 
> Anyway, those who write, know we are sensitive types and sometimes it just takes one cranky, critical commentor to bum us out. 
> 
> I have no problem with people pointing out mistakes (thank goodness for DarkWiccan! lol), continuity errors, asking for clarification on something... but to criticize stories we write for free because we love it is a real wet blanket.


	17. Choose Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another late night post... Hopefully no mistakes! It's full of fluff, some sad news, and a familiar, icky face.
> 
> Oh, I did a tumblr. I'm old and barely know how to use it but... 
> 
> https://likeitmattersalways.tumblr.com/

Nicole straightens her lapels and then pulls back her curtain as she puts her hat on.

 

“How are you going to get the ring?” Jack asks as he turns the page in the book he’s reading by the fire.

 

“I’ll get us seated and then excuse myself saying I have a quick matter to attend to.” Nicole reasons. “The jeweler is right next door and will stay open for me.”

 

“Smart thinking.” Jack says, closing his book slowly when he sees the anxiousness in Nicole’s eyes.

 

“When will you do it? The asking?” Jack asks.

 

“Hadn’t really thought that far. Walk her to her door, do it there, maybe?” Nicole says with a shrug. “I want to do it somewhere private.”

 

“Makes sense.” He studies her. She’s a bundle of nerves.

 

“You’ll do fine. She’s already agreed to be with you, Nicolas.” He assures with a smile, seeing her calm a bit.

 

 

“Listen, when you both get back from dinner and after she says yes, I have a wedding present for you.” He says cryptically.

 

“Really?” Nicole asks with a surprised smile.

 

“Yep. Now go on and get your soon to be betrothed. Don’t keep her waitin’.” Jack says with a chuckle.

 

 

 

Waverly pulls her shawl around her shoulders a little tighter as they reach the wider trail that will lead them into town. The air is rather chilly this far north in the shade of the big trees even in the middle of summer. It took them all a bit of time to adjust to not having it go dark at night, but it sure was helpful for mining.

 

Nicole takes off her coat, leaving her in just her shirt and vest and places it over Waverly’s shoulders. She begins to protest but Nicole just walks a bit closer to her, their arms rubbing every so often.

 

“There, it’s like I’m being warmed by the outside of my coat.” She laughs and Waverly rolls her eyes.

 

“Thank you.” She says and pulls it around her a bit more.

 

 

They reach the restaurant and are seated immediately. Nicole pulls out Waverly’s chair waiting for her to sit before asking her if it is okay if she runs out for a moment. Waverly nods, a bit puzzled until Nicole gets the waiter’s attention to bring Waverly anything she’d like to get started.

 

She practically runs to the jeweler, knocking on the door heavily when she finds it’s locked. But after a few seconds, the jeweler opens the door waving her in apologetically.

 

“Thanks for getting this done so quickly.” Nicole says as the jeweler pulls out a cloth and opens it so Nicole can see it. It doesn’t have a gem in it, like the one Waverly had from Champ, but it’s simple and beautiful and the material was procured by her own hand.

 

He wraps it back up when Nicole nods her approval and as soon as he weighs out the correct amount of gold dust they agreed on, Nicole slips out the door, hurrying back to the restaurant.

 

She spots a man, tall, slender with beady eyes and a weak jaw. She immediately detests him.

 

“Sorry to keep you waiting.” Nicole says as she comes to stand behind her chair adjacent to the man talking to Waverly. Waverly looks up at her and Nicole can tell she is uncomfortable with the man’s attention.

 

“I thought it a shame a woman this beautiful was sitting here all alone.” He says never taking his eyes off of Waverly.

 

“She’s not alone, she’s with me, now if you’ll excuse us, we were about to have dinner.” Nicole says tersely, hands gripping the back of her chair.

 

“This is my husband, Nicolas Haught. Nicolas, this is Mr. Gardner.” Waverly says when the man doesn’t seem to take the hint to move on.

 

Nicole makes no move to shake the man’s hand. She just nods and then pulls her chair out, taking her seat. She looks up at the man pointedly and is a little spooked at the challenge in his eyes. She stands her ground though holding his stare until he finally relents with a smarmy smile.

 

“I’ll leave you two alone then. Waverly, if you ever find yourself in need of company again, I reside at the Melbourne Hotel.” He pulls a business card out of his coat pocket and slips it on the table and tips his hat, never once looking at Nicole after their little stare down.

 

“I’m sorry I was gone so long.” Nicole apologizes, looking at Waverly in concern.

 

“You weren’t Nicolas. I swear that man was standing next to me before you were even out of the building.” She shivers.

 

“Did he say anything untoward or..” Nicole asks, ready to follow the man and knock some manners into him if he did.

 

“No, nothing like that. Just the way he looked at me…” Waverly says. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, turning to Nicole fully with a sweet smile.

 

“Enough about him. Let’s enjoy our evening, shall we?” She asks.

 

“Absolutely.” Nicole says, pulling her napkin into her lap and calling for the waiter once again.

 

“I have to say it again, Waverly. You look radiant tonight.” Nicole says with a warm smile.

 

“You’ve already seen me in this dress.” She says with a dismissive giggle but Nicole looks at her seriously and places a hand over hers.

 

“You somehow manage to look more beautiful in it this time.” Nicole says.

 

“You have a way with words, Mr. Haught.” Waverly says with a crooked, pleased smile.

 

Nicole squeezes then releases Waverly’s hand as the waiter comes with their first course.

 

“Wow, this looks delicious.” Waverly fawns looking at Nicole as she picks up her fork.

 

She smiles at the woman, watching as she digs in for a moment before Waverly stops mid-bite.

 

“Something wrong?” She asks, rather timidly as she swallows what’s in her mouth.

 

“No, nothing. Just watching you enjoy your meal.” Nicole confesses with a smile.

 

“Nicolas, I will not eat another bite unless you join me. You’re making me feel like a hippo in a zoo.” Waverly giggles.

 

“A hippo?” Nicole laughs out loud, picking up her fork and taking a bit of the roast pork as Waverly nods in approval.

 

Nicole still sneaks looks though, so enthralled that she’s sitting here with Waverly, sharing a meal as husband and wife.

 

Of course, Nicole has had plenty of practice living as a man. Everything is pretty second-nature to her now, but courting a woman, pretending to be married already, this is all new territory. The way she feels for Waverly is so pure, so genuine, she’s afraid she’ll reveal her true self through some sort of act or observation that is so ‘unman-like’, she’ll be discovered.

 

And it is steadily in the back of her mind, trying to figure out the right time to tell Waverly. If their kisses were any indication, she believes at some point Waverly will want to be intimate. She also wants that too. _Boy, does she want that._ She thinks perhaps this pregnancy is more than one kind of blessing, it’s also blessing in disguise, as she hopes it buys her time.

 

On the walk back home, Nicole fidgets with the ring, still wrapped in cloth, deep down in her pocket. She’s still trying to understand how she went from pining over Waverly to being her ‘husband’ with a child on the way. She shakes her head in disbelief.

 

She feels Waverly start to slow until she’s stopped walking. Nicole stops as well looking at her quizzically.

“Nicolas, I know you said you love me and you are ready to be by my side… but are you _sure_? I’m carrying another man’s child… and I know this is _not_ what you came up to the Klondike for. I just… I need to know, is this what you really want?” Waverly finishes, near tears.

 

Nicole takes a breath, thinking of her words carefully. She hopes she’s not setting them up for total disaster and heartache, but she feels she has little option at this point. The full brunt of the guilt she’s been harboring by being duplicitous is hitting her now, but she shoves it aside, having no other choice but to trust Jack’s words. _She’ll come around. She just needs to know you’ll be there for her.. Anyone with eyes knows you belong together..._   

 

“Well, first, I must ask you if this is what _you_ want? I’m ready to be with you, Waverly. I would have chosen you regardless. My question to you is, if you weren’t with child, would you still choose me?” Nicole asks, eyes round, searching.

 

Waverly regards her for a long time and Nicole stands steadfast, steeling her heart for whatever Waverly has to say.

 

She’s had only a few days to really think about this. Even less when she really considers it. They both wordlessly went with Gus’ assumption they were already married, thus putting them together without much choice. Either could have corrected her though. She knows that. The truth is, she’d had no desire to. Her only real concern was if Nicolas really wanted this. He’s answered loud and clear.

 

“My first emotion when Gus told me I was pregnant was not shock or surprise. It was disappointment.” Waverly says, hanging her head for a second before looking up at the redhead. “I was disappointed it wasn’t yours.”

 

Nicole is so surprised by Waverly’s words she almost misses the answer to her important question.

 

“So my answer is yes. I would still choose you.” She says, solemnly, reaching out and taking Nicole’s hand.

 

Nicole ducks her head for a moment, trying to collect her thoughts and get her emotions in check. She reaches into her pocket with her free hand and pulls out the cloth and gets down to one knee.

 

Waverly smiles slowly and watches Nicole carefully as she gently pulls out of Waverly’s hand to unfold the cloth.

 

“I know that we won’t have a ceremony here, seeing as we are supposed to already be married, but I had this ring made for you. And when we get back down to the States, I will gladly make this official.” She says as she pulls the ring out and takes Waverly’s hand. It’s shaking slightly and Nicole looks up to her worriedly. She’s met with a warm, affectionate smile as she slips the ring on. It’s a perfect fit.

 

“Oh Nicolas, is this from..?” She says as she brings her finger up to inspect the ring.

 

“Yep, from our mine.” She smiles proudly.

 

Waverly takes Nicole’s face in her hands and leads her back up to a stand position.

 

“It’s beautiful, thank you so much.” She says, tears now forming in her eyes.

 

“I was going to do this back at your cabin, but now felt right.” Nicole says with a smile.

 

“I agree.” Waverly giggles. “Let’s go show Jack. He’s going to tease you so much.” She says with mirth.

 

“Yes, I have a feeling he will. Besides, he says he has a wedding present for us.” Nicole comments as she pulls her coat a bit tighter around Waverly’s shoulders. “Let’s get you home.”

 

…

 

        

They walk into the cabin still engaged in an animated, funny childhood story about Waverly and her two sisters when they see Jack standing near the fire with a serious look on his face. It sobers the couple immediately.

 

“Jack?” Nicole asks, walking towards him. Jack’s eyes go to Waverly’s hand and he notices the ring. He smiles and puts out a hand to Nicole.

 

“Congrats, Nicolas.” He says with emotion. Nicole shakes his hand, but still has a concerned and puzzled look on her face.

 

“So, your wedding gift. It’s kind of two-fold.” He says slowly. “First, this.” He says and hands Nicole a flyer for a San Francisco newspaper with the words: _Writers Wanted._ She looks up at him, brows furrowed.

 

“I’ve been traveling around this continent looking for adventure and experience and I’ve gotta say the Klondike was the ultimate. Meeting you and Waverly has been the highlight of it all. But, I think I know my calling now.” He says looking down at the flyer as Nicole passes it to Waverly. She reads it and looks up, tears beginning to form. “No more third wheel.” He says with a rueful smile.

 

“When do you leave?” Nicole asks. She knew this day was coming, just not this soon.

 

“Not for another month, so don’t go falling apart too quickly.” He says with a smirk as he looks at Waverly with a wink.

 

“But, I’d like to ask that I stay on with you until then. Helping to work your mine for whatever percentage you deem fair.” He says as he hands her the second paper he had. It’s the deed to the claim, with only one name on it: Nicolas Haught.

 

“What is this?” Nicole asks in shock.

 

“It’s your wedding present. Sole ownership of the claim.” He smiles wide, rather proud of himself as Nicole plops down in a nearby chair.

 

“You can’t… I mean…” The redhead stutters as she looks from Jack to an equally shocked Waverly.

 

“I can, I did, it’s official, notarized and all. Your gonna need all you can squeeze out of this claim, Nicolas.” He says, clapping Nicole on the shoulder.

 

“I don’t even know what to say.” Nicole replies quietly.

 

“Say thank you.” Jack supplies cheekily. He grows serious however and looks at Waverly gesturing her to take seat.

“I do have one favor to ask.” He says and calls Yukon over from his blanket in the corner of the cabin by his bed. He sits down obediently and puts his big head on Jack’s knee. “I can’t take him with me. He belongs up here.”

 

“Of course we’ll take him Jack.” Waverly says with a sad smile.

 

“Good, then it’s settled.” He says, surreptitiously wiping the corner of his eye. “Nicolas, can I have a word in private?” He asks after a moment.

 

“I’m going to turn in, gentleman.” Waverly says with a yawn. Nicole nods and tells Jack she’ll be back in few minutes.

 

They walk back to Waverly’s cabin hand in hand and it dawns on Nicole that Jack’s probably going to ask about she and Waverly moving into the big cabin. She begins to panic, mind racing. Why hadn’t she thought about that until just now?

 

“You okay, Nicolas?” Waverly asks in concern.

 

“Oh, yes.” She answers with a quick nod. “Do you need anything before turning in?” She asks.

 

“Perhaps a kiss goodnight?” She asks shyly.

 

Nicole smiles. “Of course.” She says and leans down to kiss her. Waverly puts her hand to her chest, palm pressing against her breastbone as the kiss deepens a bit and Nicole freezes, hoping she won’t be able to feel her wrap. She pulls out of the kiss as slow as she can, trying to hide her fear.

 

“Goodnight, Waverly. Sweet dreams.” She says with a warm smile, trying to hide her trepidation. She reaches down and caresses Waverly’s fingers, thumb rubbing against her ring.

 

“Goodnight, Nicolas. I’ll see you in the morning.” Waverly says. If she’s surprised by the abrupt end to the kiss, she doesn’t show it. She looks up and smiles at Nicole sweetly as she pushes her door open and slips inside.

 

Nicole waits on the porch until she sees her light her oil lamp and then makes her way over to the main cabin, deep in thought.

 

 

 

 


	18. Wynonna

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news: Update!  
> Bad news: Cliffhanger...  
> Good news: Wynonna!  
> Bad news: She's Wynonna...  
> Good news: Writing more today!  
> Bad news: Starting up another project soon...

Just as she had thought, Jack had asked her about having Waverly move in to the main cabin. But that would mean telling Waverly the truth and she was terrified.

 

“You can’t keep this from her much longer.” Jack reasons.

 

“I know that. I’d planned on telling her the truth before I told her how I felt about her, but that’s not how it worked out now, was it?!” She shouts in frustration. Everything had been sped up with her pregnancy and although it doesn’t change the way Nicole felt about her, the stakes are now so much higher and the longer she goes without telling Waverly the truth, the bigger the risks are of losing her.

 

“Okay, I know.” Jack says trying to calm his friend down.

 

“Tomorrow I will sit down with her and tell her and pray to the Almighty she’ll still feel the same.” Nicole says finally. “I’m going to bed.” She says wearily. Jack nods and goes over to Nicole, surprising her by pulling her into a rough hug.

 

“I’ll be out of here early working, but if you need me, don’t hesitate to call me over. I’ll talk to Waverly if you need as well, okay?” Jack says, holding her at arm’s length and giving her a supportive smile.

 

“Thanks, Jack. You are the best friend I’ve ever had.” Nicole smiles.

 

“And you are the best friend I’ve ever had as well.” He grins back warmly. “Don’t tell Yukon that though.” He chuckles and then frowns when the dog whines from his bed. “I’m gonna miss you, wild dog. And you too, Nicole.” He says with an earnest smile.

 

…

 

Nicole’s awakened from a light sleep when she hears footsteps on the porch. They are too heavy to be Waverly’s and they aren’t Jack’s as she can hear him snoring softly. She slips on her boots and coat and grabs her revolver, moving quietly to the door. She slowly opens the door, revolver greeting anyone first as she makes her way out into the cold. She sees a slight woman with dark hair and pale blue eyes in buckskin pants and a man’s woolen shirt and coat leaning on the railing with a worn piece of paper in her hand.

 

“Who are you?” Nicole asks as she pulls her coat tighter around her.

 

“Who in God’s green earth are you? Where’s Waverly?” The woman demands, standing and trying to look menacing but Nicole has a good half a foot on her.

 

“I’m asking the questions. Who are you?” Nicole says, pulling the hammer back on her revolver, but keeping it pointed down.

 

“I’m Wynonna Earp. Now, where’s my sister?” She growls.

 

…

 

“I still can’t believe you’re here.” Waverly says again, staring at her sister in wonder. She hadn’t seen her in years and is shocked that she knew where she was, let alone came all this way to see her.

 

“Well, Willa got me a message. I was out in Tacoma…working.” She answers cryptically. “When she wrote me that that sorry excuse of a husband went and got himself killed and you elected to stay up at the tip of the world, I had to see what was so appealin’ about it.” She says with a grin.

 

“Kinda see now.” She smirks in a whisper as she points to Jack who is pulling a bucket of the bank to dump in the rocker.

 

“Wynonna!” Waverly says, blushing at her insinuation.

 

“And what’s with that redhead? He sweet on you or something too?” Wynonna asks, totally ignoring her sister’s growing embarrassment.

 

She’s yet to tell Wynonna anything about her current circumstances, including having taken Nicolas as her unofficial husband and why. She simply introduced him and Jack saying they’d taken her in after having been on the journey with them the whole way. She’d wanted to sit Wynonna down and explain everything to her first before telling her what was actually going on.

 

“I have to tell you, Waverly, there’s something off about that man.” Wynonna says, eyes narrowing as she watches Nicole work.

 

That takes Waverly by surprise and she tugs her sister’s sleeve to get her attention. “Whatever do you mean by that?” She asks.

 

Wynonna shrugs. “I can’t put my finger on it.” She reflects, eyes lingering on the tall redhead for a moment before she pops up from her spot on the porch and stretches. “I’m beat. Mind if I close my eyes for a bit?” She asks, pointing to the door to Waverly’s cabin.

 

“Of course. I’ll wake you for supper, okay?” She says, Wynonna’s words still ruminating in her mind.

 

“Yes, thanks.” She says with a long yawn. She shakes herself a bit and looks at her sister for a few seconds. “You look… different… from when I saw you last.” She says, studying her now.

 

“Well, I was just a kid still.” Waverly says with a bit of bite. She knows Wynonna was never destined to be the stay around and marry and have children type. She was the one who hated society’s rules for women and bucked them whenever she could. But it had left her youngest sister with the burden of being the perfect, dutiful daughter. But she’d got out as well, hadn’t she?

 

“And now you are not. You are an adult woman.” Wynonna says with a rueful smile as she pulls her into a tight hug, releasing her quickly and entering the cabin, shutting the door behind her.

 

Waverly looks out over the creek to where Nicolas is working and wonders if she should go talk to him and explain things. She sees him look up at her as if sensing she’s watching but he looks right back down and continues to work. She sighs heavily and sneaks inside her cabin, grabbing the infant garment she’d been working on, careful not to let Wynonna see it as she heads back out to the porch.

 

…

 

Nicole is aware of eyes on her as she grabs a bowl and goes to the big pot of rabbit stew, grabbing the ladle and pouring a generous amount in her bowl. She almost offers it to Waverly, but decides against it, the hurt at Waverly not telling her sister who she is to her gnawing at her. She’s aware of the hypocritical nature of her thoughts, but right now she can do nothing about it. Not with the subtle scrutiny she feels coming from Waverly’s sister.

 

She’d initially been really excited to meet her once the awkward first exchange was out of the way, but Waverly had acted quite cool and formal when introducing her and Jack as simply people she had been taken in by and worked for.

 

She knows Waverly must have caught the hurt in her eyes, but they hadn’t had a moment alone to talk. It makes her uneasy that she’d been unable to have her talk with Waverly this morning like she’d planned to. She doesn’t see it happening anytime soon either with her sister now here.

 

“So, Nicolas, where are you from?” Wynonna asks conversationally, but Nicole senses it as pointed inquiry.

 

“Born in Montana. Left home at twenty to find my own way.” She answers.

 

“What brought you up to the Klondike?” She continues as she makes a point to watch Jack serve Waverly who had been at the kitchen cutting up some quick bread.

 

“Same as anyone I guess. To find enough gold to do what I want with my life.” She replies, watching as Jack sets the bowl down for Waverly before sitting down with his across from her. He gives her a slightly chagrined look and she brushes it off. All she wants to do is eat so she can get back out to the mine and out from under Wynonna’s interrogative eye.

 

“And what is it you want to do?” Wynonna presses. They all hear Waverly set her knife down a bit hard and return to the table with a cloth filled with bread. She sets it down in the middle and unfolds it.

 

“Here Wynonna, I know you must be starving. Stew’s nice and fresh too, Nicolas brings me a rabbit from his traps every morning.” She says, smiling at the redhead warmly with a hint of apology. Nicole acknowledges her with a slight nod, but there’s no smile behind it. She turns back to Wynonna, intent on answering any question the woman has.

 

“I want to buy a ranch, somewhere out west. Raise some cattle, pigs, the like.” She says meeting Wynonna’s eyes.

 

“Jack here is leaving us to become a writer.” Waverly pipes up with enthusiasm, trying to break the strange tension that has developed between Wynonna and Nicolas.

 

“Oh. So you’re staying on with Nicolas? Or had you planned on going back home at some point?” Wynonna finally asks.

 

There’s a small noise that comes from Waverly and all turn to look at her. Nicole holds her breath as the silence stretches a bit too long.

 

“Nicolas and I… Well, we’re married.” Waverly finally says. She holds up her hand and shows Wynonna the simple gold band. She isn’t looking down at it though, she’s looking right at Nicole.

 

“I’m no fan of Champ. But how long has the guy been in the ground? Two, three months?” Wynonna asks rhetorically. “What’s the rush to marry my sister, sir?”

 

“Wynonna!” Waverly shouts, incredulous at her sister’s behavior. “You walk yourself out of my life for _years_ and you think you have the right to walk back into it and _judge_ me?”

 

Wynonna visibly deflates as her younger sister stares at her, eyes measured and angry. Nicole waits for her to explain that she’s pregnant, but she remains silent and obstinate, staring at her sister with disbelief.

 

“I’m going back to work. Jack?” Nicole says, looking at the man who looks like he wants to be anywhere but sitting at that table. He nods quickly.

 

Waverly watches Nicole worriedly as she pushes her untouched bowl of food away from her, stands and heads for the rack to grab her coat before going outside.

 

“Nicolas.” She hears Waverly’s shaky, tentative voice call out. She sighs and turns around, looking at her expectantly. “At least take some bread. You hardly touched your stew.” Her voice is filled with concern and regret, but Nicole’s heart hurts and she’s scared of what’s going to come out of this surprise visit from Waverly’s sister.

 

“I’ll be fine.” She says curtly and continues on out the door and back to the mine.

 

…

 

 

Nicole keeps her distance from Wynonna, which means she’s not talking much to Waverly either. She doesn’t know what Waverly has told her beyond them being ‘married’ and decides to just steer clear of the situation for now and concentrate on finding another productive pay streak as the one they’d dug out had run dry.

 

She and Jack work about 14-16 hours a day digging, taking advantage of the warming ground. They are able to clear a few feet a day. It’s backbreaking work and they come up filthy and covered in sweat, but hopeful.

 

They share meals together and Waverly still does their laundry, but staying up and visiting in the evenings and even Waverly bringing their midday supper out to them and eating all together has all but ceased. Waverly takes Wynonna around and shows her parts of Dawson city in the afternoon and in the evening, Wynonna always retires right after dinner and even on the evenings where Waverly’s obligation wavers from her sister to Nicole, Nicole always tells her she should join her sister. She does see that Waverly is thoroughly enjoying having her sister, another female, around and Nicole sees Wynonna does care for her deeply and is making sure she is getting enough rest, even if she doesn’t know Waverly is with child yet.

 

This uncomfortable dance goes on for a couple of weeks until one morning, Wynonna comes out in old oilskin pants and heavy boots and grabs a shovel. Nicole and Jack stop, looking at her quizzically as she joins right in, not saying a word. Both of them just shrug and make room for her in the rotation.

 

They all work side by side for hours until Jack goes to cut down some trees to build for their tunnel support, leaving Nicole and Wynonna alone to dig.

 

“My sister told me a lot about you.” Wynonna says as she grabs a lantern, taking it deeper into the tunnel with them. Nicole stays silent but keeps digging.

 

“Told me how from day one you’ve treated her better than her own husband. Not that that was hard to do, I’m sure. Champ was always...”

 

“Selfish? Pig headed? I got that right away. He almost got your sister killed, she tell you that?” Nicole finally stops digging and looks at the woman evenly.

 

“She told me that you love her. She’s completely smitten with you, so happy to be your wife and that’s what vexes me.” Wynonna says softly, the tone belying the rancor in her eyes.

Nicole’s eyes narrow at first in confusion until Wynonna grabs the lantern, holding it up to Nicole’s face. She sneers her next words: “It vexes me because _you_ are a _woman_.”

 

Nicole’s heart drops to her stomach and she feels ill. “How did you…? Did Jack say something?” Nicole sputters out, feeling the damp, heavy air closing in around her as Wynonna continues to stare at her.

 

“Jack was keeping your perverted secret too?” Wynonna asks incredulously.

 

“How did you know then?” Nicole asks again, feeling utter panic take over.

 

“I knew something wasn’t right with you. I went through your stuff and found your journal.” She admits, unrepentant.

 

“You… had no right!” Nicole shouts, her panic quickly turning to anger.

 

“You had no right to lie to my sister! Taking advantage of her like that! You sick, twisted…” Wynonna snarls as she takes a step towards her.

 

“I was going to tell her but then…” She starts, but closes her mouth abruptly. She still doesn’t know if Waverly said anything about her pregnancy and she was not about to complicate this any further than it is on her own.

 

“But then what? You waiting to force yourself on her? You unnatural creature.” She says low and menacing.

 

“No, God. Wynonna! Please! Let me be the one to tell her. I do love her. She’s…” Nicole pleads.

 

“She already knows, _Nicolas_. I told her this morning.”


	19. Heart of Gold

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geez, ya'll guiltin' me into posting this... lol
> 
> I hope you'll see a little more sense to Wynonna's reaction and see where Waverly's coming from too... 
> 
> Thanks for all the hilarious, heartfelt, insane comments. I read them all and respond when I can. They are certainly motivation!

Nicole drops her shovel and runs out of the tunnel, side-stepping equipment, rocks, a bewildered looking Jack, crossing the creek in three giant leaps until she’s at Waverly’s cabin door. She knocks softly and when she hears a teary _come in_ , she pushes the door open, not even taking a second to remove her boots.

 

She’s covered in dirt, drenched in sweat and shaking. She approaches Waverly, but not too closely as she sits on her bed, eyes red and swollen from crying.

 

“Is it true?” She asks, breathless, voice shaky. Nicole nods slowly, wide eyes glued to Waverly’s. To Waverly, she reminds her of a frightened animal.

 

“Why?”

 

 _Why?_ Why did she lie? Why is she living her life as a man? Why did she tell her she’d be her husband, love her and raise her child as her own? So many why’s and she’s not sure which one she’s asking. But there’s an answer to all of them and the most important one is this:

 

“Because I love you.” She says, standing still, dripping water, mud, sweat, eyes so scared.

 

“But you’re a.. you’re a woman.” Waverly says plaintively.

 

“I am.” Nicole says, emboldened by the fact Waverly hasn’t hit her or screamed at her or worse, packed up everything and left. _There’s still time for all of that_ , she reminds herself though.

 

“Why did you not tell me the truth earlier?” Waverly asks. She looks at the leather-bound journal sitting next to her and picks it up, putting it in her lap.

 

Nicole stills and nods at it. “Did you read it?” She asks, shaken. Even though her biggest secret is out, she still wrote quite a bit about Waverly, private thoughts she didn’t want anyone, especially Waverly, to read. She’d also wrote at length about her dislike and jealousy of Champ.

 

“I didn’t. Just the page Wynonna showed me that said who you were.” She says. She looks down at it for another second before picking it up and reaching it out for Nicole to take. She moves slowly and takes it, careful not to let their fingers brush.

 

“I’m sorry…” Nicole says when she finally sees the literal mess she’s making on the cabin floor.

 

“Huh?” Waverly says, not sure what part she’s apologizing for until Nicole starts backing slowly to the door.

 

“I’ll go get something to clean this up.” She says distractedly.

 

“You need to answer my question first.” Waverly says, finally standing and looking at Nicole, more in control of her emotions now.

 

“Ironically, I was set to tell you the morning after Wynonna showed up."  She says ruefully as Waverly looks at her with skeptical surprise. She doesn't blame her.  She continues. "But before that... it never seemed the right time. I couldn’t tell you on the trail, I didn't know you well enough and it was too risky. Then Champ died... I was, had been falling for you and I just didn’t know how to say it. And then Gus and the news…” She says haltingly, hanging her head. All of that to her ears sounds like weak excuses. “The real truth is I was so scared you’d be disgusted. You’d hate me.” She says finally.

 

“What’s your real name?” Waverly asks after a few moments of contemplating Nicole’s answer.

 

“It’s Nicole.” She says, finally dropping her gruff, deep voice and loosening her vocal cords. “I started living as a man when I left home. I knew I was… different. I knew I could never marry a man, have kids. I would have liked to kill myself before I lived that life.” Nicole says, looking up and finding a kind, almost understanding look in Waverly’s eyes.

 

Waverly takes a breath and then two. “You know, I was falling in love with you. I pictured living here with you for the life of the claim, moving to your ranch with this little one.” She said, rubbing her belly. “I dreamed of giving you a few more.” She says with a rueful shake of her head.

 

Nicole bows her head again. She feels her heart shatter. Her stupid, silly dreams were just that – stupid, silly. How could she ever believe Waverly would feel the same after finding out the truth?

 

“What will you do now?” Nicole asks hesitantly. She wants to just lay down and pretend this isn’t happening, but she needs to know.

 

“I don’t know yet. I still haven’t brought myself to tell Wynonna I’m pregnant. I need to sit down with her and see what my options are I guess.” She says as tears start again and she wipes them away.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I deceived you, Waverly.” Nicole says, trying to keep her own tears at bay.

 

“I have never wished something to be different as I do right now, Nicolas.. Nicole. Not even this baby’s timing, not even Champ’s death.” Waverly tells her with such desperate sadness it breaks Nicole’s resolve.

 

“Is it possible.. could you.. carry on.. with me as a man?” She asks, not caring how desperate she sounds.

 

“I don’t think so, Nicole. I don't desire another woman in that way.” Waverly reasons, not able to look Nicole in the eye anymore.

 

“There doesn’t have to be anything more to it. I can still provide for you, your child, as a companion…” She says, daring to hope when she sees a thoughtful expression cross Waverly’s face.

 

“But you desire me, as a man would desire a woman.” She says, not in disgust, more like resignation.  It cuts at Nicole's soul.

 

"I can’t explain it. I know in the eyes of many it is wrong. But all I’d want is to make you happy and love and care for you, keep you safe. To me, _that_ doesn’t feel wrong. And to the outside world, I would be doing it as a man.” She explains with a small shrug.

 

“But you aren’t a man. You can’t father children. And what if someone finds out?” She asks, her voice rising in fear.

 

“They’d only find out if someone said something. I’ve gone this long without being discovered.” She says, leaving the incident with Jack out for now.

 

“My sister did.” She says plainly.

 

“She sensed something and went looking. Trust me, I’ll burn this tonight in the fire.” Nicole says with a rueful chuckle.

 

Waverly smiles absently at her words and sighs sadly. She looks at Nicole for a long moment and then begins to speak.

 

“To be honest, I think maybe I knew, deep down. Knew you, Nicolas, were too good to be true.” Waverly says with such finality it takes all of Nicole’s strength not to break down and cry.

 

“I’m sorry, Nicole. I want you to know that I’m hurt and angry you withheld the truth from me, but I could never hate you. I just don’t think I can do this, with you. I’m not… _like_ _that_.” She says with a small tremor in her voice, her eyes sad but sincere.

 

…

 

 

Nicole goes back out to the tunnel, passing Wynonna on the way. She stops, eyes alight with anger. “You could have let me tell her. What you did was cruel.” She hisses at her.

 

“No. Pretending to be a man and taking advantage of a grieving widow was cruel. I’ve known women like you. They prey on defenseless vulnerable girls and turn them away from their families, their homes, turn them into…” Wynonna says through clenched teeth, her eyes boring into Nicole.

 

Nicole is taken aback by the anger and disgust in her tone. She looks at her, eyes wide. “Look, I may have not told your sister the truth right away, but that is _not_ who I am. Your sister needed someone and I was there for her, expecting _nothing_ in return. Yes, I am in love with her, but I’d never, _ever_ act on anything she didn’t want me to, because that is not what love is. I’d do anything for her, including walk away when she asks.” Nicole says, shaking her head in disbelief as she begins to walk off. She stops though and stares back at her before adding: “She’s going to need you now more than ever. The last thing she wants to do is go home and be shunned. Just find a nice, safe place for her that she can live her life in peace. She’s a hell of a lot stronger than you think she is too.”

 

…

 

 

Back in the tunnel, Nicole refused to say much to Jack, only that Wynonna found out, told Waverly, and now she wants nothing to do with her.

 

He tries again and again to convince Nicole to let him talk to Waverly but she refuses. “I was stupid, Jack. So damn stupid and naïve.” She tearfully admits as she drives the pick ax into the bedrock as hard as she can until the blisters on her hand make it impossible to hold the handle any longer.

 

Jack tries everything short of dragging her out of the tunnel, finally leaving her to collect the larger pieces of rock and toss them in the wheeled cart. He knows she didn’t want him interfering, but damn if he could leave with things being the way they are when they didn’t really have to be.

 

He heads not to the main cabin where he can see Waverly preparing dinner like always through the window, he heads to Wynonna who is sitting on the smaller cabin porch, reading through some papers.

 

When he gets close enough, he sees they are wanted posters.

 

“You have a pretty unorthodox job for a woman.” He says as he approaches her. She looks at him eyes narrowed until he points to the posters. “Buckskin pants, Colt Buntline Special, bad attitude. You’re a bounty hunter.”

 

“I prefer Marshall. What’s it to you?” She asks as she takes her gun out of the holster and opens the chamber, making a show of inspecting it for cleanliness.

 

“Nothing to me at all. Can I have a look?” He asks, looking pointedly at her gun and completely throwing her off balance by the request. She hesitates until he puts his hand up with an expectant look.

 

She snaps the chamber shut again and slowly hands it over, watching his every move carefully. He looks down the sight, admires the custom ivory handle and hands it back.

 

“Nicole’s done more for your sister in the last few months than I bet you’ve done for her her whole life.” Jack says as he looks over towards the tunnel where they can hear the hollow clanging of the rocks against the metal of the cart.

 

“It was never her intention to dupe your sister. She was going to tell her everything the morning after you showed up unannounced.” Jack informs her.

 

“She pretended to be a man so she could marry my sister.” She says eyes cutting to the tunnel and then back to Jack.

 

“No, she has been living as a man by necessity and happened to fall for your sister, who I might add fell for her as well.” Jack counters.

 

“On a lie.” She sneers back.

 

“Look, how a person feels about someone doesn’t always have to do with their plumbin’. If you’d drop your misplaced hatred and open your eyes, you’d see the specialness between the two. Why would you begrudge your sister a chance at real happiness?” He asks, pinning her with a pointed look before walking away before she could answer.

 

 

…

 

 

Wynonna elects to go into town for dinner rather than dine with them in the cabin. She’s got a job she’s gotta do here and she can’t very well find the person if she isn’t looking for him.

 

She pokes her head in to let Waverly know when Waverly asks her to wait for her.

 

They both step outside and Waverly asks to go back to her cabin.

 

“Wynonna, I’m pregnant.” She just comes out and tells her as soon as they are inside.

 

“What? Who? Jack? What the hell?” She yells in disbelief looking down at her stomach.

 

“God, no! It’s Champ’s! I’m almost five months along.” Waverly shakes her head incredulously. “I went to the doctor here and she told me. That’s where the whole thing started with Nicolas being my husband.” She says, looking at her sister. “Gus, the doctor, said she had seen me with Nicole.. uh, Nicolas.. and just assumed he was my husband. I was petrified word would get around of a single, pregnant woman and so I just never corrected her and…” She gets out in a flood of words, sinking into the chair next to her small stove.

 

“Well, until you found out _he_ was a _she_.” Wynonna points out. She sighs and looks at her sister, sympathy plain in her eyes. “How did you not know something was up? That he was most definitely a _she_?” She asks, really wanting to know.

 

“I saw what I wanted to see Wynonna. A handsome, sweet man whom I was well on my way to falling in love with and we’d never done anything more than kiss and that was at the prodding of Gus who thought I needed one from my _husband_.” Waverly shyly admits. She thinks back to those times, how blissfully happy she was. She waits for the disgust or discomfort to come now she knows the truth, but she feels nothing except sadness.

 

“She never tried anything else with you. Never tried to take advantage of you in _that_ way?” Wynonna asks skeptically.

 

“No! We weren’t even sleeping in the same cabin!” Waverly says defensively.

 

“Well, I just don’t like it, or like her. She _lied_ to you, Waverly.” Wynonna says with emotion.

 

“I know, Wynonna.” Waverly says, the indignation fading surprisingly quickly. She gets why Nicole didn’t want to tell her the truth and she can’t get the redhead’s look of utter sorrow out of her mind when she said she couldn’t be with her. But she’d never _considered_ that before. Having those thoughts and feelings for a woman.

 

She’s brought out of her own thoughts when she hears Wynonna get up and open up one of her packs, pulling out her Canadian dollars and counting it.

 

“Well, is it safe for you to travel?” Wynonna asks as she scrubs her face and bends down to recount. This is more than she’d bargained for when she came up here to follow a lead on a job and thought it’d be good to see her sister and see how she was faring without Champ. She loves her sister dearly and would protect her from anything, but she had no idea how to deal with an impending child, especially if Waverly didn’t want to go back home. Her lifestyle wasn’t really settled or even safe for that matter.

 

“I don’t know, but I don’t want to risk it. I barely made it here in one piece when I wasn’t even a month along. How long can you stay?” Waverly asks.

 

“Uh, I mean as long as needed. I’d have to find a job here. A place for us to live…” She thinks aloud.

 

Waverly looks down, absently staring at the stove as she considers Wynonna’s words. The thought of leaving doesn’t sit right with her at all, no matter what she told Nicole. Especially with Jack leaving. She knows, has witnessed multiple times how Nicole can take care of herself, but leaving her out here all by herself, now she knows her true identity and what a risk she takes every day she slips on those pants and hat and is for all intense and purposes, a man…

 

“What if we just stayed here?” Waverly asks with a shrug.

 

“Are you serious? Why on earth would you want to do that?” Wynonna asks as if she’s asking to walk straight out into the wilderness with nothing.

 

“Wynonna, why are you so… afraid? Nicole has been nothing but honorable, caring.” Waverly asks as she revisits something that really sticks out in her mind from this morning when Wynonna came running in with Nicole’s journal.

 

Growing up, they had never been an overtly pious family and Wynonna had always balked at social norms anyway. So why had she reacted so viscerally to Nicole? Was it because the object of Nicole’s affection was her sister? Was it because she had kept her true gender hidden? She feels that Wynonna’s reaction to Nicole seemed rooted in something specific. She’d stormed into her cabin, saying over and over again how she knew something was strange about Nicolas. It felt beyond just not telling Waverly the truth. She seemed genuinely scared for her.

 

“That’s how it starts.” She says so quiet, Waverly barely hears her.

 

“What starts?” Waverly asks, leaning in to hear her sister who had gone back into some kind of memory.

 

“One of my first warrants was for this woman, Gina. She’d lure girls barely into puberty, homely girls, and take them in when she convinced them they were too ugly to find a husband. She’d start innocent, offering them gifts for a little token of their affection until she had them doing things against their will with other girls.  She’d make them do things to each other while she charged admission, mostly to men, but to quite a few women too. She’d destroy these girls, Waverly. There families wouldn’t even take them back.  She'd tell them again and again how dirty they were and how they'd just go straight to hell.  She took any choices they had away from them and made them do things... unspeakable things."  Wynonna takes a deep breath and lets it out, trying to cleans herself of the horrible memories. 

"It's the deceit, Waverly and the fact she said she was in love with you... I mean, you had a husband!"  

Waverly shakes her head, disgusted of course, but can easily point out the difference between this woman and Nicole.

 “Wynonna. Nicole is nothing like that. She's only ever had my well-being in mind and it's been true from the very start.” Waverly says, realizing just how much she knows it to be true. She begins to tell Wynonna about her entire trip in regards to what Nicole had done for her, even when she was with Champ, starting with their meeting on the deck of the steamship to Seattle and even telling her about poor Clem and Jesop.

“No matter who she pretends to be on the outside, she’s got a heart of gold, Wynonna. How often can you say that about someone, man or woman?”

 

 

 

 

 


	20. Wheels Turning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I'm making my own damn self tear up with my writing... lol

After finding out the man she was sent to capture met an untimely death in a backroom poker game, Wynonna tries every day for two weeks to find a job that is not burlesque dancing, serving girl or working in a brothel. She wouldn’t last a day in one of those jobs without seriously maiming someone and she certainly didn’t have the people skills or patience for a service job working in one of the mining town service shops.

 

She’d asked about joining up with the Mounties but they said they had no spots and pointed her to the town’s sheriff, but was quickly dismissed on account that she was an unattached woman and she had no one to vouch for her.

She knew that the job paid the best and would make the most of her skills, but she couldn’t even get her foot in the door.

 

She had even less luck finding other accommodations unless she wanted to build a cabin on someone’s property. All the hotels were booked and even the ones that allowed for extended stays required a hefty deposit.

 

She comes back to the small cabin, dejected.

 

“Well, we can’t stay in town and sheriff ain’t hiring a woman, especially one no one can vouch for.” Wynonna huffs as she ambles over to her pack and pulls out a pint of whiskey.

 

She swings the bottle towards Waverly who crinkles her nose in disgust and disbelief. “Oh, right. Sorry, forgot.” She says, plopping down on the bed and taking a swig straight from the bottle.

 

Waverly goes back to her knitting, head popping up every time she hears a noise from outside.

 

“I’m not sure how Nicole’s going to work the mine on her own when Jack’s gone.” Waverly remarks after a spell of silence.

 

Waverly had overheard them talking and she knew that Jack would cancel his plans if Nicole said the word. But she insisted he keep to them.

 

 _“One of us should have our dreams come to fruition.”_ She’d heard Nicole say. That had stung, but she pushed the guilt away quickly.

 

“I bet Jack would take you if you asked him.” Wynonna says suddenly as the idea hits her. “He seems like a real stand up gentleman… and well he’s actually a man.” Wynonna reasons as she gets up off the bed and goes to stand in front of Waverly.

 

She drops her knitting in her lap and stares at her sister with disbelief. “I’m not going to try and pawn myself off to him!”

She responds loudly and incredulously.

 

“But it makes sense. He’s a good man too, I mean he must be to put up with sleeping with a woman and not doing nothing about it.” Wynonna says, eyes bright as though she’s just figured out the perfect solution.

 

“Wynonna! He’s my friend! I don’t feel that way about him and I certainly wouldn’t take advantage of his kindness!” Waverly says, lowering her voice so they can’t be heard from outside.

 

“But you could, some day, I bet. He’s handsome, smart. He’ll be gainfully employed where he’s going..” Wynonna presses.

 

Waverly shakes her head slowly. It would be so easy, she supposes if she felt even a fraction of what she felt for Nicole for Jack, but she doesn’t and she isn’t the type of person to push herself onto anyone.

 

“No, I can’t ask that of him and I won’t.” Waverly says with finality.

 

Wynonna takes a seat at the small kitchen table and rolls the bottle in her hand thoughtfully. “You asked it of Nicole.” She says evenly.

 

Waverly looks at her sister in utter exasperation. “You still don’t get it do you? Nicolas and I were headed that way anyway. News of my pregnancy just sped things up. I was ready to spend the rest of my life with him…”

 

“Her…” Wynonna corrects bitingly.

 

Waverly sighs loudly, done talking about this and done talking to her sister. She stands up, tosses the baby blanket she’s knitting on her bed and goes to the door, pulls on her boots, grabs her shawl and storms out of the cabin.

 

 

 

“Hey Jack.” Waverly calls when she sees him heading back to his cabin. “You ready to get out of this desolate eternal sunshine wilderness and back to civilization?” She asks lightly, still trying to shake herself of the exasperation from talking to her sister.

 

“I’ll admit, I miss a warm bed, walls without drafts and pavement to walk on, but I’ve had the best time of my life up here. It’ll be hard to top.” He smiles wistfully.

 

“Well, I wouldn’t even be alive if it weren’t for you.” She says as she feels herself overcome with emotion, thinking back to what they’d all been through. “You are such a good man, Jack. Whoever is lucky enough to land you as a husband better know it.” She says fondly.

 

He ducks his head, humbled at the obviously sincere words. “Thank you, kindly, Waverly.” He mumbles and Waverly chuckles amusedly.

 

“I’m serious Jack. I’m glad to have known you, truly.” She says.

 

“Same here.” He says with a crooked smile. There’s a bark from Yukon that gets both of their attention and they look up to see him standing at attention barking at a squirrel next to the bench that Nicole is sitting on.

 

“And that fella… woman.” He corrects with a light shrug, throat tight with emotion as he looks at Nicole who is running a sharpening stone over her pick. “In all the rest of my days I know I will never meet another person quite like her.” He looks down and then right at Waverly. “She’s the one who convinced me not only to dream about becoming a writer, but to put things in motion and now that I have, I don’t want to leave. Not like this, not now.” He says and Waverly can hear his heart aching for his friend. She can also hear the blame he’s laying solely at her feet.

 

“Jack, she lied to us both. I fell in love with her on false pretenses. I’m not one of those people like she is, Jack.” She says, feeling more defensive by the second.

 

“You said _her_. You fell in love with _her_.” Jack points out. When he sees Waverly bristle, he holds up a hand. “I know she wasn’t forthcoming, but try and see things from her side. Anything she’s ever done for you, for me, has been out of genuine care and love. She wasn’t trying to trick you into loving her. She’s the same person. Just different looking under her clothes than you imagined.” Jack says with a shrug and then laughs a bit at the memory. “ _Real_ different.” He murmurs. That gets Waverly’s attention and she looks at him with eyes wide.

 

“Well, see, I kind of ambushed her while she was bathing…”

He tells Waverly the whole story and she listens intently, valiantly trying to _not_ picture the scene Jack was describing.

 

“I tell you, I will never, ever walk in on another man bathing again.” He laughs heartily but when his laughter dies down, he looks at Waverly seriously.

 

“Don’t measure what you feel by society’s ideal of what’s right and wrong, Waverly. Or your cantankerous but I’m sure well-meaning sister. Remember, we went to war over half the country thinking it was okay to _own_ people like animals.” He says profoundly. “If you ain’t hurtin’ no one, what’s it got to do with anyone else?”

 

Jack looks at her and watches as she continues to stare over at Nicole. He can almost see the wheels in her mind turning at his words. “Listen to your heart, and if it’s telling you that the Nicole you know now is no different than the Nicolas you fell in love with, find the courage I _know_ you have Waverly, and follow it.”

 

Waverly turns her eyes from Nicole to Jack, silently regarding him for a moment before giving him a small, introspective smile. _If only it were that easy,_ she thinks.

 

…

 

 

Nicole elects to stay at the claim instead of saying goodbye to Jack at the docks. She knows she would probably cry and she couldn’t have that. So, she simply leaves him a note in his pack the night before and tells him to have a safe trip as she pulls on her boots after they finish breakfast.

 

He expects and understands her reticence of course but before she can get out of the door, he quickly wraps her up in a tight hug.

 

“I know you told me not to, but I had to put a good word in for you.” He whispers in her ear. He half expects her to be mad, but she only thanks him with a small, shaky voice. Her eyes shine though and she smiles as she pulls away from him and holds him at arm’s length.

 

“You better write about me. Nicolas, the great conqueror of the North.” She jokes as she squeezes his shoulder.

 

“Already have the outline written out.” He says, not revealing he really does already have an idea in mind about his time up in the Klondike.

 

With a final smile, she picks up her hat and heads out to the claim leaving Jack to have one last look around the place. He smiles when he leaves a little sack of gold dust and a note for his friend.

 

“I truly hope we’ll meet again, Nicole.” Jack whispers as he closes the door to the cabin and walks over to say goodbye to Waverly.

 

Neither she nor Wynonna are anywhere to be found and he’s deeply disappointed. He leaves a note for Waverly on her bed and heads over to the road that leads to town.

 

 

…

 

 

“Gus, this is my sister, Wynonna.” Waverly introduces with a smile.

 

“What a blessing, you being up here for your sister. Will you be staying through to her giving birth?” Gus asks with an inquisitive smile.

 

“I will.” Wynonna answers with a nod.

 

“Oh good. I know that Waverly has that wonderful husband of hers, but it’s good to have a woman around to help.” Gus says and Waverly steps on Wynonna’s foot to keep her from saying something to reveal the truth. Instead Wynonna just nods vigorously and smiles.

 

“Uh huh.” She finally gets out.

 

“What can I help you ladies with? You doing okay Waverly?” She asks warmly.

 

“Oh, yes, doing well, thank you. Just need some more of those supplements, if you have them? How about you, Wynonna, need anything?” Waverly asks as her sister begins to peruse the shelves.

 

“I need a job.” She says with a sigh as she picks up a bottle of overly sweet perfume and promptly puts it back down.

 

“What is it you like to do?” Gus asks and Wynonna turns around ready to lay into the older lady if she sees a hint of condescension. She only sees keen interest so she walks back over.

 

“I’m a marshal by trade but neither the sheriff nor Mounties want anything to do with a woman, especially one who can’t be vouched for.” She complains with a shrug.

 

“Well, are you a good one?” Gus asks without batting an eye.

 

“Yes. One of the best.” Wynonna answers, straightening her shoulders.

 

“Then just have Nicolas go in and talk to them. He’s pretty respected in this town.” Gus says and Waverly has to hold in a giggle at her sister’s expression. It is true though. When one of the saloon owner’s little boys went missing, Nicolas was one of the first miners to come to town and help organize a search party.

 

Waverly turns to her sister and looks pointedly at her feeling a strange sort of satisfaction. She’s had some time to think about the situation with Nicole and how badly her sister had handled it, no matter her reasoning.

 

She also couldn’t stop thinking about what Jack said to her yesterday. _Jack!_ She thinks and asks Gus what time it is. She thanks her and flies out of the store as Wynonna and Gus look at each other in confusion.

 

…

 

“Jack!” Waverly shouts, moving as fast as she can at 5 months pregnant and in her long skirts. She sees him turn around just as he was beginning to board the ship.

 

“I thought you didn’t care to see me off!” He says with a chuckle as he holds his arms out for her to fall into.

 

“I completely lost track of time in town!” She says as she holds him tight for a moment.

 

“Well, I left you a little something on your bed.” He says with a bright smile.

 

“Oh, Jack… what will we do without you.” She laments and begins to feel tears fill the corner of her eyes.

 

“You will be just fine. And so will Nicole.” He answers confidently.

 

“I have been thinking a lot about what you said, Jack. I have.” She tells him sincerely.

 

“Good. I hope you come to realize the specialness of your situation.” Jack says.

 

“Oh, how could I not.” She answers plainly.

 

“I’m not talking about Nicole living with you as a man. I’m talking about the true love between the two of you. I’ve never seen anything like it. Most likely won’t again.” He squeezes her elbows as the ship’s whistle blows and gives her a radiant smile before leaning down and grabbing his satchel.

 

“You and Nicolas better name that baby after me!” He shouts loudly with a laugh as he runs to make the gangplank before they pull it in.

 


	21. Saint Nicolas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think you'll like this one. :)

Nicole walks out of Sheriff Nedley’s jail and sits down next to Wynonna who is reading the town’s newspaper, dutifully ignoring the redhead for a full minute. She reads the very last sentence on the very last page as Nicole people watches patiently before shutting it and turning to look at her expectantly.

 

“You’re in on a probationary status and you have me to thank, again, for the strength of my word, especially when I mentioned you were an Earp.” Nicole tells her, feeling particularly satisfied when Wynonna’s eye go wide with disbelief.

 

“I do NOT like using my surname. It slams shut more doors than it opens.” Wynonna protests as she fixes Nicole with a steely glare. “I thought Waverly told you that.”

 

“Oh, she did, but in the interest of full disclosure and me knowing how much you value honesty, I thought I should let him know.” She says with a smug smile.

 

Wynonna almost threatens to out her, but bites her tongue. She knows that the penalty for pretending to be the opposite sex is years in prison at best, hanging at worse. She also knows Waverly would never forgive her.

 

She pushes back against the bench heavily and folds her arms across her chest.

 

“When do I start?” She asks begrudgingly.

 

“Tomorrow morning, nine o’clock.”

 

“Thank you. I owe you one.” Wynonna mumbles and Nicole has to strain her hearing to hear her. She thinks about making her repeat it, but has had enough satisfaction with the situation for now.

 

“I would do anything for Waverly, and getting you a job helps her.” She says evenly, getting up off the bench and making her way down to the nearest saloon. She notices Wynonna is still sulking on the bench and turns around, her masculine swagger becoming more pronounced just to spite the older Earp.

 

“Come on, I’ll buy you a celebratory drink.” She drawls and Wynonna rolls her eyes and pulls herself up off the bench with effort.

 

 

They are on their second beer when a familiar face pulls up a stool next to Nicole. “Mr. Haught. Does Waverly know you are here having a drink with another…” He looks at Wynonna in distain “… woman?” He asks with a thin smile.

 

“I’m Waverly’s sister and she’s well aware we are in town together.” Wynonna says before Nicole can respond. She leans over the bar to look the man in the eye. “Who are you and why do you care what Nicolas does with his time?” She asks pointedly.

 

“The name is Tucker Gardner. I own the Gardner Supply Company.” He says with a smile Wynonna thinks is supposed to be charming. She hates him instantly.

 

“I’m Wynonna. Now that you know what’s going on here, you can kindly see yourself out of our business.” She says and then promptly turns back into her seat, dismissing him.

 

Nicole fights a smile at her bluntness, wondering if she realizes she just kind of defended her to this nosy, insufferable man.

 

“Good day, then. Please give Waverly my warmest regards.” He says as if he hadn’t just been dressed down by a woman wearing pants. They weren’t privy to his murderous sneer as he turned away however.

 

“He approached Waverly once when we were in the restaurant. Made her feel uncomfortable.” Nicole tells her as she turns slightly to make sure he’s truly left.

 

“Where were you?” Wynonna asks as she puts her beer down and looks at Nicole, judgment evident in her tone.

 

“I was picking up her wedding ring I had forged from gold I pulled out of our mine.” She says flatly.

…

 

 

They walk home in silence, each occupied in their own thoughts when Wynonna looks around covertly and then looks at Nicole.

 

“I’m sorry I outted you to my sister the way I did.” She says as she turns and looks back down the road. Nicole doesn’t say anything though, just continues walking.

 

“When I found out, it made me so angry. And jealous. You and I both know we aren’t meant to be the dutiful wives and mothers. But I see you and I see how easy a path it is for you, dressing and acting like you do. You get to do whatever the hell you want. When you say something, people listen. They treat you with respect. You can go anywhere and do as you please and no one bats an eye because they think you’re a man.”

 

She shakes her head slowly. “You even got my straight-laced, sweet sister to fall in love with you. When I found out you weren’t a man at all, but a woman, it made me irrationally angry, but also scared for my sister. I thought telling her about you was helping her because you’d been tricking her into… something bad…” She finishes, her eyes a tempest of regret and sadness.

 

“If you are looking for forgiveness, you’ll find none from me. I don’t know if Waverly would have ever been with me had I sat down and told her the truth. But I do know you took that chance away from me and I’ll probably always hate you for that.” Nicole says matter-of-fact.

 

Wynonna’s head drops and she pulls in a deep breath. “I understand that, and I accept it.” She says with a nod.

Her experiences dealing with Gina she knows has colored her view on women… who like other women… and she knows deep down Nicole isn’t like Gina. But she wonders what kind of life Waverly could have with someone who has to hide away who they are to the world?

 

…

 

 

“How did it go?” Waverly asks nervously as she meets them outside as they approach the cabins.

 

“She’s in, starts tomorrow.” Nicole reports and looks at Wynonna. Wynonna nods but makes no mention of Nicole telling Nedley she was an Earp.

 

Waverly claps her hands together in excitement, her eyes showing relief as well. She looks at Nicole wistfully as she tips her hat to her and turns to return to work.

 

For a second Waverly is torn between following her sister into the cabin and hearing the story or going to Nicole to thank her. She steps off the porch and catches Nicole before she crosses the creek.

 

“Nicole..” Waverly says tentatively. Nicole turns around and comes back to her, fairly close, eyes serious.

 

“If anyone catches on to me being a woman I can be hanged, Waverly.” She says lowly and Waverly’s eyes widen and she gets a horrified expression on her face.

 

“Oh, God… I didn’t think… I’m sorry.” She gets out apologetically.

 

Nicole’s face softens. I have to be Nicolas when we are outside our own walls.” Nicole says, eyes locked onto Waverly’s, making sure she understands.

 

“Of course, Nicolas.” She says and ducks her head. She looks up again as Nicole stands there waiting for her to say what she needs to say.

 

“I just wanted to thank you. For what you did for Wynonna. After what she did…” Waverly says, eyes downcast once more.

 

“I will not abandon you, Waverly. I made a promise and even if we aren’t… won’t ever be… I will always do what I can. Just tell me what story I should go by when I’m in town, and I’ll abide.” Nicole replies.

 

It takes a second for Waverly to understand what Nicole means by ‘story’. She still hasn’t told her she’s staying at least until after the baby is born.

 

“I think it best to stick with what we’ve been saying, if it won’t pain you too much.” Waverly says, hating how she even sounds to the person she’d professed to love… before…

 

“That’s fine. I assume you will stay on here then. You and Wynonna take the bigger cabin, I’ll move my stuff out after I’m done here.” Nicole says dutifully and turns without waiting for a reply.

 

“Nicolas.” Waverly calls out once again and Nicole turns, looking a bit impatient now. Waverly twists her hands, unsettled by this new, uncomfortable dynamic. “Supper will be ready in a bit. I’ll bring it out to you.” She says with a small, hopeful expression.

“No need, Waverly. I had a bite at the saloon.” She lies, not wanting to continue this awkward dance any longer either. It’s too painful.

 

Later that night, she moves her things into the smaller cabin, as Wynonna and Waverly sit by the fire, Waverly knitting, Wynonna drinking and playing solitaire with some old poker cards.

 

There’s not much for her to move and she’s done in three trips after waving away the sisters’ offer to help. She certainly didn’t want Wynonna near her things even if the cat was out of the proverbial bag.

 

“I’ll need the tub from time to time so I’ll just work that out with you two as needed if that’s okay.” Nicole says as she hoists the last of her belongings over her shoulder.

 

Waverly puts down her knitting, struggling a bit to get out of the chair and for the first time, Nicole sees her belly is indeed growing. A deep stab of longing hits her and she swallows the feeling away.

 

“Of course.” Waverly says with a smile. She goes the small pantry and pulls a plate out with a cloth over it. “I made you a plate. You’re welcomed to eat it here…” She offers brightly but Nicole just reaches her hand out for it as she hefts her bag a little higher with her other one.

 

“I’ll eat in my cabin. Thanks for makin’ one up for me.” She says and Waverly hands it over, her smile falling.

 

…

 

 

Waverly finds herself unable to sleep that night. Every time she turns in bed, she’s hit with the scent of Nicole as she took the redhead’s bed and Wynonna took Jack’s when they moved to the bigger cabin.

 

It simultaneously comforts her and does something else to her that’s unfamiliar, but not unpleasant. In fact it’s quite pleasant and it confounds her even more as she tries to close her eyes.

 

She keeps going back to the story that Jack told about discovering Nicole’s secret, in the tub. Her mind always sticks on the part detailing what he saw when he pulled the curtain back. _“Here I was expecting to see just a skinny, pale, bare chested man but what I got was this alabaster-skinned, well proportioned.. woman!”_

She finally drifts off to sleep and subsequently dreams of being held by Nicolas as they sit in a rocker outside their cabin but then it turns into sitting in a tub with a very female Nicole.

 

…

 

Nicole’s already outside working when Waverly wakes. She looks over at her sister and sees she’s still dead to the world. The sound of the rocker box normally isn’t enough to wake her up, so she must have only been in a light sleep.

 

She takes Wynonna’s timepiece and brings it to the small window that lets in enough light to read it and brings it back to Wynonna’s bedside.

 

“Wynonna, you don’t want to be late for your first day of work.” She says with a yawn.

“Take a bath, you stink of whiskey.” Waverly orders as she stokes the low fire and pours water into the coffee pot.

 

She hears a few curse words and a groan and then footsteps heading to the bathing corner. Seconds later she hears her peeing in the chamber pot Nicole got for them so they wouldn’t have to go outside like the ‘men’ did. That’s one of the questions she’d like to ask Nicole if she’s ever brave enough.

 

Wynonna pulls on boots and a coat over her night gown and goes to collect some water for her bath, still half asleep. She nearly stumbles on three full water pails right at their front door.

 

“Well, shit.” She sighs and shakes her head slowly.

 

“What’s going on?” Waverly asks as she comes to look at what’s got Wynonna stumped at the door.

 

“Saint Nicolas.” She sighs begrudgingly, moving so Waverly can see the pails full of water. Waverly gets a brilliant smile on her face as she bends to grab one, looking across the creek but not seeing Nicole.  "Hey, too heavy.  I'll get it."  Wynonna admonishes as she takes two ot them and goes inside.  Waverly steps out onto the porch to see if she can see Nicole but she's nowhere to be found.  Her smile slips off her face as her expression turns introspective.

 _Today_. Waverly thinks to herself. _Today I will start listening to my heart._

 


	22. Accumulations, Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoa. Very long chapter. Lots of narrative, so take your time! lol 
> 
> But I think you'll enjoy this one too. :)

Summer is hanging on to the very end in the Yukon and temperatures are still hitting into the seventies, which in a place that hovers under freezing most of the year, it’s downright sweltering.

 

Nicole is still searching for a productive vein, or any vein for that matter, of gold and is losing hope. Now that Jack is gone, the task has obviously gotten harder and their beginner’s luck they encountered early on is long gone.

 

With the summer sun never setting, Nicole nearly works the mine around the clock. She’s up at 4 a.m. working until 8 a.m. when Waverly brings her breakfast as Wynonna gets ready for work. She sits long enough to eat and drink half a pot of coffee and then she’s back to work until about 2 p.m. where again Waverly will feed her, most of the time bringing it to her as she refuses to stop. Finally, around 9 p.m. when Wynonna returns from work, they’ll sit down to a meal all together and then Waverly will turn in while Nicole goes out and works again another 3-4 hours. Most days Wynonna will come out after dinner and work the rocker as Nicole shovels dirt into buckets and brings them over.

 

Nicole had had to come to Wynonna for supplies the last two weeks and it really chapped her hide, but Wynonna was decent about it, not saying a word, just asking what was needed and she and Waverly would take care of it.

 

She was intent on keeping her promise to Waverly, wanting the soon-to-be new mother to have financial security when the time came for her to make her way back to the lower 48.

 

But Waverly was concerned with the long hours Nicole was keeping. She took to sitting outside on the big porch on a small chair Jack had made and doing her knitting while she kept an eye on Nicole.

 

She’d watch her tirelessly bring load after load out of the tunnel in her second hand cart and then break it up into the buckets and then carry them down to the rocker.

There she’d load the rocker, run the water through until it was empty and then bend down and comb through the heavier metal, dejectedly tossing out everything that wasn’t gold, which was almost all of it.

 

Waverly had wanted to help, but Nicole refused, being that the water one had to stand in for hours was still snow melt and way too cold for her. She had to be careful not to catch cold because out here in the wilderness, it can be a life or death situation for a pregnant woman.

 

So, she spent her time cooking and making pretty much an entire wardrobe for her baby. She didn’t want to bother Nicole at all about furniture so she’d planned on going to town with Wynonna after she got some more paychecks under her and they’d buy the necessities.

 

While she knitted and watched Nicole, she let her mind wander to whatever place it liked. Sometimes it would recall their harrowing rapids ride. Or what it felt like to get on a steamship for the first time. Her mind would inevitably go to the first time she met Nicole, as Nicolas of course. She remembers being taken by him immediately. Those warm, caring brown eyes, that dimple. How strong and capable he was. A leader, but never a braggart. Worked harder than any man she’d ever known to work. Would help anyone who needed it, _whether they deserved it or not_ , she thought ruefully.

 

She’d accumulate all this in her head about the _man_ she knew and then spend the next hour studying the _woman_ , the woman who had done all of that, been all of that. The reality of it, put all together, all the months and memories, it simply astounded her.

 

She looks now, not at Nicolas but Nicole as Nicolas and she finds herself in complete awe of her.

 

And it is on the last day of August, as she watches Nicole working so hard to try and still provide for someone who had all but dismissed her affections, she could finally admit to herself she was in fact falling in love again. Or was it still falling?

 

 

Waverly is outside, as usual, and she can tell the sun is particularly brutal. Nicole normally works in her oil-skin pants, heavy rubber boots, sleeveless undershirt, cotton Henley and then a flannel with suspenders keeping it all together. Waverly knows all this simply because she’s done her laundry for the last few months.

 

Today however, as she worked at the rocker box, she’d taken her boots off and had rolled up her pants to just below her knee. She’d shucked off her flannel halfway through the day and was just in her Henley with suspenders loose at her hips.

 

Waverly hadn’t seen much of Nicole’s body except when she was sick at Canyon City and even then she was in long johns and usually her pants and a thin cotton shirt. She’d been too concerned with her well-being to really look back then, but she was looking now.

 

She could see now the subtle shape of her hips, how she was much thinner than a man would be, almost like a teenaged boy. She had long, slender limbs and neck and her shoulders and back were held up straighter than a man’s would be under this kind of hard work. She’s sweated through the Henley and it clung to her showing back and arm muscles that were thicker of course than an average woman who did any kind of labor. Her hair, growing out again after her last cut a while ago at a barber in Dawson, seemed to want to curl a bit, especially at the ends where visible under the wide brimmed hat she always wore outside.

 

She wondered what she used to conceal her breasts, now that she could almost see a hint of something under the Henley and undershirt. Whatever it is it must be tight and she must wear it all the time, probably much like a corset but all the way up. _How uncomfortable that must be,_ she thinks.

 

Her eyes widen though when Nicole ducks down by the rocker box where the creek is the deepest, pulls off her hat and Henley and dunks her entire head and upper torso in the creek.

 

She comes up, sun glinting off her wet hair and skin and she now sees what Jack was talking about: smooth, alabaster skin with sinewy muscles straining as she braces her self for one more dunk.

 

She lets out a sharp, very feminine cry as the icy water douses her skin again and she’s laughing when she stands and shakes her hair out like a dog, making Yukon yip and dance around her. Waverly can see clearly a white tight wrap under her thin, sleeveless undershirt that has now gone translucent.

 

She quickly pulls back on her Henley and combs her hair back off her face with her fingers and slips her hat back on. She has no idea that Waverly has watched the whole thing with mouth slightly open and wondering how she could go about seeing more, because if this is what it was to have a physical attraction to someone, she’d like more of it and she didn’t care who thought it was wrong.

 

 

…

 

 

Waverly desperately wanted someone to talk to, but knew there was no one that could know her situation. The way Wynonna reacted canceled her out, no matter how much she’d come around. She simply didn’t feel comfortable with sharing her innermost thoughts with regards to Nicole.

 

So she realized she was going to have to go it on her own. She only had Champ to compare Nicole to and so she started from there and really there was no comparison from the very beginning. When she thought of Champ’s courting, which was quite normal from all she could tell, she kept coming back to the fact that she really had no choice but to say yes. Not only because she knew he had aspirations to get out of their town and that was her only hope, she knew it was expected of her to accept him as her husband.

 

The night of their wedding, she’d been expected to lay with him and she did. She knew a little about what to expect from a brief talk with her mother. She told her it could be pleasurable, but not to count on it, especially the first time.

 

Champ had been gentle, but not very thoughtful. He’d asked her one time if she was okay and that was it. It was over in minutes and he’d just rolled off of her, kissed her forehead and gone to sleep.

 

When she’d really realized how her life was going to be with him was a few days into their steamship ride to Seattle. But she was quick to resign herself to life as a wife, taking her pleasure in the adventure itself they’d set out on.

 

And then a tall, handsome, red haired man had seen her suffering from seasickness.

 

But that tall, handsome red haired man hadn’t turned out to be a man at all causing Waverly to question everything she’d ever been taught and taught to feel.

 

So there were questions… a lot of questions, racing through her mind. Ones she needed answers to before deciding on the direction she’d take for the rest of her life.

 

…

 

Waverly woke to the sound of Yukon barking and slipped out of her bed, dawning her heavy robe and slippers to crack the door open and see what was going on.

 

She’d caught sight of red hair near the tree line and stepped out into the frigid morning to see what was going on. She could see that Nicole was not quite dressed for work in the mine as she just had on her heavy boots and big wool coat over her sleep clothes.

 

She sees her rifle tucked under her arm and waits until Nicole gets closer to the cabins before asking what is happening.

 

“I let Yukon out to pee and he started tearing across the creek. Bear tracks.” She says and points up over by the bench near the rocker box. “Fall's here so they’re startin’ to fatten up for winter and probably looking for food.” She says.

 

“Did you see it?” Waverly asks, a bit concerned.

 

“Nope. Long gone by the time we happened upon the tracks. Still, we should all be careful.” She replies.

 

Waverly nods and then remembers her plan for the day. “I’m starting breakfast, come in and sit with me while I prepare it?” She asks and when she sees Nicole about to decline, she smiles. “Wynonna is doing the overnight at the jail. Won’t be back until the afternoon.”

 

Still looking like she’d rather not, Waverly tilts her head and gives her a small pout, knowing that from past experience, Nicole would not be able to say no to.

 

“Alright.” She says with a crooked grin that makes Waverly immeasurably happy for a couple of reasons.

 

 

 

Waverly watches Nicole dump the last bucket of collected soil from the mine and makes her way down towards the creek and puts her hand up over her eyes to shade them.

 

“After that last bucket come up and join me for supper. Then you are going to get a haircut and a bath.” Waverly announces and stifles a giggle at the wide eyes she gets from Nicole. She turns around before Nicole can protest and ambles her way back up to the cabin, caressing her growing belly and smiling widely.

 

Waverly is almost done with supper when she finally hears Nicole clomping onto the porch. She doesn’t want to seem like she’s been waiting for her but she opens the door anyway, seeing Nicole carrying two buckets of water. “I’ll go dump these in the bath and then get more to put on the fire.” She says with a small smile. Waverly moves out of her way and grins.

 

She’s set up a chair with a blanket under it and a pair of her sharpest scissors and comb. Nicole sees it and realizes Waverly is serious about the haircut and it looks she’s going to be doing it.

 

As she dumps the pails of water into the bath and takes them back out, she wonders what all this is about. She figured that Waverly making sure she’s fed was her holding up her end of the bargain of keeping on at the mine and keeping up appearances, and mostly making sure Nicole has the energy to keep digging for gold so this whole journey isn’t for naught, for both of them. She’s baffled at the haircut and bath however. Perhaps she looks that unkempt that Waverly doesn’t want to be seen with her in town?

 

She brings the last two pails in and puts them by the fire to heat and has a seat as Waverly puts a plate in front of her of roasted rabbit, potatoes, beans, biscuits and gravy.

 

“This looks amazing, Waverly.” She says, stomach growling audibly. She sits politely until Waverly has made herself a plate and sits down across from her.

 

“Bon appetite!” Waverly smiles and watches as Nicole takes her first bite. She grins as her eyes close and she groans in pleasure as she swallows.

 

“This is excellent, Waverly. You didn’t have to go through all the trouble though.” She says as she takes another bite.

 

Waverly levels her with a meaningful stare and Nicole stops chewing.

 

“You work nearly 15 hours a day in the mine, only stopping when the sun goes down. I think I can make you a big warm meal once in a while.” She says, her eyes softening.

 

Nicole says nothing, instead giving her a nod. She continues relishing her meal and after two full plates, she’s done and near asleep.

 

“While your food settles, come sit down and I’ll give you a haircut.” Waverly says, utterly enchanted at how pleased Nicole was with her cooking. It makes her feel incredibly proud.

 

“You really going to give me a haircut?” Nicole asks, eyebrows nearly reaching her overgrown bangs.

 

“Yes. You are starting to look ragged and I know you won’t take the time to go into town and get it cut, so…” Waverly says matter-of-fact.

 

Nicole adds in her mind that she doesn’t want to spend the gold dust to do it either. If she doesn’t find some sort of pay streak soon, it’s going to be a real long, terrible winter.

 

Nicole sits and Waverly fidgets a bit nervously. “It’ll be more comfortable and easier if you get down to your undershirt. Less hair and water to shake out of your clothes.” She says.

 

Nicole gives her a long, unreadable look, but complies, slowly unbuttoning her wool shirt, sliding off the suspenders, pulling off her ever-present Henley until she’s in her undershirt. She goes to the tub, kneels and dunks her head into the water until all of her hair is wet. Waverly is there with a drying cloth and she swipes at her hair until it is no longer dripping and makes her way back to the chair.

 

Waverly can see she’s a bit uncomfortable and she wants to put her at ease, but she’s not sure the questions she has for her will do that. But she needs to ask them.

 

She begins by slowly combing through her hair, letting her fingers graze the nape of Nicole’s neck and temple. Each touch elicits a slight catching of breath or a small tremble and Waverly’s wondering if it’s because her fingers are cold or Nicole’s affected by her touch.

 

“When did you decide to live as a man?” Waverly asks, trying to sound casual, but not sure she’s succeeding.

 

She sees Nicole swallow hard but she begins to answer immediately.

 

“When I was eighteen, I was promised to this man that was in business with my father. He was recently widowed and had three kids and needed a wife and mother to them. On the eve of my wedding day, I ran away. Didn’t have a clue what to do, where to go, but I knew I wasn’t going to be someone’s wife I didn’t even know. I bounced around a bit, tried to keep to myself, but as a young, unmarried woman… So one night after narrowly escaping an attack by a group of drunk, nasty ranchers, I snuck into a bunkhouse, stole some man’s clothes, cut my hair, and learned to be a man.”

 

Waverly pauses in her work and shakes her head slowly, trying to imagine what it took to be that daring.

 

“I found it easy, really. I was always tall for a woman, good chin on me, and the voice was easy enough. Mannerisms were not a stretch as I was a tomboy growing up. I just watched and learned in saloons, gambling halls… brothels..” Nicole says this last place with a bit of hesitancy.

 

As expected there’s a long pause and then Waverly asking, “Did you ever…”

 

Nicole chuckles and shakes her head despite Waverly still having a grasp of some hair. “Oh, no. I was never that brave, or stupid perhaps. I’m sure there were some that would have kept my secret, but I didn’t feel the need to risk it.” She says.

 

She feels Waverly pull the comb through her hair again and then begin cutting. She waits for the next question she knows is coming.

 

“So, how did you know you prefer the company of women over men?” Waverly asks.

 

Nicole is heartened by the candidness with which Waverly asks her question and decides to answer in kind, but not without asking one herself.  “Well, how do you know you prefer the company of men over women?” 

 

“I...” Waverly starts, but can’t honestly tell her how. She’s never ever thought she had the choice to even consider a question like that.

 

Nicole takes pity on her and asks Waverly to take a break and come sit in front of her. She does so and looks at Nicole with open curiosity. It emboldens Nicole and fills her heart with a sliver of hope. Hope she hadn’t felt for over a month.

 

“This is the way I wanted to tell you my secret, Waverly. Before your sister took the opportunity from me.” She starts with and tentatively reaches out her hand. Her heart catches when Waverly immediately takes it.

 

“When I was 13 I had this friend, Katie. We’d do everything together. I thought she hung the moon and stars and always pictured us being friends forever. One day she asked me to kiss her because she wanted to know what it would be like when her husband-to-be started courting her.” Nicole says, eyes going unfocused at the memory.

 

“It was then that I realized I wanted to be the one courting her and marrying her… and I got so scared, I stopped talking to her altogether. It hurt more than I thought I could imagine, but I couldn’t face her anymore, thinking how I thought about her. I think she knew too because she made no effort to ask why I stopped talking to her. She got married on her 16th birthday and moved away.” Nicole recounts sadly.

 

“I hadn’t felt that way again until you.” Nicole says, looking up into warm hazel eyes. “The moment I saw you, I think I knew I was in trouble.” She laughs a little. “As our trip progressed and I saw what kind of man Champ was… I knew, even as a woman, I could be a better ‘husband’ to you…” She pauses for a moment with a rueful smile, but then it slides into a frustrated frown. “And then everything that happened after… I was already so in deep, Waverly. My heart was yours to do with whatever you wanted, but I had this secret that well, I knew would probably destroy everything…” She laments with a sigh. “And goddamn it if it didn’t.” She whispers.  "I’m sorry if you felt I purposely deceived you or tried to trick you. Please believe me when I tell you that was not my intention at all.”

 

There’s a long moment of quiet as both women sit there, Waverly still with a loose grip on Nicole’s hand. Nicole doesn’t expect Waverly to have a change of heart, but she hopes they can come to some sort of understanding and maybe even friendship. But she’d always be in love with Waverly, there was no helping that.

 

“I believe you, Nicole.” Waverly finally says solemnly. She squeezes Nicole’s hand and releases it, getting up and grabbing up the scissors again. She doesn’t want Nicole to see the affect her words had had on her, not yet at least.

 

She starts again on her hair, this time allowing herself to really feel what it is like to be this close to the red head. She lets her belly brush up against the low-backed chair as she trims the back of Nicole’s hair and then moves to the side to trim over her ears, feeling Nicole’s elbow press into her as she moves in and carefully pulls her hair out away from her ear.

 

She nearly cuts her ear though when Nicole jumps and pulls her elbow back in shock. She stares down at Waverly’s stomach.

 

“It… the baby… I think it just kicked me!” She exclaims in a mixture of shock and awe.

 

Waverly gets a bold smile and reaches for Nicole’s hand. Nicole looks at her and slowly gives her her hand. Her eyes widen when Waverly puts it right against her belly where she felt the kick.

 

The baby does it again and Nicole lets out a sharp bark of delight. “Whoa.” She says looking up at Waverly and seeing a tear slide down her cheek.

 

“Oh, does it hurt?” Nicole asks, alarmed as she gets out of her chair abruptly for Waverly to sit.

 

The simple act erases the rest of Waverly's reservations and she begins to laugh, a hearty, sweet, relieved laugh.

 

“Not at all, Nicole. I think he’s saying hi to you.” She says as she brings both of Nicole’s hands now to rest on her belly. “Keep them on, feel.” She says a bit breathlessly and releases them as Nicole moves them around slowly, gently. Waverly closes her eyes for a moment, just taking in the warmth, the protectiveness, the promise of Nicole’s hands, if only she would choose her.

 

Waverly finally opens her eyes and looks up to see soft, brown ones, with a hint of a tear in them too, looking down at her belly with wonder and knows that no matter what it takes, she’ll find the courage she needs to finally follow her heart.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	23. The Bear

“Good lord, I hate men.” Wynonna announces loudly as she pushes through the cabin door.

 

Waverly immediately puts her knitting down and puts her finger up to her lips. Wynonna’s eyebrows furrow until Waverly points to the curtain that’s closed around the bathing tub.

“Nicole’s in there?” She asks in a whisper and Waverly nods. She cocks her head and stifles a giggle when she hears her softly snoring. “Is she asleep in the tub?” She asks in another whisper.

 

Waverly nods again and then struggles out of her chair and goes to put on a pot of coffee.

 

“You gonna let her turn into an ice cube?” Wynonna asks quietly as she pulls off her coat and boots.

 

“No, the water was quite warm when she first got in so I think she might have a bit more time before it goes cold.” Waverly says as she rubs her back as it had stiffened up from her sitting so still as not to wake Nicole.

 

“You going to wake her before that happens? Because I ain’t.” Wynonna says with raised eyebrows. Waverly scowls at her until Wynonna shakes her head. “I didn’t mean it like I’m afraid to…” She says and throws up her hands in exasperation.

 

She’s not stupid, she sees her sister warming up to the idea of Nicolas _as_ Nicole. And honestly, if she can take good care of her sister and give her the life she wants, how could she stand in the way?

 

“I’m going to, I’m just not sure how to preserve her modesty.” Waverly says shyly. Wynonna rolls her eyes, goes over to the curtain and yells through it.

 

“Nicole! Wake up!”

 

There’s a splash and then a huge cough followed by an intake of breath. Waverly’s eyes widen and she smacks her sister as she pulls the curtain slightly, but doesn’t look in.

 

“You okay, Nicole?” She asks worriedly.

 

It takes a second for her to answer but she does. “Yes. I think I fell asleep.” She says, still trying to clear water from her lungs while Wynonna laughs.

 

“Well, take your time. No worries. I was just sending my sister out for more firewood.” She says, looking at Wynonna pointedly until she huffs and goes to pull her boots back on and stomps back out of the cabin.

_I will not look, I will not look,_ Waverly repeats in her head when she hears a good amount of water sloshing, signaling Nicole getting out of the tub. She still has a hand on the curtain and she slowly lets her body betray her as she leans just a bit and peeks into the corner, catching sight of Nicole’s back as she reaches for the drying cloth on the back of the chair.

 

She immediately feels like an interloper and lets the curtain fall back soundlessly, but the vision of Nicole’s strong back, perfectly shaped bottom and long, well-developed legs is seared into her brain. Her body suddenly warms and begins to tingle and she wonders what it would feel like having Nicole’s skin against hers. She’d never, ever felt her body respond to Champ’s the way hers just did with a mere glimpse of Nicole’s.

 

She nearly jumps out of her skin when the coffee pot begins to percolate loudly.

 

 

Waverly has the coffee poured into mugs by the time Nicole is dressed. She pulls the curtain back and approaches the table, hair slicked back and her face still a bit ruddy from the warm water. Waverly shyly regards her as she puts her mug in front of her.

 

“Thank you again for the haircut.” Nicole says and runs her hand through her hair, mussing it a bit. Waverly smiles and comes close, sliding her fingers along the back of Nicole’s neck, smoothing the back of her hair down.

 

“You’re welcome.” She says, smiling as she sees Nicole close her eyes at the contact.

 

When they open though, they look pre-occupied and a bit sad. She takes a sip of her coffee and puts her mug down slowly.

 

“The mine… It’s just not producing what I’d hoped Waverly.” Nicole says finally. “I feel like I could dig up this whole damn place and still find nothin’…”

 

Waverly had had a feeling that’s what kept Nicole out there every sunlit hour. She fears the woman will work herself to death searching.

 

“I’m going to take on a small laundry service. That’ll help.” Waverly says, having thought about it for a while now. She’d wanted to contribute and knew this was a feasible way.

 

“No. It’s too much. You can’t lift anything too heavy.” Nicole says immediately.

 

“Hey, I know what I can and can’t do, and I can manage some extra laundry just fine.” Waverly says with a rather stern look.

 

Nicole immediately looks contrite as she wraps her hands around the mug and nods slowly.

 

“I’m sorry, you are right. I just feel like a failure. Like I’m failing you.” She says sadly.

 

“You could never, Nicole.” Waverly says sincerely, pulling at Nicole’s chin gently to get her to look at her.

 

“I already did by not being what I pretended to be. I’ve put you in a bad position, stuck here with me until you have the little one and when you move on, I’m not sure I’ll have much to help you get set up.” She says, nearing tears.

 

Waverly’s heart breaks at her words and she knows now is the time to ask if Nicole would reconsider their arrangement, this time making it real, now that there are no secrets to hold them back. She knows she’s ready to give her heart over completely to the red head and the rest they’ll figure out from there.

 

“Nicole, I…” She starts but is interrupted by Wynonna bursting into the cabin, arms full of firewood.

 

“We need more firewood cut, but I’m too damned tired to do it now. I’m gonna hit the hay if that’s okay.” She gets out breathlessly as she drops the wood next to the stove.

 

Nicole stands slowly and drains her mug of coffee and sets it by the washstand. Waverly gets up too, perturbed at her sister’s bad timing.

 

“I’m going to get back to work.” She announces, seemingly as irritated as Waverly with the interruption.

 

Waverly follows Nicole to the door and grabs onto her elbow gently and waiting until Nicole meets her eyes. “Hey, you’ll strike. I just know you will.” Waverly says earnestly and Nicole gives her a small smile and a nod before slipping out the door.

 

 

…

 

 

Waverly has her little laundry business set up within the week and is happy she has enough customers coming her way to alleviate a bit of stress from Nicole. With winter approaching they’ll need to stock up on supplies to get them through the harsh weather and food and necessities will not be readily available for months. With the extra funds, they are able to buy what they need for three people.

 

She has pushed off worrying about the birth of her baby, due right before Christmas, but now she’s only a couple of months away and the anxiety is definitely creeping in. She hopes Gus will be able to get to her if need be as she is not fully confident in her sister’s ability to help with that part. She’s a bit hesitant to ask Nicole, but knows she’ll be there if needed. They still need baby furniture too and realizes they have to do that soon as well.

 

She’s deep in thought about what she needs to do in the coming weeks when she hears Yukon barking. She sets down the shirt she was scrubbing on the washboard when the bark becomes a growl, not too far from her.

 

She steps out from behind a sheet hanging up to dry and her heart jumps into her throat when she sees a bear ambling up between their two cabins, sniffing the ground.

 

The barking and growling has alerted Nicole as well. She’s on the other side of the creek, just coming out of the tunnel, her giant, relieved smile sliding off her face when she sees what Yukon is growling at. She freezes, quickly assessing the situation when she sees Waverly in front of the main cabin between herself and the bear.

 

Sheer panic begins to make her vision tunnel and she runs through every scenario she can that will get Waverly into the cabin safely. She knows that Wynonna is in the cabin, but doesn’t want to yell and have her attract the bear to it. Right now he hasn’t noticed either of them, or at least doesn’t perceive them as a threat as his attention is focused on Yukon who is keeping his distance, but he’s growling, hackles raised.

 

“Waverly, stand still.” She tries to tell her as calmly as she can while still being heard above the creek noise.

 

Waverly is as still as a statue as Nicole moves achingly slow to try and reach her gun that is inconveniently sitting on the bench by the rocker some 30 feet away.

 

She keeps a slow pace, eyes glued to the bear for any sign that it notices Waverly. She’s almost three quarters of the way there when the bear picks up his nose and his attention shifts to the scared brunette.

 

Everything seems to happen in a flash and achingly slow all at the same time when the bear rears up and begins to snort aggressively. Nicole knows the one thing not to do, but she has to get the bear’s attention off of Waverly and she’s too far from her gun to grab it and fire off a warning shot before it gets to Waverly.

 

So she takes off back towards the mine, the opposite way from her gun and the cabin, yelling and waving her hands, making sure the bear spots her and takes an interest in her instead.

 

She sighs in relief when it drops down and begins moving slowly in her direction, leaving Waverly with a clear path to the cabin.

 

She takes her eyes off the bear for a second to see that Waverly is racing to the cabin as quick as her seven month pregnant belly will allow, calling for Wynonna to get the rifle. Her attention is back on the bear within seconds but by then the bear is already crossing the creek and charging right at her with Yukon on it’s tail. She’s able to grab her pick ax and get it up to her chest before the bear is on her and all she can do is get in a half swing before her world is filled with terror and pain.

 

…

 

Waverly stands as still as she can eyes darting from the bear to the cabin door. She knows if she can move slowly enough, she might be able to get to it before the bear notices her. Right now it’s distracted by Yukon so she begins to take a step. _“Waverly, stay still.”_ She hears Nicole call out and does as she’s told. She doesn’t even dare turn around she’s so petrified and prays to everything holy that Wynonna doesn’t decide to pop out and make noise.

 

She doesn’t know if Nicole is making her way to her or what, but the longer she stands there, the more she fears that she’ll just bolt out of sheer terror.

 

Suddenly the bear turns towards her and rears up and she knows she’s been seen as a threat. All the things to do in that scenario go through her mind when it suddenly drops down and takes off towards the creek. She turns and watches it barrel down to the bank and cross the creek, heading straight for Nicole.

 

“Oh God…” She whispers, and then lets out a strangled gasp and turns to race towards the cabin, screaming at Wynonna to get the rifle.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know... but it's the Yukon, people. 
> 
>  
> 
> It'll be okay... eventually... I promise!


	24. Almost Makes it Worth it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for all the comments and kudos! They make my day and keep me going!

Waverly doesn’t even remember racing after Wynonna as she puts the rifle to her shoulder before she barely clears the cabin door. She’s too far for the shot to be effective, but the second she gets in range she aims, careful not to hit Yukon who is trying to tear at the bear’s front right shoulder.

 

Waverly doesn’t hear the shots, all she can see is the bear tearing into Nicole as if she were a doll.

 

It tries to drag Nicole off, but Yukon is making it difficult as he has a death grip on one of the bear’s neck, tearing at it too.

 

“GODDAMNIT!” She hears Wynonna cry as she shakily reloads the rifle and aims again, this time close enough to get the bear’s attention. It finally, mercifully limps off, Yukon chasing it for about twenty feet before turning and heading back to Nicole’s body.

 

Waverly thinks she falls in the creek, but she pays her scraped and bloody knee and hand no mind. She collapses at Nicole’s side, eyes wide and blurry with tears as they go from wound to wound, gasping at the amount of blood, the ripped flesh.

 

“Is she dead? IS SHE DEAD?!” She starts screaming at no one in particular and then she sees Wynonna on the other side of her, her face grim. She puts her hand underneath her nose and watches her chest closely. She sighs when she feels air and sees her chest moving slowly.

 

“We gotta get her inside, get this bleeding…” She starts, not even knowing what they can do.

 

They are as gentle as they can be, but it’s impossible not to cause her more pain. She lets out a low, quiet moan each time they have to hoist her up or jolt her even a bit.

 

They half carry half drag her into the cabin and Wynonna does most of the lifting as they get her into the closest bed they can which is Wynonna’s.

 

Waverly rushes around and grabs every lantern in the cabin, setting them around the bed to get a better look as Wynonna grabs every scrap of cloth they have and puts them onto a nearby chair.

 

Waverly begins trying to peel Nicole’s shredded shirt off and sobs as she sees she’s causing Nicole incredible pain.

 

“Oh, god, I’m sorry…” She says through tears as she attempts to wrap or stuff the wounds that are literally pouring blood.

 

Nicole comes into consciousness and tries to speak, but it’s hard. She wheezes and spits up blood and Waverly quickly but gently wipes her mouth.

 

“I’m getting Gus.” Wynonna says and is at the door when she hears Nicole cry out a strangled, _No!_

“No.. Listen.. to me… I put claim…in Waverly’s name too… hit gold.. above bucket in back… of .. mine.” She says with effort as Waverly continues to find and press cloth into her wounds, barely registering her words.

 

Waverly knows they are running out of time and she looks up at Wynonna who was trying to listen intently to what Nicole is telling her.

 

“Okay. I understand.” Wynonna says and gives her a warm, sympathetic smile.

 

She picks up her right arm, the only that looks like it can move, and grabs Wynonna bringing her close to her face. “Bury me quick… No one can know… Claim will be for…forfeit..” She chokes out and finally passes out from the pain.

 

“GET GUS NOW!” Waverly bellows at Wynonna desperately, hearing what Nicole had said.

 

Wynonna looks at Nicole and then to Waverly not sure what to do.

 

“We can trust her, now go tell her what happened! She has to save her, Wynonna. SHE HAS TO!” She wails as she runs to put a pail of water on to boil and goes into her supply chest, pulling out anything that can disinfect.

 

Wynonna finally nods and runs out of the cabin while Waverly desperately tries to keep Nicole from bleeding out.

 

…

 

 

Everything hurts. Everything. If it isn’t searing, hot pain, it’s an immense pressure, like something sitting on her chest. She feels hands, or are they paws, teeth… she can’t tell. She wants to die. She needs to die to escape this insurmountable mountain of pain.

 

She hears voices, she can’t tell how many, but one is clear, insistent. “ _Put more pressure here... Push that muscle back in… Hold this closed… Lord above, I don’t know what I can do with that… I need more of the cat gut suture, Waverly…”_

She recognizes the voice finally. _Gus._ She panics as she realizes her body is completely exposed as they work on the wounds.

 

“I…” She croaks out and Gus stops, looking at her with concern.

 

“Wynonna, she needs more chloroform.” Gus says with urgency, stopping her ministrations.

 

“Wait. I need to tell her something.” Waverly says, going to Nicole’s head, she leans down, gently kissing her forehead and looking into the unfocused, scared brown eyes.

 

“You need to hang on. You need to live, you hear me? I love you, Nicole Haught.” She says with a watery smile. She takes Nicole’s uninjured right hand and places it on her belly. “We both need you.” She says, eyes glistening bright with tears. She motions for Wynonna as Nicole tries to get her tongue to work to tell Waverly she loves her too, but she breathes in the acrid scent and her eyes flutter closed.

 

…

 

 

Nicole has no idea how much time has passed as she comes in and out of consciousness, mostly in intense pain and sometimes feeling like she’s floating above her body.

 

At one point she hears singing, once again thinking it’s an angel and once again finally recognizing Waverly’s voice. She thinks she tells her out loud how beautiful her voice is but she isn’t sure.

 

She hears them talk over her, around her, sometimes whispering. She remembers Wynonna’s voice too, perhaps reading aloud?

 

There’s a time when she gets intensely hot, and then feels like she’s being covered in snow. She hears the words _‘infection’_ and _‘laudanum’_ and one that alarms her to full consciousness, _‘amputate’_.

 

“No.” She struggles to say, but her mouth feels like it’s filled with cotton. She tries to keep her eyes open but it’s hard. Suddenly, Waverly’s face fills her field of vision.

 

“Sweetheart, there might not be a choice.” She feels Waverly’s hand smooth back her hair and she starts to cry.

“We’ll do all we can. Gus is doing all she can.” She says and brings her lips lightly to Nicole’s. The fight immediately leaves her as her eyes begin to close again.

 

 

 

She awakes at one point, trying to sit up, frantic. “The mine!” She yells and Wynonna comes over, holding her down.

 

“Settle down, you have like a thousand stitches, Frankenstein. What about the mine?” She asks, trying to get Nicole to be still.

 

“Three days. If you don’t work it for three days, they come…” She wheezes out.

 

“Okay. I’ll go out and work it. I remember what you told me.” Wynonna soothes and helps her lie back down. “Now stop moving or my sister will kill me, okay?” She says as she goes to pull her boots on.

 

“Where is she?” Nicole asks with effort, the outburst taking all of her energy.

 

Wynonna nods over to the other bed and Nicole turns her head to see Waverly curled up as tight as can be with her swollen belly, fast asleep. “Gus went to check on her shop and come back with more supplies.” She tells her.

 

Wynonna leaves the cabin and Nicole lies still, finally feeling like she might be able to stay awake for a few minutes. She begins to take inventory of her body, noting her left arm is heavily bandaged from shoulder down to down below her elbow. She has incredible pain on her lower back and it feels very tight. She feels the same kind of tightness on the left side of her face, from above her ear, down her cheek and across her jaw. Her right hand comes up and her fingers trace a jagged line, interrupted by what she can tell are stitches. She peers down and sees bandages on her upper chest as well. She moves the blanket, peering underneath it slightly to see she is completely naked under it with various bruising, bandages across her breasts. They are still intact, but she can see a large, deep scratch running right across her left one on the inside of it all the way down her stomach. It hurts to take a deep breath and she knows from being thrown from a horse once that her ribs are broken.

 

She vaguely remembers having the pick ax between her and the bear before she lost consciousness when the pain became too intense. She must have had her right side partially protected she guesses, seeing most damage is on the left.

 

She’s afraid of the fact she can’t really move her left arm. She remembers talk of amputation and begins to panic all over again.

 

Waverly must sense her discomfort for she wakes up and rolls off the bed gingerly, coming to sit on a chair near her good side.

 

“Hey, you’re awake.” Waverly smiles warmly. She rests her hand on her right forearm and studies her for a moment.

 

“Where’s Wynonna?” She asks, a look of irritation coming over her features.

 

“Sent out to the mine. Cannot be dormant more than three days.” Nicole says.

 

Waverly nods. “You in pain?” She asks, concerned.

 

“It’s not intolerable. May I have some water, please?” She asks, licking her dry, cracked lips.

 

“Of course.” Waverly says and goes to pour her a cup from a pitcher near the washstand. She comes back and gently holds the back of Nicole’s head while she lifts it just enough to drink.

 

She spills a bit but Waverly’s quick to wipe it as it drips down her chin.

 

“Wynonna said I look like Frankenstein.” Nicole says, trying to give Waverly a small smile, but her stitches on her jaw pull.

 

“You look fine. There are not many people who can say they survived a Grizzly Bear attack.” Waverly says with a crooked smile, but Nicole can see the traumatic undercurrent in her eyes.

 

“My left arm? Shoulder?” Nicole asks hesitantly.

 

Waverly sighs. “The bear… tore into it with its mouth, tried to drag you. It separated at the top here.” Waverly says, touching very lightly over the bandages where her arm met her collarbone. “Tore through these muscles.” She ran her finger lightly down her biceps. “Broke the bone here.” She ran her finger laterally across her arm halfway between her shoulder and elbow. “Gus did what she could, and thinks you won’t need it amputated after all, but she doubts you’ll have full use of it again.” She finishes with her eyebrows drawn in sympathy for the red head.

 

Nicole faces away from Waverly, trying to keep her composure. How can she mine with one arm? Or even run a ranch?

 

“Hey.” Waverly says soft but insistent. Mindful of her jaw, she pulls her head gently back towards her. “You are the strongest, most determined person I’ve ever met. If anyone can find a way to do everything they did before, it would be you.” She lays her hand lightly across the right side of her chest, intimately aware of every bruise, cut and injury her body endured.

 

She’ll never tell Nicole this, but Gus gave her zero chance of living when she first assessed her wounds. Waverly wouldn’t accept it, however, and Gus set to work on the gravely injured red head.

 

After four days had passed and Nicole was still with them, Gus told Waverly it was a downright miracle, crediting their incredible bond that kept Nicole from succumbing to her injuries. Severe blood loss and shock alone could have done her in and then the infection that came was sure to kill her, but here she was.

 

“You sang to me again.” Nicole notes, changing the too- painful-to-deal-with-now subject. “If I can’t run a ranch, I can travel around with you and the baby, act as your talent manager.” Nicole smiles.

 

“My manager-husband? Sounds awfully complicated.” Waverly teases with a giggle as she runs her hand over Nicole’s good shoulder.

 

“If it was what you wanted to do, I’d do it in a heartbeat. Even if I was able-bodied enough to run a ranch.” Nicole says sincerely.

 

Waverly regards her with an adoring smile. “And that’s one of the many reasons I fell so very much in love with you.” She says sincerely, smiling when Nicole’s eyes widen in such sweet surprise.

 

“Do you remember me telling you that?” Waverly asks, eyes filled with emotion.

 

“Thought I imagined it.” She answers honestly.

 

“Well, you didn’t. So, let me tell you again. I love you with all my heart, Nicole Haught.” She says in an adorable sing-song that causes Nicole to chuckle. She thinks better of it immediately as the pain reverberates throughout her whole body.

 

Waverly looks at her with worry until Nicole squeezes her hand with her good one. “I’m alright. And I love you too. So much.” She says earnestly.

 

“I’m going to kiss you now, Mr. Haught.” Waverly says with a little smirk.

 

“I’m ready, Mrs. Haught.” Nicole intones back.

 

Maybe it’s because there are no more secrets, or because of Nicole’s brush with death, but the kiss they share eclipses the one in Gus’ office by miles. Waverly pulls back, eyes bright with emotion. So much love, want and promise in the kiss it takes her breath away.

 

“I can’t wait to be mended enough to…” Nicole starts, still dizzy from the kiss when Wynonna barges in with two buckets, each heavy at her sides.

 

“I think Nicole struck gold.” She deadpans as she dumps both buckets onto the table and Nicole nearly pops all her stitches trying to sit up and get a better look.

 

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph.” Waverly says with eyes wide as saucers as she looks over at the gold and then to Nicole.

 

“Almost makes it worth getting half eaten by a bear, huh?” Wynonna says and whistles low as she grabs the buckets and flies back out of the cabin.

 

 


	25. Scars

Nicole continues to make progress slowly. Gus comes to check on her almost every day, happy that the infections seem to be almost gone. She leaves Waverly with detailed notes on how to continue to treat Nicole’s arm and what to look for in regards to any complications.

 

Waverly has learned so much from Gus, she feels comfortable that she can deal with almost any kind of medical situation, which will serve them well when they eventually strike out on their own.

 

She’s been thinking a lot about that lately, now that she’s made the decision to live with Nicole as Nicolas. She knows day-to-day things won’t be a challenge, but emergencies are bound to come up, and they’ll need a plan. She hopes by the time they leave Dawson in a few months, she’ll have gained enough medical knowledge to take care of whatever happens. She can’t imagine anything worse than this though.

 

“You hungry?” Waverly asks as she prepares a couple of bowls of soup.

 

Nicole nods and realizes Waverly can’t see her so she gets out a ‘ _Yes_ ’ hoarsely.

 

Waverly carefully carries the steaming bowl over and sets it down on the side table. “You ready?” She asks with a small, supportive smile. Sitting up to eat is always painful with her arm injury so they have to go slowly and carefully.

 

Waverly readies the pillows and then braces her arm against the wall. With her other arm she lends it to Nicole so she can use it to pull herself up from her ‘good side’ as Wynonna calls it. Her left arm is strapped to her side and splinted but every move like this causes agonizing pain. By the time Waverly usually has the pillows set up behind her and slowly eases her back, Nicole is pale, sweaty and out of breath.

 

“It isn’t always going to be like this, Nic.” Waverly says with sympathy as Nicole takes deep breaths, trying to get through the pain.

 

Nicole has a curt retort ready. She’s already feeling the frustration settling in and knows she’s not going to have the patience to stay in good spirits while she’s laid up with winter and the baby coming soon. There’s still so much to do.

 

But the diminutive Waverly uses makes her pause.

 

“Nic?” Nicole questions with a raised eyebrow.

 

“You don’t like it? Thought it would be easy since it could be for Nicole or Nicolas.” Waverly reasons, unsure now though.

 

“I think it’s fine. If only _you_ call me that.” She bargains lightly and Waverly gives her a big smile.

 

“Okay. You ready to eat?” She asks pulling the bowl up to her side. It’s awkward eating this way, but Nicole insisted she could feed herself after a few humiliating attempts from the women. She hadn’t tried it with soup yet, however. Waverly sits a few feet away at the table, eating hers unable to stand it after Nicole spills her third spoonful and curses.

 

She gets up, pours her bowl back into the pot and comes to sit close to Nicole, taking the soup off the small table. Nicole is about to protest when Waverly takes a spoonful of it for herself.

 

“Hey.” Nicole pouts as Waverly dips the spoon in and brings it to Nicole’s lips. She opens and takes the spoonful, drip free, chews the piece of meat that was in it and swallows.

 

“We’re going to share if that’s alright.” Waverly says with a cute smile and Nicole cannot stay frustrated or mad for long. Especially when she begins telling her how excited she is for the baby to come. She truly is glowing and Nicole is even more smitten with the brunette as she watches her stomach grow ever bigger, waddle more and more pronounced.

 

“So, I was trying to think of names, you know, for a boy or a girl.” Waverly starts, pausing to bring the soup to Nicole’s lips slowly.

 

“You have any family names you want to pass on?” Nicole asks, freely admitting to herself that sharing a bowl of soup with Waverly might be one of her favorite things to do.

 

“Not really. I.. well…” She stumbles a bit, looking hesitant as she pulls up the last spoonful and feeds it to Nicole. “Jack wants us to name it after him.” She finally gets out with a chuckle.

 

Nicole’s heart soars when Waverly says ‘we’.

 

“Do you?” Waverly asks quietly.

 

Nicole thinks, no names coming to mind. She shakes her head.

 

Waverly gets up and refills the bowl, grabbing some day old bread from the pantry. She waves it around briefly with a grin and comes to sit back down. “Forgot I had some bread!” She says and dips a small chunk in the soup, not even letting Nicole decide if she wants to feed it to herself or not. Nicole doesn’t complain, she just opens her mouth for Waverly to pop it in.

 

“How about Nicole if it’s a girl, Nicolas if it’s a boy.” Waverly says with a shrug trying to sound casual. She meets Nicole’s eyes and she sees some trepidation.

 

“You don’t have to do that, Waverly.” Nicole says and is instantly concerned when she sees Waverly’s face fall, the bowl of soup sinking to her lap.

 

“I… I know it’s probably hard, taking on another man’s baby… I mean, even for appearance sake. You probably would rather not, all things being perfect… but also, this will be the only one I.. we have and…” Waverly starts to ramble, eyes looking everywhere but Nicole’s. “I want it to be ours. Yours and mine.” She says finally with a sigh.

 

Nicole reaches out and wraps her hand around Waverly’s wrist, brushing the inside of it with her thumb until Waverly looks up at her.

 

“I wasn’t aware you felt this way. I was treading careful, not sure what you wanted… But, I would be incredibly honored if you were to give the baby my name. Our baby.” She says, her eyes shining as her hand moves up Waverly’s arm to her shoulder and then stroking her cheek lightly with the backs of her fingers.

 

Waverly closes her eyes and leans into the touch. She smiles at Nicole, a brilliant, happy tear-filled smile and begins to feed her again, this time punctuating every other bite with a kiss.

 

…

 

Wynonna makes sure to work the mine every three days when she’s not working her sheriff job. Nicole can see she’s frayed at the ends, but she promises she’ll be alright, especially when Nicole promises a hefty payment for all her hard work.

 

 _“I would have done it regardless.”_ Wynonna had whispered to Waverly after Nicole had told her. _“But now you get me complaint-free.”_

Waverly and Wynonna finally feel okay leaving Nicole alone for a few hours at a time so they finally get to Dawson together to buy the rest of the necessities for the baby.

They are just about to enter the shop when they are stopped by Mr. Gardner, his eyes wide in surprise.

 

“Well, looks like the mine didn’t keep Nicolas busy enough.” He comments, staring down at Waverly’s stomach. His face turns into a frown though when he looks back up at her. “Sorry to hear about poor Nicolas, guess he almost left you a widow. Have to give him credit for not dying though. Grizzly Bear attacks are almost always fatal.” He informs them dramatically. “Give him my best, will you? And if there’s anything you need that he _can’t_ provide, you know where I live.” He says, tipping his hat and moving on past them.

 

Wynonna rolls her eyes with disgust, wanting so bad to pull her Buntline and make a hole in the back of his hat.

 

“God, he’s a vile man.” Waverly says, shaking her head slowly.

 

“Everyone knows it too, but he owns half this town.” Wynonna complains bitterly. She shakes off the interaction and turns to her sister with an over excited smile. “Let’s go outfit that baby of yours!”

 

They borrow Gus’ wagon and one of the shop’s helpers to get the furniture delivered and set up and once again, Nicole feels useless as she can hear them through the curtain Waverly came in and pulled across so no one can see how bad a shape _Nicolas_ was in.

 

Wynonna drove him and Gus’ wagon back to town as Waverly opened the curtain so Nicole could see a little bassinet, a small table for changing and storing clothes and whatnot and a finely made rocking chair for nursing.

 

“Did you get everything you need?” Nicole asks as she looks up at Waverly.

 

“I believe so. Now all we need is the baby.” She says with a laugh as she goes up to Nicole and rubs her arm meaningfully.

 

“I think the snow is about to start. What little light we had was eclipsed by some heavy clouds.” Waverly comments as she picks up the sheet and begins to inspect Nicole’s bandages.

 

Now that Nicole is feeling better, certain things have been catching her attention, the biggest one being the complete erasure of her modesty. She was too far out of it to really register that Waverly had seen her completely unclothed. She felt self-conscious to be sure, but it mostly had to do now with the amount of scarring she’s going to have on her body. She’d seen Champ shirtless and although he was a bastard of the first order, he was finely formed with strong features, muscular build, chest smooth and arms stock strong.

 

She couldn’t compare on a lot of fronts and especially now with her skin bisected with ugly, red, deep scarring. How could Waverly ever want to look at that the rest of her life?

 

Nicole turns her head as Waverly carefully inspects the wounds that have been left uncovered, hoping she won’t catch on to the turbulent emotions going through her mind.

 

She gets to the deep cut on her breast and pulls her finger through the jar of honey Gus had given her to put on it to help aid in healing.

 

She’d done this normally when Nicole was asleep, but she’s been much more awake and alert and so she pauses, realizing she might want to make sure Nicole knows what she’s doing.

 

“Nicole, I need to treat your…” She says and points to the area on her own body.

 

Nicole looks at her and the expression on her face has Waverly, wiping her finger off and giving her full attention to her.

 

“What’s wrong, Nic?” She asks, easing into the nickname quickly.

 

“I’m.. I’m a mess. So ugly. How could you even want someone like me…” She gets out, her voice strained as she tries not to cry.

 

Waverly immediately begins to smooth Nicole’s hair and caress her arm, her heart breaking. Seeing this strong, noble, confident woman so vulnerable makes her want to sweep her into her arms, but she knows she physically can’t. She knows she’ll have to convince her with her words.

 

“From the first moment I saw you, I thought you were the most handsome man I’d ever seen.” Waverly starts and holds up a finger near Nicole’s nose when she sees an argument brewing. “Then I thought you had the most beautiful soul of anyone I’d ever known.” She smiles now, placing her finger against Nicole’s nose and then sliding it slowly, gently down her cheek to her neck, her upper chest, avoiding bandages and wounds.

 

“Knowing you now as a woman; the bravest, most beautiful woman I could ever hope to be with on this earth, you are the farthest thing from ugly one could possibly imagine. The wounds will heal, the scars will fade, but seeing them will always, always remind me how hard you fought to protect me, to live, for us.” She says solemnly, cradling her belly.

 

“You _are_ beautiful, Nicole Haught, no matter how many scars you have.” She finishes reverently.

 

Nicole simply closes her eyes slowly, letting the remnants of tears leak out on their own accord. Waverly gently wipes them away and brings them to her lips.

 

“I can wait until you are asleep to treat you if you’d like.” Waverly says, sensing there might be an issue with the poor woman’s nonexistent modesty as well.

 

Nicole’s about to say yes, but then she shakes her head slowly. She doesn’t think Waverly is lying to her, but she decides she wants to watch as Waverly looks over her, wanting to be sure her body does not indeed put her completely off.

 

“Okay.” Waverly says, slightly breathy.

 

She goes to clean her hands once again as Gus showed her and comes back, eyes going to Nicole’s. “I need to pull the blanket down, is that okay?” She asks.

 

Nicole nods and Waverly turns her attention to her task. She peels the blanket down slowly and turns her mind clinical as she regards each wound, bruise, swollen area. She once again dips her finger in the medicinal honey and looks at Nicole so she can see what she’s doing. Nicole visibly relaxes and nods again and Waverly gently applies the honey from the top near her collarbone, all the way down to the swell of her breast, fingers gently brushing over a taught, pink nipple before ending near the middle of her stomach.

 

In a moment of boldness, she rests her hand gingerly on Nicole’s upper hip and leans down to press a kiss to her sternum, near, but not touching the long scratch. Nicole’s sharp intake of breath alarms her and she looks up at her, eyes wide, to see Nicole’s are closed and her mouth is slightly open. Encouraged, she moves her lips to her right shoulder and then again to her neck, under her jaw.

 

She can feel Nicole’s pulse on her lips and raises her head to look at her. Finally, Nicole opens her eyes and they are ablaze. Waverly moves ever so slowly until her lips are hovering right over Nicole’s. She holds absolutely still, letting Nicole be the one to remove the last sliver of space between them. She does and the kiss is so passionate and filled with longing, Waverly openly moans into it. She pulls away, eyes wide as Nicole’s head drops back, her mouth open and breathless.

 

“I don’t care how many scars you have, do you understand now?” Waverly whispers thickly. Nicole can only nod dumbly as a crack of a smile pulls at her stitched jaw.

 

 


	26. Tucker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tucker finally about to get his.

Nicole watches from her bed as Wynonna counts out the gold bars that she had her friend Mattie the blacksmith smelt down.

 

“You sure she didn’t say anything to anyone, right?” Nicole worries. Stories of men bragging about their strike and ending up robbed the next day were pretty common.

 

“For what I paid her, she’ll keep her mouth shut. That and a threat to close her down.” Wynonna winks.

 

She continues to pull bar after bar out of the heavy canvas sacks until they were all neatly stacked on the table.

 

“So that’s it.” Nicole says, shaking her head in wonder and disbelief.

 

“That I could get out of the mine by myself, yes.” Wynonna says as she begins separating her percentage out. When she is done putting them in reinforced crates, she pulls up the floorboard in the corner where Nicole had built a cache. She hands Nicole a slip of paper with the count and today’s gold price per ounce. Nicole reaches for her ledger and pencil and scratches down the calculations.

 

Her eyes go round as she hands the ledger back to Wynonna without a word.

 

When she looks at the numbers, she has to find the nearest seat to fall into. “Well.” She breathes out with a laugh.

 

“ _Well_ , indeed.” Nicole chuckles.

 

…

 

 

Waverly waits inside Gus’ shop looking out for Wynonna to come take her home when she sees Tucker heading down the boardwalk. She turns and walks deeper into the shop, behind the counter, hoping he won’t spot her and just keep walking. She has no such luck however when he comes straight to the door and enters the shop.

 

“Waverly, you work here?” Tucker asks as if he’s near scandalized. “Nicolas having trouble making ends meet with the mine? Happens to a lot of men out here. They come up here with dreams of becoming rich, only to go home broke and lost.” He shakes his head as his lips form a disingenuous, pitiful line.

 

Waverly’s first instinct is to defend Nicole’s reputation and tell him Nicolas has done well on their claim, but of course she doesn’t want that getting out at all. Especially to Tucker.

 

“I was just helping Gus out in return for her services.” Waverly replies neutrally. She scans the outside for any sign of Wynonna, sighing with relief when she sees her sled with Yukon and a newly purchased fine looking Malamute that Yukon had taken a liking to.

 

“Wynonna’s here. Have a good day, Mr. Gardner.” Waverly says abruptly rounding the counter and giving the man a wide berth. He turns and catches her arm however, giving a look that scares her mightily.

 

“You’ll starve out there on that claim with a baby coming and an invalid for a husband. I can take care of you Waverly. You and that baby will want for nothing.” He says, low and soft. She shakes out of his grip, which loosens quickly when they both hear the door to Gus’ office open.

 

“You alright, Mrs. Haught?” Gus asks, eyeing the tall man with steely eyes and a set jaw.

 

“Yes, I was just taking my leave.” She says without so much as a look back towards the man as she makes her way to the door.

 

“Is Gardner bothering you…” Wynonna starts, tying Yukon’s lead to the horse post and making her way into the apothecary, hand on her Buntline.

 

“Wynonna! Stop. Let’s just get home, please.” She says, shaken, but more out of anger than fear now.

 

Tucker stands in the apothecary, watching the two women mount the sled and head back towards the creek. He knows he has to act fast before winter really sets in. _Waverly belongs with me, not that sorry excuse of a man._

 

…

 

 

Wynonna watches Nicole and Waverly from her spot in front of the fire, smiling to herself when Nicole says something funny and Waverly throws her head back and laughs.

 

She’s beginning to feel more and more like a third wheel around them and is considering moving to the empty cabin. She’s about to go talk to them about it when she sees Waverly lean in, brushing some stray hair off of Nicole’s forehead. _I’ll talk to them later._ She thinks as she goes to the door and pulls on her boots and coat.

 

“Where are you going?” Waverly asks as she grabs one of the spare lanterns.

 

“Stretch my legs and go check on the boys.” She says with a nod.

“Be careful.” Nicole calls out and Wynonna gives her a small smile as she taps her gun holster.

 

She heads over to the insulated doghouse she and Nicole had built once Yukon started getting too big. She pokes her head in and sees him and Qila nestled in the thick wool blanket and wrapped around each other in a giant dog knot and gives their heads a pet. They respond with little whines and tail wags and she chuckles.

She stands and runs a gloved hand over the rough bark roof, remembering helping build it, shortly before the bear attack. She laughs to herself at how they’d argued and struggled to come together to just build a basic dog house that would attach to the outside of the main cabin. But by the end of it they had finished off the last of a pint of whiskey Wynonna had and ended up both crawling in to make sure it was big enough and having Waverly catch them with a delightedly amused smile.

 

How much she’d come to rue that day she’d gone through Nicole’s journal, spilling her secret to Waverly and generally making a huge mess of things. Even though things turned out well, _right is more like it, the way the two seemed all but destined to be together_ , she will always regret that action.

 

She heads over to the other cabin to see what needs to be done to it to get it back to livable and winterized. Seeing all she needs to do is tack up some wool coverings on the two small windows, add a couple of extra blankets to the bed and bring in some more firewood, she decides to bring all her stuff over that night. She’s tired of sleeping on the makeshift bed they made after Nicole took hers anyway.

 

She heads back to the other cabin and is already a trip in when either notice she’s moving her stuff to the other cabin.

 

When both look up at her surprised as she gathers her extra gun belt and hat, she knows she’s made the right choice.

 

“Goodnight, you two.” She chuckles as she leaves them to themselves.

 

“Did she just move out to the other cabin?” Waverly asks, looking around and seeing the bedroll gone and all of Wynonna’s stuff gone as well.

 

Nicole picks her head up and shrugs with her good shoulder. “Guess so.” She says and they continue on with their conversation about where they want to look for land in the West. She tells Waverly that with the amount of gold they’ve found, she can pick a house kit from Sears and Nicole can build it for her. She hopes that by this time next year, they’ll be well on their way to settling down as a family of three.

 

 

…

 

 

Wynonna is awakened by the dogs barking at her cabin door then she hears knocking and Waverly screaming at her to get up and bring her gun.  She's momentarily confused as to why the dogs are _inside_ her cabin, then she remembers stumbling out to get them, a little drunk, thinking they'd all keep each other warm since she knew she didn't have enough firewood for the entire night yet.

 

She stumbles out of bed, grabs her gun belt and yanks open the door as the dogs go running out.

 

“Tucker.” Waverly says breathlessly, eyes wide with fear.

 

Wynonna leaps off the cabin porch, jumping through the snow barefoot until she gets to the other cabin. The door is slightly ajar and she hears Tucker’s voice and can see him with his gun raised. “I’m going to shoot you dead and then drag your carcass through the middle of town so everyone can see what you really are. Then Waverly will be mine!”

 

….

 

 

Nicole wakes to something pressing against her neck. She opens her eyes, expecting to see Waverly, but whomever it is that’s back lit by the fire is not Waverly, or Wynonna.

 

“I just wanted to let you know that I’m taking your wife before I kill you.” She hears in a hoarse whisper. She realizes two things very fast: The voice belongs to Tucker Gardner and she’s got a knife at her throat.

 

She is paralyzed with fear as he laughs, a sick, low, menacing laugh. “You can’t even defend yourself. You pathetic dung heap. You don’t deserve such a beautiful woman.”

 

Nicole sees his arm pull back and she knows he’s about to slit her throat. She opens her mouth to scream, warn Waverly who must still be asleep three feet away. She feels the press of the knife and then suddenly Tucker is slumped over her, groaning in obvious pain and she looks up to see Waverly with the heavy cast iron skillet, eyes wide, chest heaving.

 

Nicole wastes no time using her good arm to grab the back of Tucker’s collar and pull him off of her. It takes every ounce of strength to even budge him until Waverly grabs him too and helps drag him off. He lands in a heap on the ground.

 

“Quick, go get Wynonna.” Nicole says, pushing herself up on her good arm until she’s upright. She sees the knife next to her still on the bed and picks it up.

 

Waverly shakes her head vehemently. “I’m not leaving you.” She says.

 

“Please, Sweetheart. Go fast before he wakes up.” Nicole urges as she slips off the bed gingerly. “Go.” She encourages again and Waverly finally goes, slipping into her house shoes but forgoing the coat.

 

Nicole looks around, trying to remember where she saw her revolver last. It’s dark though and hard to see. She tries to see if Tucker is armed, using her foot to shove him onto his back. She sees his small revolver sticking out of his shoulder holster and tries to bend down to grab it. She’s got her finger on the handle when he wakes and she tries to slide it out before he knows what’s going on.

 

“Goddamnit.” She hisses when he rolls out of her reach and stumbles up to his feet.

 

“That bitch.” He says to himself and rubs his head. He sees Nicole standing in front of him and draws his weapon. He looks at her squinting as she’s illuminated by the firelight in only long johns that do nothing to hide her unwrapped breasts.

 

“You… you’re a woman?!” He staggers back and then lets out a sharp gasp. “What in God’s Holy name…” He straightens and points the gun right at her heart. “I’m going to shoot you dead and then drag your carcass through the middle of town so everyone can see what you really are. Then Waverly will be mine!”

 

Wynonna's gun clears her holster as she pushes the door open as quickly and quietly as she can. She’s got to hit Tucker before he fires.

 

Suddenly she’s knocked out of the way by Yukon who has no such qualms about being quiet. He’s on Tucker before Wynonna can call him back. Tucker fires, but the bullet strikes harmlessly into the roof as Yukon crashes into him, tearing at his arm.

 

Qila joins in as well and they each take a side until Tucker is motionless on the ground and bleeding.

 

“Yukon, Qila, outside!” Nicole shouts and the dogs whine, but obey. The three women stand there in shock, looking at Tucker’s body seeing a gaping hole on the side of his neck, blood pumping out of his body with each beat of his heart.

 

“I’ll drag him out and take him to the station. Let him bleed out on the way, the piece of shit.” Wynonna sneers as she grabs his booted feet and drags him out.

 

“You’ll come back and clean our floor since you decided to have a sleepover with the dogs. They would have warned us had they been in their doghouse.  He would have never made it inside.” Waverly tells her sister angrily.

 

Wynonna hangs her head. “I know. I will.”

 

Waverly then turns to Nicole. She silently puts her arms around her, mindful of her left arm.

 

She pulls back and inspects her, frowning at the shallow cut on her neck. “Let’s get you cleaned up and back to bed.”

 

“In a minute.” Nicole says, enjoying the press of Waverly’s belly against her. She looks towards the door as the dogs excitedly jump around Wynonna who is dragging Tucker off the porch.

 

“Wynonna?” Waverly says, hating how shaky her voice sounds as she watches her sister too.

 

“Justified killing is what I’ll tell Nedley. Tucker came in and attacked you and the dogs were protecting you. Of all the goddamn nights to try this…” She mumbles as she pulls him across the snow to the sled, leaving a large crimson stain in her wake.

 

Nicole comes up behind Waverly and puts her hand on her shoulder. “Are you okay?” She asks tenderly, looking Waverly up and down when the pregnant woman turns and regards her.

 

“I am. God, Nicole, if I hadn’t woken up…” She shivers and Nicole pulls her in, nuzzling her hair and speaking into the brunette’s ear.

 

“You did and you saved my life.” Nicole says and then brings Waverly’s face up to meet hers. She leans down and places a soft, reassuring kiss to her lips and Waverly sighs into her as she lays her head against her upper chest. “Remind me never to make you mad. You have quite the swing.” She says with a crooked smile, capturing Waverly’s lips again before she can respond.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm guessing we are around the middle of our little story here. I've truly appreciated all the comments and kudos for my efforts. They really help me to get going on it when I have some time to sit and write, knowing you are enjoying the story. 
> 
> Feel free to share your favorite scenes/lines so far! :)


	27. I Think I Could Too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here, have a nice, soft chapter :)

Nicole spends the next week fretting about Tucker’s death and what would become of the investigation, but true to Wynonna’s word, Sheriff Nedley saw it as a justified killing as well. Tucker’s sisters began to put up a fuss, saying they would hire their own investigators until Nedley kindly reminded them that Tucker’s reputation and other seedy activities would be investigated in kind, so if they wanted to open themselves up to monetary retribution, that would be fine by him. That quieted them down quickly.

 

Yukon and Qila also were given an elk thigh bone each for their troubles and Wynonna promised to never bring the dogs in again. _Find yourself a lonely miner next time, won’t ya?_ Waverly had half-joked.

 

…

 

Nicole hears the dogs and goes to the cabin door to see Wynonna pulling up with a large wrapped package.

 

She struggles with pulling it off the sled as Nicole just leans on the doorframe watching. Wynonna senses her there and turns to look at her expectantly.

 

“You know I can’t do any lifting with my arm.” Nicole says, looking on curiously.

 

“Well, it’s for you, but I get it. No problem..” She grunts with exertion as she finally pulls it off the sled and up on the porch. Nicole gives her room as she drags it straight into the cabin.

 

“Wynonna, what in the…” Waverly asks as she watches her sister from her chair where she was taking a break from canning the remainder of the their fresh food for the winter.

 

Wynonna wrestles the package into the sitting area in front of the stove and pulls out her knife to cut the twine. It pops open and she pulls away the wrapping to reveal a giant bear rug.

 

“Is that?” Nicole asks, eyes wide in disbelief. Her heart jumps into her throat at the shock of seeing it again. Waverly pulls herself out of the chair and goes to her, rubbing her back gently as she looks at the ghastly beast that nearly killed her love.

 

“Turns out the thing died not too far from here so I had some of the sheriff deputies haul it back to Earl the taxidermist. This town truly has it all…” She wonders for a moment absently and then comes back to the present. “Anyway, I know you hate to waste resources and thought it’d be useful for the winter… and a nice Christmas present.” Wynonna says proudly, completely oblivious to the trauma it is obviously inducing in Nicole and Waverly as well.

 

She looks up to see Waverly standing next to Nicole closely, watching the redhead as her eyes continue to stare at the thing. She stands slowly, a now very contrite look on her face.

 

Finally, Nicole seems to snap out of it and looks at Wynonna with an unsteady smile. “It was thoughtful of you Wynonna. And it will be nice when winter sets in. Thank you.” Nicole says with a slow nod.

 

Wynonna’s face brightens then and she looks at Waverly whose look of disbelief dissolves into grudging acquiescence.

 

“Just please tell me you aren’t having Tucker stuffed as a birthday present.” Waverly deadpans, making Nicole bark out in laughter as Wynonna touches her chin as if contemplating the idea.

 

 

…

 

 

Wynonna and Nicole continue to work the mine, even though it is incredibly slow going with the permafrost set in. They work it every three days, the minimum on account of Wynonna’s deputy job demands and the fact Nicole’s arm isn’t fully healed yet.

 

She’s gotten pretty proficient in chopping wood one handed. She’s rarely unsupervised, however. Any time she’s out by the chopping stump, Waverly is on the porch watching.

They’ve settled into winter domesticity quite well but they know soon they’ll be cabin bound when the snowstorms come. Nicole keeps her worry to herself about Waverly likely giving birth right in the middle of one. If that happens, Gus will not be able to come and help.

 

Nicole buries the ax into the stump and collects the pieces into a large basket. She’s had to learn her limits, sometimes the hard way, on how much she can do without setting back her recovery.

 

She’s been pretty good though about knowing when she’s done too much and she’ll come in and rest unprompted. But she knows Waverly still smarts from their arguments they had after about three weeks of Nicole being bound to either the bed or the chair in front of the stove, feeling useless and sorry for herself.

 

_Nicole rolls out of bed and goes to pull her boots on and Waverly looks up from her book and asks what she’s doing._

_“Just getting out for a bit.” She says, irritation evident in her voice._

_“It’s icy outside. You could slip and fall.” Waverly says as she gets out of her chair and ambles her way over to Nicole, putting a hand on her shoulder as she smashes her heel into her boot._

_“I’ll be careful.” She answers gruffly, getting the other boot on and standing._

_“Nicole, if you fall…” Waverly reasons, rubbing her belly as she follows Nicole to the coat rack._

_“I’m not gonna fall, dammit! Quit babying me! I just need some air!” She finally yells struggling to get her coat on one handed. After it slips off a second time she just leaves it on the ground, storming out of the cabin angrily._

_She gets roughly ten steps out into the dark, freezing cold night and instantly regrets her decision. Her lungs begin to burn and her eyes instantly tear up and promptly freeze._

_She turns abruptly only to be met by Waverly, holding her coat for her. “Forget it, let’s go inside.” Nicole growls and brushes past her._

_She drops down in a chair and looks up when Waverly comes back in, silently hanging the coat back up and walking back over to her rocking chair. Nicole’s throat closes up when she sees the sad look in Waverly’s eyes._

_“I’m sorry. I just need to move. This laying around is making me crazy.” She says with a heavy sigh._

_Waverly remains silent as she picks her book back up._ Of course she’s going to make apologizing hard. _Nicole thinks. This isn’t the first outburst and it won’t be the last._

 

“Can you put some water on for some coffee?” Nicole asks when she reaches the porch with the bundle and sets it down near the door.

 

“Sure.” Waverly says with a smile. Nicole pulls off her gloves and slips her coat off gingerly, hanging it up along with her scarf and hat.

 

She watches Waverly fill the percolator and set it on the stove. She then comes behind her and wraps her hand around her, resting it on her belly.

 

They’ve slowly been getting more physical with each other and it is exciting and a bit scary for Nicole. Waverly has professed her love now and has made clear her intent on being with Nicole as man and wife to the world and they are slowly navigating what that will look like when they are alone.

 

It was Nicole who initiated the physical contact by asking if their beds could be moved together. Waverly had said yes and she had Wynonna come in and help. The first night Nicole had rolled onto her back and asked if Waverly wanted to come closer, she immediately slid into Nicole’s side, resting her head against her good shoulder as her belly pressed against Nicole’s side. A couple of times a night, Nicole would feel the baby kick, but she wouldn’t wake Waverly. It was kind of their little time together and it made Nicole’s heart swell with affection for the little one.

 

“How does your arm feel?” Waverly asks as she leans into the warm body. Nicole tilts her head down and kisses the side of Waverly’s head as she gives her a soft squeeze and then moves away to sit at the table.

 

“It’s achy, but not too bad. Thought I’d come in and rest.” She says and is rewarded with an approving smile as Waverly goes to the pantry and pulls out some biscuits from their breakfast this morning.

 

“Would you help me with taking a bath in a bit?” Waverly asks shyly.

 

Nicole looks up with a mouthful of biscuit and nods, swallowing so audibly it almost makes Waverly laugh.

 

“There’s no earthly way I can get myself in and out of the tub by myself and I’ve been dying to have a nice long soak.” Waverly says dreamily.

 

“I’ll go fill some buckets with snow and put them on to heat.” Nicole says, stuffing the rest of the biscuit in her mouth as she stands and goes to retrieve her coat, sliding it back on.

 

Nicole manages to get the tub halfway filled with hot, steamy water and stands idly near it as Waverly gathers some fresh clothes and sets them on the chair nearby. Nicole makes a move to give her some privacy but Waverly just gives her a warm, shy smile letting her know she can stay. She tries not to stare as Waverly removes her well-worn flannel dress, petticoat and underwear (the corset had gone to the wayside almost immediately after Chilkoot).

 

She raises her eyes slowly to meet Nicole’s whom is trying to guard her modesty by staring down at the water now.

 

“Nicole.” She says quietly as she moves forward and smiles hesitantly when Nicole’s eyes lift and take her in. She watches her features closely as her eyes slowly travel up her body until they meet her eyes.

 

Nicole gives her a smile that she places somewhere between wanton and shy. She can feel the frank appreciation and it makes her lower belly tingle and ache at the same time.

 

One side of Nicole’s lips pull up before she finally speaks. “Only fair I get to see you in your altogether.” She says first and her eyes sweep over Waverly again. She takes in her smooth, olive skin, her full breasts, her taught, swollen belly, her strong legs and delicately muscled arms. “You are more beautiful than I ever imagined.” She adds earnestly as she holds out a hand. “Let’s get you in the bath before you get cold.”

 

Waverly smiles and reaches out her hand, letting Nicole steady her and then move to the side so she can help ease her down into the tub. After she’s settled, Nicole grabs her a small cloth and the small cake of soap by the washstand. She then proceeds to remove her wool shirt, making quick work of the buttons with her practice one-handed technique until she is in her undershirt, sleeveless except for her casted left arm.

 

“May I wash your back?” Nicole asks.

 

Waverly wordlessly lathers the cloth with soap and hands it to Nicole as she leans forward as much as her belly allows and sweeps her hair to the side.

 

Nicole gets down on a knee and with her good hand begins to gently scrub her back, shoulders, down to her tailbone and then back up to each side, reaching until she barely touches the sides of her breasts.

 

It’s a caring, nurturing touch more than sensual and Waverly closes her eyes at the sweet, intimate contact. When Nicole finishes she stands and comes to the side of the tub again and Waverly leans back, eyes warm and shiny.

 

“Thank you.” She says just above a whisper. But Nicole doesn’t hand the cloth back. She instead moves to the end of the tub, setting the cloth on the edge and gently lifting one of Waverly’s feet and setting it on end of tub and then running the cloth over it and up to her knee. She’s got her eyes on her task, focused and thorough as Waverly watches her with an adoring smile. It’s a bit awkward for her one handed but Waverly moves and shifts in order to assist.

 

She almost asks Nicole to move further up with that cloth, but decides against it. She wants Nicole whole and healed completely for _that_.

 

Nicole sits back when her job is complete and hands the cloth back to Waverly. “Sit.” Waverly gently commands and Nicole pulls the chair closer so she’s facing Waverly.

Their eyes lock as Waverly finishes washing herself and by the time she’s finished both women are near panting, cheeks ruddy. They both know they aren’t in much shape for the type of intimacy they crave, so this will have to do for now. The want and desire is quite palpable and neither woman knows quite what to do with it though.

 

“Help me out?” Waverly asks and Nicole stands and throws the drying cloth over her casted arm as she helps Waverly out of the bath with the other. She awkwardly wraps the cloth around her shoulders as Waverly leans into her warm body from the front. Nicole puts her good arm around her, drying her best she can.

 

Waverly isn’t cooperating well though as she brings both hands to Nicole’s face, pulling her head down for a deep kiss. It is the most passionate one they’ve shared yet and Nicole begins to feel her breeches dampen as a result.

 

Waverly pulls back first, lips glistening in the muted fire light.

“I think I could spend the winter kissing you.” She confesses shyly, keenly aware her naked breasts are nearly pressed up against Nicole’s barely covered ones. She wonders if she steps back, will Nicole see the evidence of her arousal between her legs or will it be hidden by the dampness from the bath.

 

Nicole takes a deep breath, heart pounding. “I think I could too.” She smiles.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank you for all the positive comments! And to those who continue to nitpick my choices, you don't need to belabor your point over and over again when I don't agree with your nitpicking. I don't put this work up for you to criticize. I put it up for you to enjoy because I enjoy writing and sharing it. 
> 
> If you need clarification on something or you want to point out a continuity error or writing mistake, I'm all for it. But this isn't paid work and it isn't a thesis, so don't tell me I have to sit here and accept your (unwarranted) criticism simply because I allow comments.


	28. All I'll Ever Want or Need

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew... getting a little hot in herrree...
> 
> Enjoy!

It seems a fire is lit after Waverly’s bath that neither Nicole nor Waverly had any inclination of dousing. Waverly had never craved physical attention from Champ outside of an occasional kiss or hug, but with Nicole it felt like a building, incessant need.

 

When they would lay down at night, she would search for Nicole’s lips and when that wasn’t enough, she would let her hands roam over Nicole’s thin long johns, feeling an almost uncomfortable heat emanating from her body that told Waverly she certainly felt it as well.

 

Sometimes Nicole would reciprocate, as well as she could one armed, but more often than not, she would have to back out of Waverly’s arms, breathing hard and shaking her head as if to bring herself back to her senses.

 

“I think we should slow down, Waverly.” She’d always say, regret so evident in her voice, Waverly couldn’t be mad. She knew that Nicole was very nervous to touch her and scared to hurt the baby and truth be told, she hadn’t the first clue what two women would do together anyway. But she was certainly willing to explore.

 

She also wasn’t sure how much longer she could go without feeling Nicole’s touch and as uncomfortable as her body was most of the time as her baby grew inside her, the desire to have Nicole claim her in the most intimate of ways was becoming more of a need. She was done fretting over whether such acts were sins or against laws. She’d already given in to the fact she was deeply in love with Nicole and wanted to share everything with her: a home, a family, a future, everything a married couple would share.

 

On one particularly cold morning Waverly wakes up with her leg over Nicole’s and her hand tucked tightly around her between her ribcage and casted arm. She feels a pulsating heat between her legs and an overwhelming desire for Nicole to touch her there.

 

She begins to caress Nicole’s side as she props herself up slightly so she could kiss Nicole’s jaw. Her hand goes to Nicole’s breast as she reaches up more to capture her lips when she sees the redhead begin to stir.

 

Nicole’s head is swimming at first with the fuzziness of very recent wakefulness when she feels Waverly’s lips on hers, open and insistent. She feels Waverly’s hand on her breast and then fingers giving a gentle squeeze of her nipple. She feels Waverly’s leg hike up her thigh and the pregnant woman’s hips begin moving ever so slowly, undulating against her while her belly presses against her side.

 

“Waverly.” She whispers out, a plea, a question, a prayer.

 

Waverly doesn’t speak, only pulls her head back slightly, her eyebrows drawn together in a desperate request.

 

Even without any experience, Nicole knows what Waverly is asking of her. She can’t, nor does she want to, deny her. But she’ll need guidance, especially with the use of only one arm.

 

As if reading her mind, Waverly shifts her weight so she’s halfway straddling one of Nicole’s legs and bracing herself with her arms on either side of Nicole. She looks at Nicole with a rather shy smile that makes Nicole’s heart beat visible through her thin long johns. She locks her eyes with Waverly as she brings up her right hand, awkward with their position, to pull up Waverly’s nightgown. She’s slow about it and Waverly leans down to capture Nicole’s lips as she hovers above her, trying to leave enough space for Nicole’s hand to reach where she desperately needs it to. She looks up at Nicole, asking if she is okay and Nicole nods with a reassuring smile.

 

With some adjusting, Nicole draws her fingers tentatively through Waverly’s nether lips and they both gasp at the wetness, the sensation. A few more explorative strokes and Waverly’s forehead drops to Nicole’s breastbone. Nicole feels a vaguely familiar tickle in her lower belly as Waverly begins to sway back and forth on her fingers, desperately chasing the delicious friction she’d only ever felt with her own fingers.

 

Nicole picks up the pace a bit when Waverly’s breath comes in short rasps against her chest. The little whines and gasps Nicole is eliciting from Waverly is causing her own uphill climb towards ecstasy and for a second she loses focus only to have it brought back sharply when Waverly picks her head up and looks into Nicole’s eyes. It’s as if she’s reading every thought she’s ever had, feeling every emotion she’s ever felt.

 

“I love you so much.” Waverly gets out breathlessly before her hips shudder violently then still. Nicole marvels as her fingers become drenched with slickness as Waverly rocks forward and their lips crash together, tongues pressing hard into each other’s.

 

Nicole desperately wants to wrap her arms around her and hold her tight, but she can’t. She settles for slowly pulling her fingers away from Waverly’s center and bringing her hand around Waverly’s back, awkwardly caressing her as she lies on Nicole fully now, having collapsed from holding herself up, chest heaving.

 

Waverly tucks her head into the crook of Nicole’s neck and sighs, utterly spent and sated.

 

Nicole, who is still trying to wrap her head around what they’ve just done, cannot help the smile that is spreading across her face. Waverly finally looks up after a moment and stares at her profile.

 

She knows this wasn’t planned or ideal for their first time, but to her it didn’t make it any less profound or perfect in her eyes.

 

She’d felt more in those few moments of Nicole touching her than she’d felt in two years with Champ.

 

“Are you okay?” Waverly asks as she gently pulls Nicole’s face to hers, looking at her left arm.

 

“More than. I wasn’t expecting… this… before you had the baby.” She admits quietly.

 

Waverly looks down for a moment and then back up, her face taking on a serious expression. “I’ve been thinking about it since you’ve started feeling better and after the bath… well, I just knew I wanted you to… I needed you to…" she says, but stops, a bit flustered at not being able to convey her thoughts properly.

 

Nicole reaches up and puts her hand to the back of Waverly’s neck, caressing gently, her fingers still damp. Her eyes are impossibly soft as her lips crease into a serene, loving smile.

“I understand. I’ve wanted to touch you like that for.. a very long time.” She admits with a shy smile. She turns towards her as much as she can and pulls her head in to kiss Waverly. It’s sweet and gentle and both women come away from it feeling as close as they ever have.

 

“I just want to make you happy, Waverly, for the rest of my days. Whatever you want, or need, if I can give it to you I will, no matter what.” Nicole says earnestly.

 

Waverly feels a tear beginning to form in the corner of her eye and she can’t believe fate or divine intervention brought this woman into her life. “Sweetheart, _you_ are all I’ll ever want or need.” She says as she brings her mouth back to Nicole’s and lets her fingers travel down to the little flap that opens at the front of Nicole’s long johns.

 

Nicole had already been seconds away from coming undone and when Waverly’s fingers find Nicole’s nether lips, it takes only a few small, gentle circles for her to gasp into Waverly’s lips as a mild orgasm rolls over her. Waverly’s fingers continue to move in gentle circles and Nicole has to ask her to withdraw them in a shaky breath. “Too much.” She whispers out in a breathless chuckle and Waverly shyly ducks her head at her over-eagerness.

 

“I’ll… last longer next time.. I hope.” Nicole says, a bit embarrassed.

 

“Well, we’ll have a lot of ‘next times’ to make sure.” Waverly responds with a crooked smile.

 

 

 

 

…

 

 

By the time December rolls around, work stops on the mine altogether. It’s just too dangerous. Every morning Nicole wakes up, stokes the fire, puts on coffee and shovels her way out of the cabin, making a path to Wynonna’s and to the outhouse.

 

She’d made Wynonna cut the cast off after two months of having it on (Gus had said it was the bare minimum to keep it on) and was very discouraged how much her arm had atrophied. She was determined to get the most use out of it however and went about doing everything she could with it, including being more mobile when she and Waverly were intimate. It didn’t happen too often with Waverly way advanced in pregnancy now, but they’d established a nice, careful way of meeting each other’s needs when desire would overcome one or the other.

 

Waverly of course watched her like a hawk and her logical anecdotes and careful reminders were met with long looks and exasperated sighs, but Nicole knew she was right. So she struck a balance: pushed enough for it to be sore but not painful. She worked on range of motion in the morning and would lift nothing more than fifteen pounds as per Gus’ instructions to Waverly, which of course Waverly made her follow.

 

Also, Waverly had borrowed some of Gus’ medical texts and had read about the benefits of cold compresses and every evening, she would step outside and gather some snow up in a piece of oil cloth and wrap it around Nicole’s upper arm.

 

It was on one of those such occasions when she was reaching down to gather snow that Waverly felt an incredible sharp and painful tightening of her belly. It took her to one knee and Nicole was up out of her chair before Waverly could feel the cold seep into her long skirt.

 

“What’s happening?” She asks, voice full of fear.

 

“I think… I think the baby is coming soon.” Waverly says as she leans heavily on Nicole’s leg, unable to straighten just then. She breathes deep until it passes and then allows Nicole to help her up.

 

“Okay… Okay…” Nicole says, more to herself than to Waverly as she guides her to the bed. She helps her lie down and pushes some hair from her face. Her hairline is already beginning to dampen with sweat.

 

“I’m going to go get Wynonna, okay?” She says and only begins to get up when Waverly nods.

 

She trudges through the snow and clomps up the porch, pulling the cabin door open. “Wynonna, get up. Baby’s coming.” She says, not even waiting to hear her response and rushes back to Waverly’s side. Wynonna pushes off the blankets she was under and scrubs her face. She pulls on her boots, coat and gloves and heads out, pushing her cabin door shut.

 

“Weather’s pretty clear, I’ll go get Gus.” Wynonna says as she peeks into the cabin a couple of minutes later. She leashes up the dogs to the sled and mushes them into a run.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Below statement is a political message. Read if you want, skip if you don't!
> 
> Okay, to all my fellow American readers: These are definitive times. I've been up this morning watching the news and I'm ready to march this afternoon if Rosenstein is fired. After that, I'm volunteering to canvass for the Democrat candidate running against the incumbent Republican congresswoman in my district in a deep red part of CA (they exist!)
> 
> I urge you to take action if you love this country and do not like the way it is heading. Vote, get your friends and family to register and vote, volunteer, have conversations. It's the only way to ensure we continue to have equal rights, preserve women's body autonomy, have the right to unionize and one day comprehensive, affordable health insurance.
> 
> Okay, end political rant...


	29. Serendipitous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can't thank you guys enough for continuing to comment. Warms my heart you are enjoying the story and even more for the positive comments about the importance of voting. We are the only ones who can undo this clusterfuck!
> 
> Now have a short but incredibly sweet chapter with a completely gratuitous writer's license at the end! lol

By the time Wynonna and Gus pull up to the cabin, Waverly is sweating profusely, down to just her nightgown. She’s curled in a fetal position with Nicole sitting in front of her next to her belly, running her hand over her back.

 

Gus immediately orders Wynonna to start water boiling and stoke the fire as she takes out her own supply of clean cloths an metal instruments the make Nicole shudder. Gus looks at her with sympathetic smile. “I don’t intend on using any of these. They are only for emergencies.” She says and Nicole wants to ask her what that means.

 

“Let me have a look, Waverly.” Gus says gently and waits for Waverly to slowly roll to her back. Gus reaches in under her nightgown and nods abruptly.

 

“Okay. Little one’s comin’. Nicole gonna need your help.” She says and looks up to Nicole whose face is etched with worry.

 

“All the husbands help in this method. First Nation women have been using it for thousands of years. I find it is best for baby and mother.” Gus says as she instructs Nicole to strip down to her underwear. “Come on, don’t be shy. Your wife’s about to bare you a child. Least you can do is forgo some modesty.” Gus says matter-of-fact. Nicole’s too worried for Waverly to argue any of Gus’ points however, so she does as told.

 

“Now help Waverly out of hers. Skin on skin is best.” She instructs as she shoos Wynonna out of the cabin.

 

“I’ll call you if I need you.” She dismisses. Wynonna doesn’t look the least bit put out as she puts her coat back on and heads outside to put up the dogs and sled.

 

Nicole kneels by the bed with a now naked Waverly and she only in her long underwear bottoms. She strokes her forehead as she grimaces.

 

Gus comes over to her and squats over by her head talking calmly. “I’m going to have you up on your knees on the bed as you hold on to Nicole for support. Let’s let gravity help this baby come out, okay?” She says with a warm smile and Waverly nods.

 

Gus stands and positions Nicole so her thighs are tight against the bed and helps Waverly to her knees. She scurries to the other side of the bed and lays down an oil cloth blanket and instructs Waverly to kneel on that. “Don’t want to ruin your mattress.” She chuckles absently.

 

“Now Waverly, hang on to Nicole and spread your knees apart.” She says and Nicole looks down at her lovingly as Waverly reaches her arms over her shoulders, sagging a bit as another contraction hits. As it grows in severity, Waverly whimpers and tightens her hold on Nicole’s shoulders as her head presses into her sternum. Nicole wraps her arms around her back loosely, trying to support her best she can. Her shoulder is screaming but she ignores it. She knows it pales in comparison to what Waverly’s going through.

 

She sees Gus behind Waverly looking between her legs. She leans back on her knees and smiles up at Nicole. “Not much longer now, Waverly. Looks like this little one is gonna bless you with a short labor.” She says as she sits back a little more, not wanting to intrude on the private moment. At this point she’s just there in case anything goes wrong.

 

 

Waverly lets out a low moan as she relaxes for a moment, turning her head to lay her cheek on Nicole’s shoulder. They are slick with sweat from the heat of the cabin and the exertion of labor and from Nicole holding her upright. Since her first contraction, she’s been in labor a little over three hours. Blissfully short for how far along she is, Gus helpfully supplied, but to Waverly it was little consolation. She feels like her body’s being ripped in two.

 

She breathes hard into Nicole’s neck, who has been strong and quiet, murmuring encouragement and pressing her lips to her head and face between contractions.

 

Waverly suddenly remembers Nicole’s shoulder and picks up her head in concern. She doesn’t miss the slight wince on her face and presses a kiss to the redhead’s jaw.

 

“You doing okay?” She asks and is surprised at the laugh she receives from Nicole.

 

“Am _I_ doing okay?” She looks down in adoring amusement.

 

Waverly’s eyes note true concern and Nicole smiles, love and pride showing in her eyes. “I’m fine. Just worried about you. I hate seeing you in pain.” She answers truthfully.

 

Waverly closes her eyes and nods slowly. She then opens them and cracks a tired smile. “Well, at least I’m only doing this once.” She responds wryly.

 

A quick look of regret flashes over Nicole’s features before she can stop it and Waverly’s eyes grow a bit more misty than they already are. “Hey.” She says sweetly and brings her hand from over her shoulder to her jaw, tilting her head down for a deep kiss. “You are going to be the best dad to our little one.” She says after she pulls away, her eyes warm and sincere.

 

Nicole nods and presses a kiss to her forehead, tightening her hold across Waverly’s taught, sweaty back just a bit. She feels the muscles begin to tighten again and she can tell this is going to be a big one.

 

Waverly nearly pulls her down as her arms fold over themselves behind her neck and a keening cry rips from her mouth. She begins to shake and Gus scrambles back up on the bed from the chair she was sitting in and instructs Waverly to start pushing now.

 

Waverly presses her forehead into Nicole’s collarbone hard and grunts mightily. Nicole bends slightly to get a better hold across her back to help her brace and after two more strong pushes she hears a muted squelch and the sound of spilling fluid and then a dull slap of flesh against flesh.

 

Both women hold their breath as they crane their necks to get a look.

 

“Give him a minute.” Gus says distractedly as Waverly turns her body to look.

 

Then, finally, the cabin is filled with the sound of strong new lungs. Waverly lets out a delighted, weary cry as Gus quickly wraps him in a blanket and sets him safely aside.

 

“You’re not done, honey. Gotta get the placenta out. Another quick push.” Gus tells her, but she barely pays attention, so intent she is on getting a look at their baby. Nicole too is distracted looking over Waverly.

 

“Girl, give me a push and you can hold him!” She says with mild impatience. Waverly turns and gives Nicole a brilliant, exhausted smile and then bares down one more time. They both hear the unpleasant sound of the placenta coming out and Waverly practically lays on Nicole while Gus makes quick work of getting everything cleaned up before telling Nicole she can help Waverly lie down.

 

She gently guides her to the pillows on the top of the bed and immediately the baby is placed on Waverly’s chest. Gus gives Nicole scissors and she points to cut the cord. Nicole looks at her with a horrified expression. “You want your boy dragging around his mother’s placenta the rest of his life? Cut the cord!” She says with a laugh. Nicole gingerly leans down to cut it and Gus dresses the end while Nicole kneels at the side of the bed, placing one hand on the baby and the other atop Waverly’s sweaty head.

 

“So, a boy.” Nicole coos as she traces his cheek with a fingertip. Her eyes are filled with tears now as she stares at him. She then looks at Waverly and leans down to give her a gentle kiss. “You did it. So proud of you.” She says quietly.

 

“I love you.” Waverly breathes out as she takes a hand from the baby and places it on Nicole’s cheek. Nicole turns her face and kisses her palm then turns back to the baby boy.

 

“Welcome to the world Nicolas Jack Haught.” Waverly coos.

 

Suddenly the cabin door smacks open and Wynonna comes in, eyes wide with a stupidly happy smile on her face.

 

“Shut the damn door!” Gus bellows as she gathers the soiled cloths and blankets and dumps them in the tub.

 

Wynonna closes the door, shucks off her coat and boots and grabs a lantern so she can get a look at the baby.

 

She comes to the opposite side of Nicole and sets the lantern down and leans over the bed. Waverly pulls the blanket down off his head and they all gasp when they get a look at his small tuft of bright red hair.

 

“What the?” Wynonna shouts, startling the baby a bit.

 

“How in the?” Nicole breathes out in shock.

 

Gus walks over, looks at the commotion and claps her hands once and chuckles as she goes back to what she was doing.

 

Waverly just throws her head back and laughs. She knows there’s an easy explanation for it; she remembers her aunt Patricia was a redhead and Champ’s grandmother was named Ginger for that very reason.

 

But for it to come out on her and Nicole’s child, well, that was truly serendipitous.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	30. Goddamn Right It Won't

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, been screaming at my television the last two days... lol but not really l

After Waverly is cleaned up and both she and Nicole are dressed in some clean, comfortable clothes, Wynonna pitches in helping get things cleaned up (with much complaining and gagging) as Gus prepares a warm bath for the baby, helping Nicole clean all the afterbirth off of him.

 

Although Waverly is utterly exhausted, she sits up in bed, smile so big it threatens to split her face. She watches as Gus shows Nicole how to hold his head, instructing her about keeping his umbilical cord dry and how gentle she needs to be with his skin.

 

Her eyes glisten as Gus slips back so Nicole can take over. She’s so careful with him, cupping water with one hand and rinsing his shoulders, head, under his little arms and legs. Her face is scrunched in concentration and Waverly is hard-pressed to recall a sweeter scene in her whole life than watching Nicole with their little boy. Towards the end of his bath he begins to fuss and then outright cry and Nicole looks to Gus alarmed.

 

“He’s probably hungry, so go ahead and take him out, wrap him up and give him to his mother.” Gus says over her shoulder as she hangs the now clean blankets and cloths on a line in the corner of the cabin to dry.

 

“Okay, little man, here we go.” Nicole coos as she gently lifts his squirming body out of the water and wrapping a drying cloth around him while holding him carefully to her chest. She moves to the soft blanket laid out for him at the end of the bed and she wraps him tight like Gus had told her to and presses a kiss to his forehead before picking him up again and settling him across Waverly’s chest.

 

“See if he’ll latch on his own.” Gus says, finally coming over, hands on her hips as she watches.

 

Waverly brings the baby to her breast and presses above her nipple to bring it up towards his mouth. He opens his mouth and roots around until his tiny lips find purchase. Waverly gasps when he starts suckling and Nicole looks on in amazement.

 

“Is he getting any? Sometimes it takes a bit for it to drop.” Gus asks, leaning over to see.

 

Nicolas seems to be happily eating though as he lets out soft little sighs and grunts as he suckles away. Waverly pulls her nipple out just enough to peek, seeing the colostrum bubble up around his mouth.

 

“Excellent. Remember to switch breasts each feeding.” Gus reminds and both Waverly and Nicole nod absently, eyes glued to the little boy, making Gus chuckle.

 

 

 

 

Before Wynonna takes Gus back, Nicole prepares them all a meal of some dried fruit and leftover elk stew. They are all famished and Waverly is mighty grateful that Gus didn’t subscribe to the Western practice of not letting new mothers eat right away.

 

“That is absolute hogwash.” She tells Waverly when she brings her a bowl of stew.

 

The four women eat in relative silence, as they are all either physically or emotionally spent. The second Nicole is finished with her meal she goes to the little basinet and peeps in on her sleeping son.

 

“She’s gonna be a fine father.” Gus says with a crooked smile as she gathers her belongings she’d brought with her. She’d written out a few things for the new parents to pay attention to and with a soft kiss to everyone’s foreheads, including Wynonna’s, she loads herself onto the sled, patiently waiting for Wynonna to hook up the dogs.

 

“Watch over them, Wynonna. Winter’s going to be tough on them with a new baby.” Gus says as she looks at Wynonna pointedly.

 

“I will, Gus. I will.”

 

 

…

 

 

 

“Merry Christmas, son.” Nicole whispers quietly as she takes Nicolas out of his basinet. His eyes are open and he’s gnawing on his fist meaning he’s hungry. She also scrunches her nose when she smells he needs a change.

 

She puts him on the changing table and makes quick work of getting him cleaned up for his mama and with perfect timing, presents him to Waverly right as he takes in a deep breath to cry.

 

“Okay, okay, Nicky.” Waverly laughs sleepily as she pulls open her nightgown.

 

He’s grown quite a bit in the two weeks he’s been out of the womb and Waverly’s sore nipples can certainly attest to it. Nicole sits at her hip watching the boy suck voraciously, smiling in sympathy when Waverly winces a bit.

 

“It’s Christmas morning, right?” Waverly asks through a yawn as she reaches out to Nicole to take her hand.

 

“It is.” She smiles widely. “And don’t be mad, because I know you said no gifts, but I already had this one bought and…” Nicole says as she leans over to the nightstand and pulls a small, wrapped package from atop it.

 

Waverly eyes the package. “That wasn’t there when I was nursing him a couple of hours ago.” She says suspiciously.

 

“I pulled it out of my coat pocket when I got up to change him.” She says pulling her hand out of Waverly’s and replacing it with the package.

 

Waverly gives Nicole an adorable scowl but pulls apart the loose wrapping one handed. She leans down and looks to see what it is in the low light. Nicole takes it out and holds it up.

 

“It’s a locket necklace.” She says and pulls it open to reveal a small inscription and a place for a small photograph.

 

Waverly pulls the locket part closer so she can read it. “ _Where you go, I go_.” She says aloud.

 

“It’s got room for a picture of us. Once we get to the lower 48, or even here when winter’s over.” Nicole explains as she works on the clasp.

 

She pauses though when she sees Waverly’s face. She’s fighting tears and Nicole thinks she’s done something wrong.

 

“If you don’t like it, I can…” Nicole says quickly but Waverly shakes her head vehemently.

 

“No, I love it. I just… I came so close to throwing it all away.. You and me.” She sniffles.

 

“But you didn’t. And now you are stuck with me.” Nicole says and grins wide, eyes going big and soft.

 

Waverly lets the locket drop back down between Nicole’s fingers and pulls Nicole in for a deep kiss. When they break apart, Waverly slides her hand from the back of Nicole’s neck to her jaw, running her thumb over her dimple.

 

“This dimple makes me absolute mush in your hands, Mr. Haught. Do you know that?” She says, her expression open and adoring.

 

“Well, I do now. Might be sorry you told me.” Nicole quips as she covers Waverly’s hand with her own, the necklace still entwined in her fingers.

 

“Never. Now burp your son and then put him back down to bed. I need to kiss you for a few minutes.” Waverly orders sweetly.

 

“Yes, Mrs. Haught.” She dutifully replies as she gently pulls him away and places him on her shoulder. “And just so you know, you’ve given me the greatest Christmas present I’ll ever receive.” She says, looking down at the little one and then kissing his shock of red hair.

 

 

…

 

 

 

Days turn into weeks as Waverly and Nicole navigate parenthood while winter in the Yukon rages. They fall into a pretty consistent routine of feedings, changes, cleaning and sleeping whenever they can, but it is hard going at the beginning. Nicole has little experience with babies and children in general and Waverly has only a bit more, so they are learning as they go.

 

Nicole feels so bad for Waverly those first few weeks as little Nicolas is quite the eater. Every two hours he begins to cry wanting to be fed. Sometimes Waverly will wake up instinctively and go to the rocking chair, letting Nicole sleep but increasingly, it’s Nicole who is woken up by the crying baby and she literally has to roll Waverly over and place Nicolas carefully on her chest before she rouses and pulls herself up onto the headboard and holds him half asleep while he nurses.

 

There are times when he’s freshly diapered, fed and burped but still he wails. Nicole’s taken to wrapping him up and stepping outside just so the cold air shocks him into quiet. It is truly the last resort though and only done if he continues to cry for hours. There was only one time that it didn’t work and Waverly insists Nicole go fetch Gus. She’s glad she did as the poor little guy had had a mild ear infection. Nicole cried as she held the warm compresses to his ear, overwhelmed with guilt until Gus got it through to her that the sudden trips outside did not cause it.

 

 _“Babies get ear infections sometimes, Nicole. He’ll be just fine.”_ Gus said supportively. It took days for Waverly to convince her that Gus was right.

 

But it isn’t all a challenge. In the early evenings when he’s most alert they’ll lie down with him on the bearskin rug and Waverly will sing to him. It is quickly becoming Nicole’s absolute favorite memory that she’ll take with her from this time up in the Yukon and she makes sure to take in every detail of this time as they lie cuddled together without a care in the world.

 

_Waverly finishes the lullaby on a quiet note when she sees Nicky has fallen asleep and looks up at Nicole who has the biggest grin on her face._

 

_“What?” She asks quietly with a small shy smile._

_“You, him, this. I’m just really, really happy is all.” Nicole replies honestly. Waverly reaches over and pulls her gently, mindful of the sleeping baby between them and brings their lips together softly._

_“Me too.” Waverly says, eyes light as she pulls away_.

 

 

…

 

 

Around mid-winter, Nicole decides to take over the task of preparing all their meals, mainly to let Waverly sleep more, and neither Waverly nor Wynonna object.

 

But as winter drags on and Nicole continues to monitor their food supply, she worries about it lasting the rest of winter, which seems to have no inclination of letting up any time soon.

 

They all knew fresh food would be extremely limited, but even their canned and dried stores are depleting rapidly. They’d all thought that what they’d purchased, caught or gathered would be enough until supply ships could start running again, but winter was not cooperating.

 

Without letting on to Waverly or Wynonna, Nicole has been taking in less and less food during meals as her concern grows. She reasons that Waverly needs it more because she’s nursing and Wynonna is still working long hours as a deputy. She can’t work the mine yet and really her only tasks are helping with the baby, cooking and shoveling snow when it gets too deep.

 

She thinks about the lean days during their journey here when they were on their last cans of food. She knows it won’t be forever, so she focuses on that especially when she feels her energy draining a whole lot quicker than normal as the long, cold dark winter days stretch on.

 

When the weather is clear on occasion, she’d go out and set traps, but unsurprisingly when she goes to check them, they are empty. The shops in town had run out of food long ago and as she sits down and recalculates, she just hopes that winter will abruptly let go and perhaps the river would thaw sooner rather than later for supply shipments to start again.

 

Until then though, she secretly continues to cut her portions even when Waverly suggests Nicole eat more. The new mother notices her getting thinner but figures it is loss of muscle tone because she is less physically active while they rode out the winter inside the cabin.

 

Nicole noticed too another side effect to starving oneself is that along with depleted energy, she was beginning to get increasingly edgy. She’d catch herself being short with Waverly and when little Nicolas would cry, her jaw would set hard in irritation. She was never ever not gentle with him, but if Waverly or she didn’t get to him quickly, she would find herself wishing she was anywhere but cooped up in a cabin with a newborn.

 

 

“I’m going out.” Nicole gets out once she deposits Nicolas in Waverly’s arms, irrationally angry. Waverly had just put down her mending and was about to get up and get him when Nicole had dropped the kindling she’d just brought in and stalked to the basinet.

 

“Are you okay, Nic?” Waverly asks worriedly as she watches her pull on her boots roughly. She feels like she’s been walking on eggshells for a couple of weeks now and wonders if Nicole was having second thoughts about being with her and raising Nicolas.

 

“I’m fine!” She snaps as she pulls her coat on and stomps out.

 

Waverly stares at the door for a good few seconds before opening her top for Nicky to nurse. She gets him settled and begins to cry quietly, feeling increasingly distraught and not knowing quite what to do. Her head snaps up when she hears the door open and sighs when it’s just Wynonna.

 

“Sometimes I really hate this job.” She mumbles with a frown as she shrugs off her coat and begins to pull her boots off.

 

“Did you see Nicole out there?” Waverly asks.

 

“Saw her stalking off upcreek.” Wynonna answers with a heavy sigh. She just wants to pour herself a bit of whiskey and forget her day.

 

“I can’t get her to talk to me.” She says, worry evident in her voice. “She seems upset and I don’t know…”

 

“She’s used to doin’ stuff. Probably goin’ stir crazy cooped up in your little cabin. No offense.” Wynonna adds with a small apologetic smile.

 

“You don’t think she looks…” Waverly is trying to find the right word. Wynonna just looks at her quizzically and Waverly sighs. “When we lie down to sleep, I can feel how thin she’s gotten.” Waverly tries to think of the last time she’s seen Nicole without clothes on, but can’t really remember. Of course sleep deprivation has her barely remembering own name, but…

 

“I don’t know Waverly, we’re kinda having to cut back on rations. Maybe it’s affecting her more?” Wynonna ventures as she absently picks up Nicole’s ledger that’s sitting on the table in front of her. “All this gold under our feet and can’t even buy more food because there’s none to be bought, huh…” She murmurs as she flips through the pages. She turns to the last one and her eyes focus and she falls silent.

 

“What is it?” Waverly asks as Wynonna looks at the page and then gets up and opens the pantry, a confused look crossing her face. She moves some things around and grabs the ledger again, this time looking a bit upset.

 

“Wynonna?” Waverly asks, a bit more insistent.

“Sit tight. I’ll be right back.” Wynonna says with muted anger leaving Waverly puzzled and worried.

 

 

 

“What were you gonna do, starve to death in front of your family?” Wynonna calls to Nicole as soon as she’s within earshot.

 

Nicole had been out checking one of her traps and turns around a bit too abruptly at Wynonna’s voice and falls down in the snow.

 

Wynonna waves the ledger as she approaches, pulling at Nicole’s elbow to help her up when she’s close enough. She’s shocked at how light she is.

 

“Nicole..” She says slowly and Nicole just pulls her elbow out of Wynonna’s hand. Even that abrupt motion hurts.

 

“I read through this. I looked at the pantry. I know you’ve been barely eating. Did you have a plan when you are too weak to take care of your wife, your son?” She challenges though her voice is soft with concern.

 

“We have to make the food last, Wynonna. Waverly, you.. you need more.” She says simply.

 

“Why didn’t you talk to me? Waverly?” Wynonna shakes her head. “Stubborn, mule-headed…” She mumbles.

 

“What could any of you do? I’ve been laying traps…” She says, gesturing to the trap a few feet from them.

 

“I can eat in town. Sheriff has some food stocked away for this very reason.” She sighs and looks up to the sky when Nicole looks unmoved.

 

“You know what I did today?” She asks, plowing on to answer the rhetorical question. “I had to literally chip Sampson out of his bed when one of the mining foreman asks me to check up on him. Starved to death and froze right to his bed.” Wynonna says, her voice elevated to try and get through to the redhead. “He was younger than us, too proud to come down and ask for help.”

 

“That won’t happen to me.” Nicole says adamantly. Wynonna stares at her, noting her sunken cheeks, the dark circles under her eyes she can clearly see as the full moon reflects off the snow.

 

“You’re goddamn right it won’t.” She says and goes to grab Nicole’s elbow again. This time Nicole doesn’t pull away as Wynonna half drags, half pulls Nicole back to the cabin.


	31. Seeing Stars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, the time of daily updates has come to a close, friends... Don't despair, I still plan on updating a MINIMUM of once a week. I abhor schedules so I can't give you a day, just be surprised when you check in on AO3.
> 
> You'll like this one I think. I can't even call it smut. Too harsh a word... but there is some lovemakin' at the end. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Wynonna ushers Nicole in wordlessly and she begins to take off her coat before even lifting her eyes to find Waverly’s. She couldn’t. She was too ashamed at her behavior.

 

She sits down on the bench, not even able to stand upright to pull off her boots. She side eyes Wynonna as she makes her way to the pantry and moving things around before looking back down at her boots.

 

Nicole hears the creak of the rocking chair as Waverly gets up and she listens to her walk to the basinet. She lifts her head then to watch her lay Nicky down gently and continues to watch her as she straightens. Nicole can see the tension in her wife’s shoulders from where she still sits on the bench.

 

She’s drawn out of her thoughts when Wynonna shoves a lantern in her face. “Open your mouth.” She instructs and Nicole just squints at her. “Open your damn mouth, Haught.” She commands this time. She sees Waverly coming towards them and does what she’s told.

 

“Yep, just as I thought. Your elbows hurt? Knees?” Wynonna asks as she twists the cap off the jar she’d gotten from the pantry.

 

“What’s wrong?” Waverly asks, her hurt pushed aside momentarily by concern.

 

“Well, your _husband_ here thought it’d be a good idea to half starve herself and in the process, she starting to develop symptoms of scurvy.” Wynonna says with enough reprimand in her voice to make Nicole’s eyes shoot to the ground in shame.

 

“What?” Waverly says and goes to the redhead, putting her hand under her chin and forcing her face up. Looking at her close now under the bright lantern light, she barely holds in a gasp as her eyes grow wide and watery.

 

“I didn’t think it’d be a _good_ idea. I did what I had to do.” She says, eyes darting to Wynonna after a wave of mild defiance washes over her.

 

“What do you mean?” Waverly asks, looking into Nicole’s eyes.

 

“We don’t have enough food to last through the rest of winter.” She says as if it explains everything.

 

“So, you haven’t been eating.” Waverly fills in. Her eyes go from concern to irritation. “Why didn’t you say something? Tell me and Wynonna?” She asks with a bit of edge. She can’t believe Nicole would do this, keeping this a secret and risking her life. She felt some shame too at not realizing this sooner.

 

“I honestly thought there was nothing you could do! There’s no supplies in town, I can’t trap anything…” She begins to state her case but Waverly’s face remains unchanged despite her feelings of guilt.

 

“I told her I could eat some meals at the Sheriff’s. Hell, we could even try our hand at ice fishing. Some of the men have been kind of successful.” Wynonna helpfully responds.

 

“Now drink this or you’ll be losing teeth soon.” Wynonna says, shoving the small amount of lime juice they have for just this occasion. Gus had insisted every bunkhouse and cabin had some.

 

She drank it and winced at the tartness but knew better than to complain.

 

“Now, let’s set some water to boil. Gonna get you some instant potatoes and your gonna eat them all on your own, got it?” Wynonna says, pinning Nicole with a hard stare.

 

Nicole nods and her eyes track Waverly moving to put some water on to boil.

 

“I’m gonna see Lonnie in the morning about his ice fishing rig and see if we can’t set up our own.” Wynonna announces before pulling her coat on and heading back to her cabin to give the couple a bit of privacy. She suspects Waverly will want it so she can give Nicole a proper dressing down.

 

 

Nicole finishes the last bite of potatoes and puts her fork down. Her stomach feels uncomfortable after filling it after so long and she takes some deep breaths making sure everything will stay down.

 

Waverly’s yet to say anything else to her besides a _‘here you go’_ when she sat the bowl of potatoes in front of her. Even though Waverly had gone to sit back in her chair and had picked up her book ostensibly to read it, Nicole could feel her eyes on her every few minutes.

 

She gets up from the table slowly and washes her bowl and fork, setting them on the drying rack before ambling over to where Waverly was and easing her way down to the floor at her feet. Waverly doesn’t look at her, but she does set her book down. Nicole sighs deeply and scoots closer, laying her head in Waverly’s lap.

 

Seconds tick by as Nicole thinks about the words to say to apologize when she feels Waverly’s fingers threading slowly through her hair.

 

“I’m sorry I took this on myself. I thought I was doing right, but obviously I wasn’t. I just didn’t want you to worry is all.” Nicole says, closing her eyes at the warm caress of fingers.

 

“You can’t do that, Nic. You just can’t. ” Waverly says, her voice shaky, spent. Nicole looks up when she hears her sniffle and sees her eyes shining.

 

“Hey, I’m sorry…” She says, reaching up to cup Waverly’s cheek.

 

“And I didn’t even notice it was that bad…” Waverly says, shame evident in her voice now.

 

“I didn’t want you to know. I also didn’t realize I’d gotten myself in trouble until Wynonna came to find me.” Nicole says, not wanting to face the fact she’d let herself develop scurvy. Thankfully Wynonna caught it early.

 

“I almost lost you once. I can’t bare it again, Nic. Especially now.” She says as she puts her hands under Nicole’s jaw and pulls her up to give her a kiss. It’s awkward and Nicole’s body screams in pain as well as her mouth.

 

“Ouch.” She says quietly when they break for a breath.

 

“You deserve that.” Waverly says, but her tender caress and soft tone speak otherwise.

 

“I don’t deserve you.” Nicole intones sincerely as she rises up on her knees and wraps her arms around Waverly’s middle and lays her head against her chest. “I was so mean. I’m sorry.” She gets out, her voice muffled by Waverly’s dress.

 

“You are forgiven as long as you don’t do that again, understand?” Waverly says as she brings her arms around her shoulders, dipping her head to kiss the top of Nicole’s head.

 

 

 

With a few meals and some additional vitamin C intake provided by a very disappointed Gus, Nicole is feeling back to her old self. Well, not completely, as she’d never be the same after the bear attack, but she had her energy back and she was looking so much better.

 

Wynonna was able to eat her suppers and most breakfasts at the Sheriff’s and she’d traded some work hours with Lonnie for some of his catch. The guy really had a knack for ice fishing it turns out.

 

Poor Waverly didn’t like fish at all, so Nicole did her best to hide in soups and stews, but it was a tall order. Still, she soldiered on, knowing the sacrifice her love had made for them, even if it was ill-conceived, it was right hearted.

 

Mercifully as the days begin to lengthen, the winter begins to loosen its hold if only just a bit. The ice begins to thin over the shallow creek and Nicole’s able to spend some time breaking through it and setting up her sluice box. She begins the laborious process of building small fires to warm the soil enough to dig it out and pour it into the sluice box and continue separating the dirt from their pay streak.

 

The thick vein of gold had begun to thin considerably and even with the added obstacles, she was pulling out much less gold now, but she couldn’t be disappointed. This claim had yielded more than she ever thought it would realistically. When it came time to sell, only then would she hint at its productivity.

 

She’d been pleased with the progress of her left shoulder and arm too. It would never be the same of course, but she could do what she needed to do using it, so she couldn’t complain. Especially when Waverly insisted on massaging it most nights before bed and with Nicky sleeping longer hours and Waverly and Nicole both having more energy, the massages sometimes even led to other things.

 

As Nicole waits for more earth to thaw, she sits out at the mouth of the shaft, chewing on a piece of smoked fish as she recalls their first time being intimate with Waverly after Nicky was born. If anyone would be looking at her right now, they’d see a blushing, love-sick fool.

 

_Nicole is dressing for bed when she feels Waverly’s eyes on her. She turns and smiles as she watches her sit up and scoot herself upright on the headboard._

_“Come here and let me see your arm.” She commands softly and Nicole walks over, long johns left unbuttoned down to her navel._

_She sits down next to Waverly’s hip facing her and Waverly slowly slips the top part of the long johns down as Nicole pulls her arm out. The air in the room shifts from warm and comfortable to hot and charged as Waverly runs her fingers over the scars, starting from Nicole’s collarbone down to her elbow. Nicole’s skin breaks out in gooseflesh as she feels her nipples stiffen. Waverly begins to work her fingers slow with measured firmness along the muscles, feeling knots where the muscle had grown back together. Nicole closes her eyes and begins to breath steadily through her mouth as Waverly’s strong, sure hands work out all the ache and pain in her shoulder, biceps and triceps._

_Her eyes remain closed when she feels Waverly’s fingers leave her arm and move to her cheek, leaving a trail of fire as she gently follows the trail of scars, ending to the one that had nearly bisected her nipple. When Waverly’s finger slowly circles the taut flesh, she’s spurred into action, leaning forward and bracing her arm on the other side of Waverly’s hip as she brings her right hand up to her jaw to capture her lips in a searing, deep kiss that’s been brewing since the middle of winter._

_Their lips and tongues slide together, noisily and desperately as both of Waverly’s hands slide up between them to palm both of Nicole’s breasts. Nicole moans into Waverly’s mouth and she pulls away breathless._

_“Nicky..” Nicole whispers as she looks over to the basinet._

_“Sleeping soundly.” Waverly responds distractedly as she pushes Nicole’s long johns off the other shoulder. Nicole hurriedly stands and lets them slip all the way off and lets out a breath through her nose as Waverly stares at her body hungrily before lifting her hips and pulling her night gown over them and then leaning up to discard it altogether._

_Nicole’s eyes blaze as she takes in her fully naked body, her once again taut belly, her full breasts. She puts a knee on the bed, intending to climb over to the other side of Waverly, but Waverly catches her by the hip, making her stop and straddle her. Nicole stays still, wondering what Waverly is doing until she watches her slowly rise up from her pillow and take Nicole’s scarred nipple in her mouth._

_It’s the first time they’ve ever done something like this and Nicole thinks she is about to come undone at the sensation. Her hips drop down against Waverly’s waist and immediately her nether lips find friction against Waverly’s short hairs and pubic bone. Waverly’s lips pull away and she stares up at Nicole in wonder as her hands go down to Nicole’s hips, fingers digging in ever so slightly._

_She watches intently as Nicole’s eyes close and she begins to rock against her. She looks down at the sight, Nicole’s red short hairs, tangling with her light brown ones, the glistening of Nicole’s arousal below her belly button. She feels like she may faint from the vision, the sensation, even the smell._

_“Is this alright?” Nicole pants, eyes open and regarding Waverly with desperate need as her pace quickens. Waverly would rather die than tell her to stop as she nods quickly continuing to stare up at her love’s face, lost in impending rapture._

_She feels herself climbing as well and cants her hips up to try and gain some friction. Just as she does, Nicole gasps and bares down, almost painfully so and then lets out a long, barely contained moan as a new flood of arousal courses between the both of them._

_Waverly is slightly disappointed though when Nicole rises up. She leans forward and kisses her deeply, leaving her damp curls in exposed air. The sensation isn’t altogether unpleasant but she wishes…_

_“I would like to try something, if you’d allow it..” Nicole says in a low, breathy tone. Waverly looks at her expectantly, thinking she’d try anything the redhead wanted right now._

_Her hips shift to the side of Waverly and Waverly’s head follows her as Nicole bites her lips, obviously a bit hesitant._

_“What is it, Nic?” She asks, reaching to stroke her cheek._

_“Well, men talk, you know.. about women. And some say that it drives a woman crazy when they use their tongue..” She trails off and looks down at Waverly’s curls._

_“Oh?” Waverly says, her mind instantly trying to visualize that._

_“Did Champ ever…?” Nicole asks, hating to even bring his name up._

_“No, never.” Waverly says, not wanting to expound on anything Champ did or didn’t do to bring her pleasure when they’d lie together._

_“Would you like me to?” Nicole asks shyly even as she runs a fingertip between Waverly’s full breasts to her belly button._

_Waverly contemplates the question for only a second before she’s nodding slowly, looking into Nicole’s eyes. Nicole lets a small, dimpled smile cross over her face before she begins to slip down and over Waverly’s leg, gently moving them apart so she can fit in between them._

_The musk that hits Nicole’s nose literally makes her mouth water and she has to stop herself to check with Waverly before running her tongue through her curls._

_She looks up and sees Waverly staring down at her. “You okay?” Nicole asks and Waverly immediately nods and with that, Nicole dips her head and runs her tongue through Waverly’s wet folds. Waverly jumps so much she bumps Nicole’s nose. Waverly lets out a mortified gasp and asks if she’s okay._

_“I’m fine, you?” Nicole chuckles as she brings a hand up to caress her pubic bone._

_“Yes. I was just.. You can continue.” She says finally, a little out of breath. Nicole repeats the same motion albeit slower and is rewarded with a much more pleasurable sounding breathy gasp as Waverly’s hips undulate gently and her legs widen just a bit. Encouraged, Nicole swirls her tongue through her nether lips, pushing her tongue deeper until her chin and nose stop her and repeating anything that seems to elicit the most reaction from the brunette until Waverly’s hips are rocking slowly against her mouth and she feels her shudder, calling her name out softly. She continues until Waverly gently tugs at her hair._

_“Come up here.” She says, voice raspy. Nicole crawls up her body and comes to rest against her side, leg thrown over both of Waverly’s that haven’t had any inclination to come back together yet._

_“You made me see stars.” Waverly says dreamily as she turns her head to look at Nicole as if she’d hung them_ and _the moon._

_Nicole just laughs and brings her face in close, rubbing their noses together as she reaches her arm across Waverly’s ribcage and pulls her in tight._

_“I take it you like it then.” Nicole whispers through a smug grin, making Waverly shyly turn away. Nicole stops her with a fingertip to her jaw, her eyes shining with immense affection and love._

_“I love you, Waverly Haught, and I’d be more than happy to make you see stars whenever you desire.” She says as she brings her jaw back around and captures her lips in a sweet kiss._


	32. More Than Okay with That

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had some time to write today, so.... here you go!

Waverly sits out on the porch with a bundled up, sleeping baby Nicolas as she watches Nicole work the rocker box. With spring finally starting she knows she needs to be more careful in regards to Nicole as more and more people are out and about, resuming their outdoor work and activities. That was signaled this morning when Nicole had asked Waverly to cut her hair shorter and had wrapped her breasts before leaving to work the mine.

 

It was something she hadn’t done all winter and it gave Waverly pause on how lackadaisical she’d been about referring to Nicolas as Nicole and treating her as she would a female lover (though she had no experience to draw on, she _did_ know about the dynamics of husbands and wives and they were vastly different.)

 

It also means that their year on the claim is almost up. Waverly shakes her head, simply in disbelief that they’d been here almost a year. Her life has fundamentally changed in almost every way but she knows she wouldn’t have it any different. Well, there are things she wished didn’t happen, but she is here with a now fully healthy Nicole, baby Nicolas and Wynonna, so at the moment, all is well.

 

She’s been thinking a lot about Nicole these last few weeks and how she’s going to navigate knowing her true identity and having to live with Nicole as Nicolas, her husband. She’s glad she thought of using ‘Nic’ when addressing her, as that meant less chance of slipping up, name wise. And slipping up could have deadly consequences.

 

When she’d first found out about Nicole, after the shock and feelings of betrayal faded, she realized how much she admired her. To take such a drastic step to live her life the way she wanted. How frightening it must have been at first. And especially when she’d tell Waverly about the jobs she’d take where she was out in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of men who she wouldn’t trust in her own house. She’d told her about a few times she’d nearly been caught and each time, Waverly felt her heart rate rise and her mouth go dry as if it were happening real time.

 

And now, with little Nicolas, the stakes were just so much higher. Nicole getting caught would not only affect her, it would affect Waverly and the baby. And even though the mere thought has her losing her breath in fear, she can’t help but take the risk of being with her as a man. That’s how all encompassing and overwhelming her love and devotion for Nicole is. The reality hits her suddenly and she feels a lump form in her throat as she watches her love pull another bucket of dirt out of the shaft.

 

She’s working so hard to make sure they have enough money to make the journey back down to the lower 48 and begin the next chapter of their lives where she and baby Nicolas will want for nothing. She smiles at a memory from last night when they were lying in bed, Waverly tucked into Nicole’s chest after quietly making love while the baby slept soundly.

 

_“With what we have hidden away under us, I figure we can afford about 50 acres and around 20-25 head of cattle. We’ll have goats and some chickens for fresh eggs and milk.” Nicole thinks aloud as she strokes Waverly’s forearm that is lying across her chest._

_“Of course we have to have indoor plumbing and a nice tub for you and Nicky. And a knitting room. Anything else you’ve always wanted?” Nicole asks with a grin as she hears Waverly hum in approval._

_“Maybe a piano?” She says after thinking a moment. She’d taken lessons when she was little and wouldn’t mind playing again._

_“Consider it done.” Nicole smiles and leans her head down to kiss Waverly’s forehead._

She’s brought out of the memory when she sees Yukon’s and Qila’s heads rise from their paws as they lay at her feet and then not more than a few seconds later there’s sound of horse hooves. Nicole has a better view than Waverly and looks at her curiously until an incredulous smile breaks out on the redhead’s face. She starts to cross the creek as she pulls her hat off.

 

“A horse, Wynonna?” Nicole laughs as Waverly gingerly gets out of the chair, pulling Nicky into her chest and moving off the cabin porch.

 

“Always wanted one.” She shrugs as she kicks a leg over and slips down with surprising agility. She claps her hands enthusiastically as Nicole goes to take the reigns, petting the small but hardy draft horse’s white snout.

 

“River’s runnin’ again. Supplies are comin’ in day after tomorrow.” She announces with a hoot. The town and her cabin had run dry of whiskey about a month ago and she’d been cranky ever since.

 

“Well, I can’t wait to eat something that isn’t dried, canned or powdered.” Waverly says with a chuckle.

 

“Amen to that.” Nicole echoes as she pulls off her glove to caress Nicky’s head through his knitted cap.

 

“Couldn’t come at a better time as this little guy will be eating solids pretty soon.” Waverly says as she smiles up at Nicole.

 

“Hey, can I speak with you?” Wynonna asks Nicole as her face falls into a serious expression.

 

“Sure.” Nicole says looking at her expectantly. When Wynonna looks from Nicole to Waverly hesitantly, Nicole’s lips form a grim line. “Anything you say to me can be said in front of Waverly.”

 

Wynonna shakes her head slowly rolling her lips between her teeth. She hates having to say this, but she knows it’s for their own good. And this is a perfect example to bring it up with, even if in the end it’s extremely self-serving.

 

“This kind of regard for your wife will raise suspicion.” She states and then pauses as her words sink in. When they do she holds up her hands in apology as both Waverly and Nicole’s eyes narrow. “Think about it. How do husbands treat their wives? Especially in the Lower 48? You both need to think long and hard about how you are gonna forget Nicole is a woman when you are not out here in the isolated wilderness any longer.”

 

Nicole looks at the ground, knowing Wynonna’s right. She looks up at Waverly with an apology ready on her lips. Waverly however just nods. She does understand, even if perhaps it might hurt from time to time. She’s gotten quite used to being on equal footing with Nicole and she knows Nicole feels the same way. But now they will have to get used to living as husband and wife again, with all the inequity and subservience of a male/female relationship.

 

Wynonna stays silent for a moment, letting both of them digest their impending reality. She finally clears her throat as a sheepish grin comes over her face.

 

“And honestly, I just wanted to talk to Nicole first because I know you’ll just get mad and not hear me out.” Wynonna admits.

 

“Fine.” Waverly huffs and tightens her hold on Nicky before stomping back to the cabin.

 

“She’s gonna be a lot of fun, Nicolas. I hope you are prepared.” Wynonna says after they both hear the abrupt opening and then heavy thud of the cabin door.

 

“Not in the least am I prepared, Wynonna.” She says slowly as she turns her attention back to her sister in law.

 

“So, what’s on your mind?” She asks.

 

“I want to buy the claim from you when it’s up for sale again. Stay an extra year.” Wynonna says resolutely.

 

“You won’t be traveling with us in June then?” Nicole asks, both surprised and disappointed.

 

“I have traveled for all of my adult life, never laying down roots for want of another new adventure. But I love it here in the Yukon. The beauty, the harshness and unpredictability of it… besides, Sheriff Nedley’d really like me to stay on. No one’s ever wanted me to stick around.” She admits quietly.

 

“Your sister does. You’re right she will be angry.” Nicole tells her.

 

“But she doesn’t need me. She’s got you.” Wynonna says simply.

 

Nicole regards her quietly, seeing the earnestness in her eyes. Though she’d really like the enigmatic brunette to accompany them, the thought of it just being her, Waverly and Nicky is appealing.

 

“I’m not going to be the one to tell her, you know that right?” Nicole says finally. Wynonna looks at her with large pleading eyes.

 

“Not on your life will I be the one to break that news to her.” Nicole emphasizes with an incredulous chuckle as she pulls her hat and gloves back on and heads back to the rocker.

 

“Good luck, Wynonna.” She calls over her shoulder. “You’re gonna need it.” She murmurs to herself.

 

 

…

 

 

“Boy, that sunshine feels so good.” Nicole announces as she enters the cabin. Her eyes take a moment to adjust to the light difference and when they do, they see Waverly curled up in bed, Nicky softly gurgling in his crib that Nicole had just finished building to accommodate the growing boy.

 

“Waverly, are you okay?” Nicole asks. It isn’t abnormal for Waverly to lie down for a bit, but seeing as Wynonna had probably told her the news of her staying, she wanted to see how she is faring.

 

The telltale sniffling let Nicole know she’d been crying and she quickly moves to the bed and sits on the space between Waverly and the edge of the bed with Waverly facing her.

 

“I guess I should have seen it coming. I’m still mad though. I thought she’d join us and perhaps work the ranch with us or… I don’t know.” Waverly gets out with a sigh.

 

Nicole stays silent, just strokes her hair as Waverly balls her fists up under the pillow.

 

“We also talked about you. She’s so worried that someone will find out.” Waverly says, looking up at Nicole then. She can see it’s obviously a concern for Waverly too.

 

“I know how to be a man, Waverly. I’ve done it for over three years now.” Nicole says, picking her words carefully for maximum assurance.

 

“She says the way you look at me and treat me makes you look soft, weak. It won’t play when we are in the barely settled West, she said.” Waverly continues, eyes breaking away from Nicole’s in sadness.

 

“Do you want me to leave then? Do you want to not do this, Waverly?” Nicole asks, barely able to keep the abject devastation out of her voice.

 

Waverly sits up so quickly it nearly knocks Nicole off the bed. “No!” Waverly says, “I mean, yes, of course I want to be with you! I’m just so damn scared I’ll mess up…” She says desperately. Nicole wraps her up in a hug, tucking her head under her chin and holding her tight while a relieved sigh escapes her lips.

 

“Listen, I have faith in you. And I also think we need to talk about Nicky. I don’t think he should ever know my true identity.” Nicole says solemnly. “I think that might be easier on you too. I will be your husband, his father, full stop.” Nicole says and pulls Waverly away only enough to look into her eyes to see if she agrees.

 

“I think it’s best as well. No need to burden the boy with a secret.” Waverly says and looks up at Nicole with apologetic eyes.

 

“Even though he’s only 3 months old, I think from here on out, I need to be Nicolas. _Your_ Nicolas.” Nicole beams as she lies Waverly back down gently and presses their lips together in a deep kiss.

 

Waverly’s arms come around her shoulders, pulling them even tighter. When she breaks for breath she smiles up at those soft brown eyes and that damned dimple. “As long as you are Nicole in our bed, I’m more than okay with that.”

 

 

 

 


	33. Forever Yours

“That’s it, son!” Nicole exclaims as she lets go of Nicky’s chubby little hand, watching him balance on his cotton diaper padded butt. She laughs as he waves his arms enthusiastically but remains upright unlike the other four previous times. “You’re sitting up! All by yourself!” She announces as she watches him with pride. He giggles along with her and leans towards her finally knocking himself off balance. She scoops him up quickly though and nibbles his belly making him laugh.

 

Waverly had quietly entered the cabin and had caught most of the interaction, beaming the entire time. She finally makes herself known when Nicole sets him down so he can try again.

 

“Did I miss a milestone while I was out for all of an hour?” Waverly asks and both father and son whip their head around at her voice.

 

Nicky immediately waves his arms in excitement as she comes closer.

 

“Just having a sitting up session.” Nicole explains with a wide smile as Waverly leans down to give her a sound kiss.

 

“How’s Gus?” She asks as Waverly sits down next to her.

 

“She’s good. She’s compiling a list of medicinal herbs and plants we can pick along the way to Skagway. I think she thinks we are walking there.” Waverly giggles.

 

“Thankfully not.” Nicole rejoins with a happy sigh. With the amount of gold she’s pulled out of their mine, they are able to rent a horse and wagon that will comfortably carry all they plan to take back with them, which fortunately is a whole lot less than they were required to bring up.

 

Also the trip will take a fraction of the time since they’ll be riding and there won’t be a need to go back and forth to transport items. With luck, they’ll be pulling into the Port of San Francisco in late July with a tentative plan to settle somewhere in the general area provided they find land suitable for their small ranch.

 

“Have you and Wynonna come to an agreement on the claim?” Waverly asks after they sit for a few moments watching Nicky abandon his sitting up session and is now on his belly drooling on the bear rug, mesmerized by the fire.

 

“We’ve decided just to go with fair market price.” Nicole answers with a shrug.

 

“That makes sense. Who else would refuse to pay for a claim they thought was priced too low?” Waverly laughs, thinking about her sister and husband squabbling over the price with Wynonna offering more and Nicole refusing to take it.

 

“When we are in San Francisco, we’ll surprise Jack and give him the money from the sale. He’ll be flabbergasted at how much he’s missed!” Nicole chuckles as Waverly heartily agrees. They are looking forward to catching up with the author and activist after getting a telegram from him letting them know where he ended up and what he’s doing.

 

Waverly scoots closer to Nicole until Nicole opens her legs and guides Waverly in between them. She wraps her arm around her waist, feeling the constricting corset and leans back to undo Waverly’s dress.

 

Waverly turns around, eyes wide at Nicole’s boldness until she sheepishly tells her she’s just going to help loosen her corset. Waverly gladly assists and leans forward as much as she can until she feels the laces release and with it a nice deep breath.

 

“Goodness I don’t miss those one bit.” Nicole says with a slow shake of her head. “You know, if you don’t want to wear one, I wouldn’t say a word.” She adds.

Waverly turns fully into Nicole and places a sweet kiss to her jaw. “Thank you Sweetheart. Yet another benefit for having a woman as a husband.” She beams as Nicole blushes a bit. She brings her eyes back up to Waverly, her eyes suddenly a bit dark.

 

“Can you list some other benefits, Mrs. Haught?” She asks in a quiet drawl. This time, Waverly blushes.

 

“Maybe tonight after Nicky is sound asleep.” She murmurs as she places a hand on Nicole’s upper thigh. They regard each other with a mild but growing hunger until Nicky begins to whimper, breaking them out of their spell.

 

“Come on little man, I’ll whip you up some nice mashed peas.” Nicole says as she pulls herself up and picks up the baby, leaving Waverly to smile fondly after them.

 

…

 

 

Nicole wipes the sweat from her brow as she sets down the one hundredth- or thousandth- bucket for the day. As she did last year during late spring, when the sun was up, she was working, and the sun was up about sixteen hours a day.

 

“Hey Haught!” She hears and turns to see Wynonna, sans bandolier and badge ambling towards her as she leaves her horse, appropriately named Whiskey, grazing between the cabins.

 

She finishes pouring the soil into the rocker as Wynonna approaches.

 

“Say _‘Thank you, dear sister in law’_.” She commands with an airy tone and Nicole just straightens up and stares at her blankly.

 

“What am I thanking you for?” Nicole finally asks as she takes her place at the rocker, moving it back and forth with practiced ease.

 

“I’m taking your boy for one night, and one night only, tomorrow.” She announces with great fanfare.

 

“Excuse me?” Nicole says, stopping her rocking and looking up at her.

 

“I asked Waverly what she’d like as a going away present and she said she’d like me to take Nicky for a night. Something about you not properly courtin’ her…” Wynonna trails off, knowing that would stick in the redhead’s craw.

 

“She said that?” Nicole asks and Wynonna struggles to hold a straight face at Nicole’s wounded dog look.

 

She can’t hold it long though and just shakes her head. “No, but she would very much enjoy being taken out for an evening of dining and entertainment by her husband.” Wynonna says with a wide smirk. “Oh, and she said for you to book a room at the Klondike Inn.” She adds as she turns around and heads back towards her cabin.

 

…

 

“Are you sure she can handle caring for Nicky an entire night?” Nicole asks, concerned as she bounces the five month old on her knee.

 

“I trust her, Nic. He’s on solid food now, and he’s been sleeping nearly through the night. He’ll be tuckered out after his walk with you today, so..” Waverly says as a big smile spreads across her face as she recalls Nicole cutting out early and coming to get the boy so they could go explore up the creek before his parents leave for town for the night.

 

She knew Nic would be a good father, but the bond the two have already created makes her heart flutter every time she sees it in action.

 

“Alright.” Nicole finally says as she picks up their overnight bag and leans down to give Nicky a kiss on his forehead as he squirms around on the bear rug.

 

Wynonna comes back in with her little overnight bag as well as she’ll be staying in the main cabin with the little guy.

 

“Go on you two. Have a good time. Don’t get her pregnant.” Wynonna warns and Nicole’s eyes nearly encompass her whole face in shock and embarrassment.

 

“Wynonna!” Waverly chastises her with a sharp tone and embarrassed smile.

 

 

As they walk along the freshly repaired packed-earth trail, taking in the sweet smells of late spring blossoms, Nicole gently pulls Waverly’s hand from the crook of her arm so she can reach into her breast pocket. She pulls out a bag of gold dust and hands it to Waverly.

 

“When we get to town, go to that ready-made dress shop that just opened up and pick yourself out something for tonight.”

Waverly looks at her for a few seconds as an excited smile spreads across her face. She’d been planning on wearing the one nice dress she’d gotten from Jack.

 

“I’ll get us checked in and take our bags up to our room and wait for you in the lobby.” Nicole says, looking down at a beaming Waverly.

 

“I never did get to court you proper, so this is my one shot.” She says, her voice now back into it’s practiced lower octave.

 

Its quite fascinating, Waverly thinks, the subtle changes Nicole employs to become Nicolas. Everything that attracted her to him at first has always been there, but knowing his secret, it just enhances all of those qualities ten-fold. When they are out like this though, she really does sometimes forget that Nicolas is in fact Nicole. And then _he’ll_ do something that reminds her and it simply sets Waverly’s heart on fire.

 

Once they reach town, Waverly holds Nicole’s arm a little tighter and smiles as Nicole’s posture straightens and she walks just a bit taller, chest pushed out.

 

She can’t help but tease. “If you had feathers, they’d be fanned out like a peacock’s, I think.” Waverly tilts up to say into Nic’s ear.

 

“I have the most beautiful woman in Canada on my arm as my wife.” She answers with a rakish grin that makes Waverly’s heart stammer.

 

“Here’s your stop, Mrs. Haught. I’ll be waiting for you in the lobby at the hotel so you may get ready in our room.” Her husband says with a short bow. Waverly giggles at the act and reaches up to put her hand on his cheek, caressing it lovingly.

 

“I won’t be long, Mr. Haught.”

 

…

 

 

Waverly shook her head slowly at the smug grin on Nicolas’ face when she met him in the lobby. He immediately stood up and tossed the newspaper he was reading to the side as his eyes danced in merriment.

 

“You are a clever, sweet, caring man and I’m not sure what I did to deserve you.” She says as she approaches him with her freshly painted and manicured nails and perfectly styled hair.

 

He’d been waiting to see her reaction ever since the shop boy had delivered her dress and a message to Nicolas telling him thank you and that she was totally surprised when she was whisked away to the hair and nail salon promptly upon picking out her dress for the evening.

 

“I set it all up when I came in to book our room yesterday.” He confesses with a dimpled grin.

 

“Well, it was just amazing and I thank you.” She says and gets up on her tiptoes to give him a modest peck on the side of his lips.

 

“I see you had a trip to the haberdashery and barber?” She says, noting the new three-piece suit with high collar and bright yellow bowtie and his trimmed hair that is currently combed back with a neat part to the side with rather frank appraisal that has Nicolas blushing a bit.

 

“I did.” He says, self-consciously smoothing the back of his head with his hand. “Your dress is upstairs, room 214. I’ll be down here waiting.” He says with a wide smile as he hands her the key.

 

“I won’t be too long.” Waverly murmurs as she takes the key, squeezing the strong, calloused hand.

 

 

Nicolas is at the bar just to the right of the stairs talking to the bartender when he senses more than sees Waverly walking down. He turns and sets his glass of whiskey down slowly as he takes her in.

 

She’s in a pale yellow summer evening gown made of silk and lace that shows off her fine shoulders with just a hint at the fullness of her breasts. The dress is sleeveless as well and is accented with white silk gloves and her neck adorned with the locket he’d bought her for Christmas.

 

He walks to the foot of the stairs before she can descend the last one as he couldn’t have her walking alone for one more second. She takes the last step with her hand in his as she smiles radiantly if not a bit shyly.

 

“I have no words, Waverly. You are simply a vision.” Nicolas says, low and awestruck. “Shall we go to dinner?” He asks with a smile.

 

Waverly’s heart feels like it just might beat out of her chest, she’s so very happy. She’d hoped to get a reaction from her love, and he certainly didn’t disappoint. She’d never been looked at with such love and pride and it took her a moment of mentally pinching herself to realize this was her life now.

 

“Lead the way, dear husband.” She grins, eyes glistening.

 

They make their way out to the boardwalk, only having to walk half a block to their destination. “My tie makes more sense now, right?” Nicolas asks as he pulls at it playfully.

 

“How did you know?” Waverly asks, craning to look at it again with a giggle.

 

“When the shop boy brought your dress, I took a little peek. Just to see the color.” He informs quickly. “Ran back to the haberdashery and picked it up.”

 

“Well, your attention to detail is commended.” She says, still trying to reign in a smile.

 

 

They spend dinner talking about their upcoming trek back down to the Lower 48 and Waverly listens, somewhat entranced at Nicolas’ plans for their modest ranch.

 

“And how about you, Waverly?” She hears and sits back in her chair a bit.

 

“What do you mean?” She asks, honestly puzzled.

 

“When we find our piece of land, what else should we have? Is there anything else you’d want to do?” He asks.

 

She sits and stares for a moment, not even sure how to consider the question.

 

“I hadn’t really thought… I just figured I’d run the household, take care of Nicky…” She says with a small shrug.

 

“Yes, but, wouldn’t you like to do more? I mean, you’re whip smart, always wanting to learn new things..” He says as he leans over a bit, taking her hand in his. “I’d like to hope this isn’t just my dream we are going after.” He tells her, eyes a bit concerned.

 

“I…” She starts, but realizes, she’s never really thought much about it. She craved adventure when she was younger and boy did she get it in spades. But now, settling down and running a ranch with Nicolas and raising their son is all she could think to want. That and maybe her music.

 

“Perhaps I can teach piano? Singing? Maybe perform at small events? I used to sing quite a bit where I grew up.” She says, warming to the idea more and more.

 

“I know I would love to hear you play and sing. Two times I was at death’s door and heard you singing, thinking I’d been watched over by an angel, which isn’t far from the truth.” He smiles, making Waverly roll her eyes and squeeze his hand affectionately.

 

“I’d love to play and sing for you, my love.” She says, eyes turning serious, darkening as she regards him.

 

Nicolas feels the shift in mood viscerally and anxiously lets the waiter know they’ll be concluding their meal immediately.

 

 

 

Several hours later they find themselves tangled together, breathing having leveled out a time ago. Waverly is content to lay against Nicole’s breast, hands entwined against the redhead’s stomach as her other hand lazily strokes through Waverly’s slightly dampened hair.

 

“Are you disappointed I’m not really a man?”

 

The question comes unexpectedly and Waverly picks her head up and looks into Nicole’s eyes, seeing clear trepidation in them. When Waverly doesn’t answer right away, Nicole looks off into a corner of the room.

 

“Are you disappointed I can’t do what a man… can do?” She elaborates, still not able to look at Waverly.

 

Waverly almost wants to laugh and ask if she really can’t tell she’s the opposite of disappointed in what Nicole _can_ and _does_ to her, but she knows she owes her an honest and complete answer.

 

She lays her head back down. Waverly doesn’t think she’ll ever get used to this want she has for Nicole. She hadn’t really delved into the fact that her physical attraction to Nicolas only grew exponentially when she found out and accepted that Nicolas was Nicole.

 

But the first thought that comes to her mind is about that night Nicky was conceived. She buries her head a bit deeper into Nicole’s breast, figuring if Nicole’s ready to hear her answer, she’s ready to hear a confession she’s kept to herself for over a year.

 

“You remember that morning at Lake Bennett when Champ let it be known that we….” She begins but is cut off by a tensing Nicole.

 

“Yes, I remember.” She says immediately, jaw tight. Waverly smiles into her soft skin and squeezes the hand that’s resting on her chest.

 

“Well, that night, all I could think of was how I wished it to be you.” She says quietly, squeezing her eyes shut as she waited for Nicole’s reaction. She held her breath as she kept silent, having to finally take a breath while the room remained absolutely quiet.

 

Suddenly, Waverly realizes she must have taken that as her answer and looks up to see Nicole’s eyes still staring off into the corner, this time looking infinitely sad.

 

“Hey, I didn’t mean it..” Waverly says and then groans in mild frustration. “Look at me.” She says sternly and Nicole obeys.

 

“I am not disappointed in the slightest. I only told you that because I wanted you to know how long I’ve desired your touch. I felt incredibly guilty at the time and of course after… but I need you to know, I wouldn’t change a damn thing about you. About us, this.” She says desperately.

 

“I didn’t know this want of another person’s touch even existed before you, Nicole. The way you hold me, the way you respond to my touch, to my lips, my fingers.” Waverly whispers, beginning to demonstrate.

 

Nicole finally breaks out of her stoic frown and pulls Waverly up to her, kissing her deeply, tongue pressing into her mouth and Waverly welcoming it with a soft moan. Nicole pushes Waverly gently onto her back and traces fingertips, feather light over breastbone, stomach, belly button, hips until they reach her still damp curls. She pushes into her entrance unapologetically and Waverly whimpers at being taken with such gentle command. She opens her eyes and sees Nicole staring back, present, giving, attentive, loving.

 

“I love it when you make me yours, Mr. Haught.” She says in a heated whisper. She tilts her chin up to meet Nicole’s lips again and pulls back just enough to add, “Make me yours forever, Nicole.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm sure you all saw this is second to last chapter. Figured I could end it there or continue on with another installment that would basically be a sequel. What say you all? I'm always a fan of stories not wearing out their welcome and ending where they feel needs ending... so give me your thoughts!


	34. Absolutely

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here it is. The end of part one. The response has been overwhelming for a part two, so I will be working on that. I don't think their story is finished either! And boy do I have some ideas! lol
> 
> Thanks again to all those who have taken the time to read and especially comment along the way. I read every one and you all inspire me to keep writing. Absolutely love your thoughtful, insightful, funny comments!

Waverly smiles softly, stroking short red locks as Nicole’s head rests just below her breasts. She’s not sure how on earth they fell asleep in this position, but as the daybreak sun, bright as middle of the day in the late spring, pushes through a small slit in the heavy felt curtains, she figures they just literally passed out like this.

 

Nicole is yet to stir however so Waverly’s hand travels down the back of her neck, to her strong back. Not quite able to reach her firm backside she brings her hand back up and settles for pressing her fingers into her knotted shoulder muscles.

 

“You keep doing that and I’ll never get up.” She hears a muffled groan and smirks.

 

“Well if you don’t want the chambermaid to come in and see you in your altogether, you might want to rethink that.” Waverly giggles.

 

“Oh! What time is it?” Nicole asks, voice still raspy as she lifts off of Waverly and stretches across her to grab her timepiece. Waverly is rewarded with a nice view of her small breasts and outstretched arm showing off her long, sinewy muscles in her chest and shoulder. She can’t believe she still feels so wanton after they spent hours making love last night.

 

As Nicole sets her watch down and moves to slide off of Waverly, Waverly wraps her arms around her, causing Nicole to look at her curiously. Her curiosity is instantly wiped away when she looks into Waverly’s darkening eyes. She moves to become parallel with the brunette and then crawls atop her fully, using her arms to hold up most of her weight as one thigh slides between her wife’s.

 

“We have a few more minutes yet.” The redhead smiles rakishly.

 

 

 

Some time later, Waverly lies in bed as she watches Nicole transform into Nicolas. She watches as she pulls on her men’s breeches, socks, trousers. When she picks up her wrap, Waverly sits up and puts a hand on her shoulder.

 

“Allow me?” Waverly asks shyly. Nicole looks at her for a moment and then wordlessly hands over the rather scratchy, dense muslin wrap. She makes a mental note to find material that would be more soft and suitable and she’d sew something that would be easier, quicker to put on if needed.

 

Nicole raises both arms as Waverly comes to the front of her, holding one end tight to her side before winding it around her breasts. “You can pull tighter.” Nicole says quietly as she watches Waverly help her with the most intimate and important ritual she performs to become Nicolas.

 

“It’s funny, you know. It’s like I’m in love with two people.” Waverly comments, seemingly to herself, as she finishes wrapping and then fastening it securely. She pats Nicole’s chest gently and looks up into Nicole’s searching eyes that patiently wait for an explanation.

 

“There’s Nicole: sweet, loving, passionate and breathtakingly beautiful.” Waverly says, cupping her cheek. “Then there’s Nicolas: Thoughtful, hardworking, brave and incredibly handsome.” She says with a warm smile. When she sees a conflicted expression come over the redhead, she can all but read her thoughts. She leans in to kiss her reassuringly.

 

“I can’t believe how lucky I am to have all those qualities possessed by one person. It’s unfortunate for the rest of the world how I get to have you all to myself like this.” She says, idly running her hands through red hair, getting it back into order.

 

Nicole reaches down and pulls at the backs of Waverly’s still naked thighs until she is sitting in her lap. “I love you so, so much, Waverly.” She whispers against her lips before taking them in a deep kiss as her arms go tight low around her waist.

 

When Waverly feels the mood shift suddenly, she breaks the kiss. “We certainly have no more time, Mr. Haught. Let’s get dressed and peek in to see Gus before going home.”

 

Nicole huffs but nods, pulling on her shirt as she gazes at Waverly’s backside as she gathers her clothes to get dressed for the day.

 

…

 

Gus is already teary-eyed by the time Waverly finishes writing out the address of the hotel they’ll be staying at in San Francisco upon arrival.

 

“We will be there at least a week, if not more. When we do move, we’ll leave a forwarding address.” Waverly informs her, not able to look up at the woman for fear her tears will begin too.

 

Nicolas comes up behind her and puts a comforting hand to her shoulder and then brings himself up close to her back. “Please mind Wynonna. She’ll certainly need a friend. She’ll be awfully lonely out there on the claim.” Nicolas tells her.

 

“Of course. But I think she and Mattie will keep each other occupied. Those two are thick as thieves. Heaven help the young, unattached men who might wonder into either of them.” The older woman laughs with a shake of her head.

 

“Fitting that the only two hard drinking, rebellious women in the Yukon would find each other.” Waverly notes with an incredulous smile.

 

“I’ll make sure they stay out of trouble. Well, too much trouble.” Gus promises.

 

“And if and when you find your way to the Lower 48, you’ll always have a place in the West.” Nicolas assures with a warm smile.

 

“Thank you kindly, Nicolas. Now the both of you get. I don’t want to get to blubbering until I absolutely have to.” Gus chides mildly and dismisses them from her store without taking a pinch of gold dust for their modest purchases.

 

…

 

 

Nicole sets about separating the tools she’ll take with her and the ones she’ll leave behind for Wynonna. She makes a mental note on what she’ll need for the ranch. She’s not sure if they’ll be purchasing raw land or an established ranch so she’ll have to prepare for all of it, she guesses, keeping in mind how much room they’ll have on the wagon.

 

Once she has all of it sorted out, she heads up to the cabin for supper.

 

She slows as she hears Wynonna and Waverly talking just inside the cabin. The door is open to let in some fresh air and she can hear them clearly. She stops and listens, her curiosity getting the better of her when she hears Wynonna say her name.

 

“Here’s the account information for the bank in San Francisco. It’s in your name only, okay? Don’t tell Nicole about it. It’s just for emergency. For you and Nicky.” Wynonna says and Nicole can hear the rustle of paper.

 

“Wynonna, I don’t need this. What are you talking about? Why would I keep it from Nicole?” She asks, voice rising in confusion and irritation.

 

“If she’s found out, there’s no way they’re going to believe you didn’t know. They can jail or hang you too, Waverly. Think of Nicky. If you have to run, you’ll have the means.” Wynonna says, honest concern evident in her voice.

 

There’s a long silence and Nicole holds her breath waiting to see what Waverly will respond. Waiting to see if Waverly really does trust her to protect her and Nicky if it came down to it.

 

“Okay. You’re right.” She finally hears Waverly say, so quiet she had to strain her hearing. She feels her heart break at her answer, effectively crushing her buoyant mood she’d been in all day. _Will it always be this way? Will there always be this abject fear lurking around the corner at every turn along with any joy and happiness they experience? And really how can Waverly count on her fully when she has such an illicit secret?_

 

Later that night, dinner is a fairly solemn affair. They are all sitting around the table, Nicky in Waverly’s lap picking at his own little plate as well as his mother’s as Waverly tries to eat the bigger pieces first before he can bring them to his mouth.

 

They leave in two days time and Nicole’s been trying to give the sisters time and space. She’s still upset about their overheard conversation and she’s having a hard time being around them.

 

“I’m going to take Nicky into town if that’s okay? I need to pick up a few things.” Nicole announces and goes to lift him out of Waverly’s lap.

 

“His bed time is pretty soon, Nic.” Waverly says, looking up at Nicole’s face with surprise.

 

“I won’t be long. Enjoy your sister time.” She says grabbing her light coat and the animal fur papoose that was a gift from one of the First Nation ladies that help Gus out at her apothecary.

 

Waverly just watches wordlessly as Nicole puts an excited Nicky into his little rig and straps him on with practiced ease and heads out the door.

 

“Maybe she’s having her monthly.” Wynonna says with a shrug, eyes widening in contrite indignation when Waverly pointedly glares at her.

 

She’s still feeling uneasy about Wynonna telling her to keep her emergency funds a secret from Nicole. It just doesn’t sit right with her.

 

“Come on. Let’s go for a walk.” Wynonna says with conciliatory expression as she waves her hand towards the door.

 

Waverly has been wanting to ask about her sister’s plans after Dawson, but is afraid of the answer. She has this sinking feeling that this will be the last time they’ll spend any meaningful time together. Having her live with them these past months has been a balm to Waverly’s soul in regards to missing her family.

 

“You excited to head back to the States?” Wynonna asks as they meander over a well-worn trail that leads to a meadow.

 

“I am. I’m excited for warmer weather. I’m excited for moonlit summer nights.” She says with a smile.

 

“You ready to be a rancher’s wife?” Wynonna asks quietly, anticipating an exasperated from her younger sister.

 

“I _want_ to be Nicolas’ wife. I want to be Nicky’s mother. I’m happy Wynonna.” She says thoughtfully, meaning it. “And I’m going to be doing singing and piano lessons. Remember how much I loved doing that before Champ?” Waverly asks with a wistful smile.

 

“I remember you talking about getting out of our small town. I remember you talking endlessly about seeing the world and going on adventures.” Wynonna replies as she looks at her sister.

 

“And look where I am!” Waverly says, now showing a bit of exasperation. “I’m not sure where you get that I’m settling or not doing the things I wish most to do.” She responds, irritation turning to sadness.

 

“You can stay up here with me. You and Nicky! We’d have a great time! And enough gold to do whatever we want! Go to Europe! South America! I remember you said you’ve always wanted to learn different languages!” Wynonna has stopped now, eyes bright and emotional.

 

Waverly looks at her for a long time. She takes in a couple of deep breaths, letting them out with a sigh. “Wynonna, if I still wanted to do all of that, I can ask Nicolas and you know what? He’d drop everything and buy us all steamship passage to wherever I want to go. He’d do that for me.” Waverly says, her eyes fervent, earnest.

 

When Wynonna doesn’t respond, only looking at her with mild skepticism, Waverly tosses her arms up in a show of defeat.

“Wynonna, all I want is to be with him and Nicky. I don’t care where. And honestly, the thought of building a home, making friends, helping Nicolas tend to the animals, having my own little piano room and perhaps trying my hand at singing in a show on occasion, that’s all I truly want now. It’s more than enough. And when Nicky is grown with his own family, I know Nicolas and I can travel to wherever we want, if it’s what I desire.”

 

She feels a few tears form in her eyes and wipes them away, upset at having to justify her life choices to her sister and irritated that she cared so much to do it.

 

Wynonna softens though and grabs her sister’s hand, making her look up at her.

 

“I do like Nicolas. I think.. he’s a an incredible person. But I worry about…” She looks around to make sure there isn’t another soul anywhere near them. “What if his secret is revealed? It makes me sick to think this could harm you and Nicky.” She admits slowly.

 

“It would make us all sick, Wynonna, But it’s a risk that I committed to take on wholeheartedly a while ago. Nicolas and I have talked about it endlessly and we both know the stakes are too high for mistakes or carelessness. I trust him implicitly and I know if hard decisions need to be made, we’ll make them, together. The least you can do is trust _me_ implicitly that I know what I’m getting into and I know what I’m doing.” Waverly counters as she looks her sister square in the eyes.

 

“I just… I just want what’s best for you and Nicky.” She says with an earnestness Waverly doesn’t see often from her sister.

 

“I know you do, as do I. Nicolas is it for us, Wynonna.” She replies, pleading with her sister to understand.

 

When Wynonna falls silent and Waverly can see she’s thinking about what she said, she lets a small smile take over her face as she casually grabs her sister’s elbow. “Know what else would be best for us? You making me a promise _now_ to come stay with us for a spell when your year is up here.” Waverly says, smirking cleverly as Wynonna rolls her eyes, a small smile forming on her lips finally.

 

“I will promise to come see you guys within six months after my year is up here.”

 

“Good enough for me.” Waverly says and holds her hand out for her sister to shake on it. Wynonna gets a cheeky grin on her face and then spits into the palm of her hand, clasping Waverly’s before she can pull it back in disgust.

 

“Wynonna! You are such a child!” Waverly yells, laughing and mortified at the same time.

 

…

 

 

“I’m not sure we should leave Wynonna in charge of shipping it.” Nicolas says as Waverly straightens his tie and runs her hands over the lapels of his charcoal colored sack coat. “You sure you don’t want me to wear my hat?” He asks as Waverly looks up at him with a patient smile.

 

“You aren’t one for photographs are you?” Waverly asks rhetorically as she takes a squirming Nicky from his blanket on the porch and signals to the photographer they are ready to sit for their portrait.

 

Waverly had insisted they take it here in Dawson so she’ll always be reminded of their first big adventure together and it made sense taking it where Nicky was born. Nicole did her one better and convinced Mr. Chetri to come to the cabin so they may take it right in front of their cabin on the porch.

 

“Alright. Mrs. Haught if you could take a seat there. Yes. And the baby right on your knee, perfect. Mr. Haught, go ahead and stand behind your wife, there. Yes, hand on her shoulder, sure… All right, I think we are good. Baby needs to be still… In one, two, three… Got it!” The photographer announces with a wide smile.

 

“Thank you, Mr. Chetri, for coming out to do this.” Waverly smiles as she pulls Nicky up closer to her chest. “If you could give the photo to Gus at the apothecary, she’ll know how to get it to us. You have the locket measurements, correct?” She confirms.

 

“Indeed I do. And you also wanted a large portrait of it as well?” Mr. Chetri asks quietly, having a feeling it was supposed to be a secret from her husband. She nods with a quick smile.

 

Nicolas helps him pack up all of his gear and sends him on his way with a bit of added gold dust for his trouble.

 

“I’m going to go change and finish the wagon strongbox build.” Nicole says immediately after seeing Mr. Chetri off.

 

Waverly has taken Nicole’s mood as preoccupation with their trip and just nods wordlessly. She follows Nicole into the cabin and sets Nicky down with some toys to keep him busy while she gets busy packing up the rest of their things so they’ll be ready to pack the wagon in the early morning and be off right after breakfast.

 

She watches Nicole change, folding up her suit nicely and putting it in one of the two hard suitcases they purchased. She’s out the door without another word and Waverly hopes this dour mood will lift once they are on the road.

 

 

 

Later that night as they get into bed, Nicole pulls Waverly close from behind and speaks quietly into her ear. “I need you to be one hundred per cent sure you want to go with me tomorrow, Waverly. Because if not, perhaps you and Nicky should stay here with Wynonna. Or if you want me to take you back home, I can do that too.”

 

Waverly picks her head up and turns in her arms, looking at Nicole trying to read her eyes as her tone gives very little away. She doesn’t sound petulant nor does she sound resigned, so Waverly’s left to wonder where this is coming from. She doesn’t have to wonder very long though as Nicole continues.

 

“I overheard you and Wynonna and how she set up a separate, secret bank account for you and Nicky should you want to leave.” Nicole states, her expression still unreadable.

 

Waverly sighs deeply, knowing she should have told Nicole about that immediately.

 

“Is this what has been eating at you the last couple of days?” Waverly asks as she brings her hand up to her cheek with a sad smile. Nicole looks away for a moment and then nods once. Now Waverly can see the worry in her brow, in the tenseness around her lips.

 

“Well, I have no intention of going anywhere without you. I was going to tell you about what Wynonna did, I was just going to wait until we were out on the trail so we could talk it out, just you and me. But I can tell you right now, I would never make any decision, especially something like that, without talking with you first. I hope to God never to have to.” Waverly says solemnly.

 

“I know. God above, how I know, Waverly. Sometimes it scares me to death, but then I think of how empty my life would be without you and Nicky now. Is it too selfish of me?” She asks, her eyes near tears and looking as vulnerable as Waverly has ever seen her.

 

“You’d have to ask the same thing of me, then. I can’t imagine life without you now.” Waverly says, caressing her cheek before bringing her hand down to rest against her chest.

 

Nicole pulls Waverly into her and kisses her deeply. Waverly returns it immediately and brings her arm around Nicole’s back, crushing their bodies together until they can’t tell who’s heartbeat is whose.

 

No more words need to be spoken between them as they reaffirm their commitment to each other through their actions, letting their bodies speak for them until Nicole reluctantly reminds Waverly of the long day they have ahead of them come the morning.

 

…

 

“Well, I’m not going to say goodbye, because this isn’t what this is.” Waverly says resolutely as she walks towards her sister who is helping Nicolas tie down the last part of the wagon.

 

She’s emotionally spent from her last visit to Gus earlier that morning and doesn’t think she can part with another tear. She’s counting on her sister to make it easy with her usual nonchalant attitude about parting ways.

 

“Nope. It isn’t.” Wynonna says over her shoulder and turns to smile at her sister. It’s strained and sad, but not overwhelmingly so and Waverly walks into her arms so she doesn’t have to look into those big blue eyes that are trying hard not to reveal too much.

 

“Don’t lose yourself out there in the cow dung, you got it?” Wynonna says into her ear. It makes Waverly burst out into laughter and just like that, her tears start to come unbidden.

 

“Dammit, Wynonna.” She groans as she pulls away to see Wynonna’s eyes shining with unshed tears.

 

“I threatened Nicolas within an inch of his life already, so you don’t have to witness that.” Wynonna says with a small chuckle. “He promised me he will do all he can to make sure you are loved, protected and above all, treated as an equal partner. I know you would have never gotten that from Champ or any other _man_ , so…”

 

“Oh, Wynonna.” Waverly sighs emotionally. She pulls her in for another tight hug, only letting go when she hears Nicolas coming out of the cabin with Nicky.

 

“Please be careful up here. Listen to Gus. We put her in charge of you.” Waverly giggles as Wynonna rolls her eyes.

 

“I’ll be fine. You better get on the road now. I do not envy that ride into White Tail.” Wynonna gives a low whistle.

 

“Yep, gonna be long, but better than carrying a year supply of gear twelve times.” Nicole says and they all hum in agreement on that.

 

Nicole sticks her hand out at Wynonna and Wynonna grasps it tightly as the two regard each other for a good few seconds. “Remember what I said.” Wynonna says almost too quiet to hear. Nicole nods solemnly.

 

“I will.”

 

Waverly has an eye on the exchange as she secures Nicky into his spot behind the wagon bench. She can’t hear what Wynonna says but imagines it wasn’t meant for her ears anyway.

 

Wynonna climbs up quickly to give Nicky a kiss and then ambles back down to check the horses’ harnesses and the rest of their tack. She gives each horse a pat on the snout and then comes around to the side Waverly is climbing up.

 

Waverly pauses and then pulls her sister in for another hug. “Be careful, Baby Girl. I love you and I’ll see you soon.” Wynonna says quietly and pulls away, turning abruptly and heading back to the main cabin.

 

Waverly stares after her for a moment with a small, introspective smile on her face. She hadn’t called her Baby Girl since before her wedding to Champ. It was the last time she’d see her sister for years. But she knew she’d be seeing her again, not by the promise she’d made earlier, but by the look in her eyes. They were no longer lost and angry like they were all those years ago when they were growing up. They were settled and content now. She’d dare say happy even, and she knew she and her little family had something to do with that.

 

“You ready, my love?” Nicolas asks as he looks back at Nicky for a moment and then to Waverly with soft, warm eyes and crooked smile.

 

“Absolutely.” Waverly answers as her hand goes to Nicolas’ knee, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
